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Ryan Seacrest

0Ryan Seacrest Hopes You’ll Give ‘American Idol’ Another Chance

american idol

How do I put this gently? American Idol sucks ass. It has for years and it continues to get worse. Last year, even with Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey on the panel, the show was boring, uncomfortable and deserved to be canceled. Fox hoped that by bringing back Jennifer Lopez for this season, they can pick up in the ratings again, but seriously, people – just let this shit die already. Oh yeah, Harry Connick Jr.‘s on it, too.

Well, the troll that guards the Idol bridge, Ryan Seacrest, really wants you to give the show another shot to, I dunno, be good?

From The Hollywood Reporter:

“I will say this to those who have watched the show throughout the years and maybe they didn’t watch last year. I ask them to come back and give it another shot this year,” Seacrest told The Hollywood Reporter Friday on the red carpet at the Z100 Jingle Ball 2013 concert at Madison Square Garden. “The judges are so fun,  and they are having such a good time and they get along with each other so well that I think you will see your old American Idol back on the air.”

Well… no, I don’t think so. Even X Factor is shit. I think people are just tired of seeing the same old crap on TV all the time. It’s a fixed “competition” wherein the producers decide pretty early on who they want to win. They give the public the illusion of “voting” for their favourites, but we all know if an unpopular contestant – one that they deem unworthy – came out on top, those votes would be fixed. They prey on people with sob stories and it’s all just a mess. Idol has been on for like, 10 years now. It’s done. Say goodbye. Bow out with some small amount of grace.

That being said, I’ll be watching in January… but not because I enjoy it, because I have to live blog it for another job. It’s the bane of my existence.

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December 16, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer

3Kim Kardashian Breaks Silence on Motherhood: “It’s Crazy”

 

kim kardashian

Kim Kardashian has never really been a woman of words – at least not words anyone cared about hearing, that is. Still, she’s remained bizarrely silent since giving birth to America’s Kanye West‘s baby on Saturday nearly 5 weeks ahead of schedule, making everyone that much more hungry for details about the nameless child. Well, you’re not getting any of those, and you’re not even really getting a statement from Kimmypie, but what you will get is a sentence she apparently wrote in an email, as dictated by Ryan Seacrest. TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, PEOPLE!

From Ryan’s KIIS-FM show:

E! News’ Ken Baker phoned in to On Air with Ryan Seacrest to share that despite giving birth five weeks early, both baby and mom are healthy.

“This was not planned,” he explains. “It came on very quickly and when it was time for the baby to come, it was time for the baby to come.” Ken adds that the moment was so unexpected, “the whole family was [even] dispersed all over the place.”However, Ken confirms: “[The baby] is healthy and Kim is doing well … There’s a great sense of relief. Everyone is very happy for her and Kim is relieved [because] this was a very stressful time.”So now that her daughter is here, how does Kim feel about being a mom?Ryan shared he emailed her moments after she gave birth, saying, “Yay! Congrats my darling, you’re a mommy!” and that she responded: “Cant believe it! It’s so crazy!”

I love that Kim had time to get on email after giving birth. Because, you know, can’t miss those bids pouring in from People and US Weekly – gotta figure out which to sell the kid’s first pictures to, after all.

To be fair, I’m sure motherhood is “crazy”, but she’d better start believing it soon… unless of course the nanny’s are gonna raise this thing, which seems likely. That’s a random nanny, by the way, not The Nanny, Fran Drescher (though how great would that be?). I’ll show myself out.

June 19, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer

0Kendall Jenner Doesn’t Want to Be a Big Part of the Kardashian Reality Show Empire

kendall jenner

She may not get a choice, however. While Kendall and Kylie have always sorta floated along in the background of the Kardashian family’s insane collection of reality shows, she’s pretty okay with it. She still gets all the “opportunities” (as she calls them) associated with fame without having to actually be on camera 24/7 like her sisters. However, producer (LOL) Ryan Seacrest wants her to be a bigger part of Keeping Up with the Kardashians to portray her “coming of age” story. Oh, brother.

From The New York Times:

But in 2011, the network broadcast “Kendall’s Sweet 16,” a special that showed her attending her birthday party and getting her driver’s license. Since then, she has shown up more frequently in the series. “I don’t know any different,” she said of growing up on TV. Still, she added: “I don’t want to be a big part of the show. Neither does my little sister, only because we want for a little while to keep our somewhat normal lives.”

In a 2011 episode called “Kim Becomes a Stage Mom,” Ms. Jenner headed to New York for a gig modeling prom dresses, only to storm out of a runway coaching session after her half-sister pushed too hard. “I was just like, I don’t know,” Ms. Jenner said, explaining her behavior. “My sister was being kind of annoying, and I was just overwhelmed.”

Among other things, she had been concerned about missing cheerleading practice. Both Jenner sisters have since left Sierra Canyon; at their request, they’re now home-schooled to allow them more time to focus on careers. “It’s fun,” Ms. Jenner said. “There’s so many just crazy opportunities. That’s the upside.”

I actually remember that episode well – Kim was really pushing Kendall into the famewhore lifestyle. Kendall was being a brat, sure, but is there anything wrong with saying you don’t want to follow in crybaby Kim’s footsteps? I don’t think so.

Here’s what Ryan Seacrest had to say about changing things up:

“The original concept was the three primary sisters, but one of the things that we’ve noticed is the viewers have connected with Kendall growing up,” he said. “A coming of age story is always compelling.”

Stop the madness! In any case, Kendall is a pain in the ass. She wants all the benefits of fame without the “work”, and her claiming that she isn’t really into fame is just bullshit. If it weren’t for your family’s fame, you’d be just another California girl working a barista job at Starbucks inbetween desperately going for modeling auditions. Chill.

June 11, 2013 at 11:30 am by Jennifer

1Ryan Seacrest And Jennifer Lopez Had A Super Secret Meeting

Jennifer Lopez "Chime For Change: The Sound Of Change Live" Concert

American Idol is going through some major changes. Some of these changes include getting rid of pretty much everyone and getting new judges. Jennifer Hudson is a rumored choice, but the producers may be going back to an old favorite…Jennifer Lopez. How else to explain this ~~super secret~~ meeting between Ryan Seacrest and JLo?

RadarOnline has an exclusive:

Jennifer Lopez  and Ryan Seacrest held what was supposed to be a top-secret meeting on Friday, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

The pair met up at an industry office building in Beverly Hills, an eyewitness tells us.

“J.Lo was driven there by her regular driver.  Ryan arrived simultaneously, and didn’t look happy to have been spotted,” the source says.

As RadarOnline.com  has been exclusively reporting, Lopez is in discussions to return to the American Idol  judges desk next season.

Her meeting with Seacrest may mean negotiations have reached the next level.

Psh, “supposed to be a top-secret meeting” and “[Ryan] didn’t look happy to have been spotted” my ass. These bitches know what they’re doing.

I’m pretty sure though that getting the two Idol Jennifers onboard isn’t going to do much for their dying ratings. Maybe get Aniston in there. Do an all-Jennifer panel. Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Coolidge, Jennifer Tilly, Jennifer Connelly, Jennifer Esposito, Jennifer Grey, Jennifer Garner, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jennifer Morrison…but NOT Ginnifer Goodwin. She doesn’t count. She is a traitor to all Jennifers.

June 9, 2013 at 4:00 pm by Catherine St. Ives

6Oh, F-ck Off: Gwyneth Paltrow Is Bringing Her Bullshit To Video

gwyneth paltrow tracy anderson

It’s not enough that Gwyneth Paltrow wants to tell you how wrong your life is and how right hers always has and always will be at every available opportunity in print. No, now she’s going to bring along fellow psycho, advocate of the 700 calorie per day diet and “personal trainer” Tracy Anderson for a ten episode online mini-series called Second Chances. As in, you don’t always have to be a fat, poor failure! If you listen to me and Tracy here, we’ll give you a second chance at being just like us!

Think that doesn’t sound bad enough? Well, think again. Ryan Seacrest Productions is bankrolling and producing this bullshit. Lord, give me strength.

From Variety:

“It’s a new focus for us, in the context of this company,” he said of digital development at Ryan Seacrest Prods.

The Paltrow project emanated from TV development that Ryan Seacrest Prods. was working on with the A-list actress. “Second Chances,” which co-stars fitness guru Tracy Anderson, reveals the inspiring stories of women who’ve overcome all manner of adversity.

AOL is expected to announce “Second Chances” as part of its newfronts slate on Tuesday in New York.

Hilariously, this seems a whole lot like Amanda de Cadenet’s The Conversation, which Gwyneth appeared on but failed to secure a second season from Lifetime. Oopsies.

May 1, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer

12Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough Are No More

ryan seacrest julianne hough

Nooooo, how could this be happening? How could true love die?!?! Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough, the American Idol generation’s one shining beacon of everlasting love (LOL) and a possible example of proper bearding techniques are no longer together. This actually does kind of suck, ‘cos they were sort of weirdly adorable together, in that way that those stuffed animasl an ex won you at a carnival that’re now sitting in a trash bag in your basement is. If you want to know what the hell I’m talking about, good luck, because I don’t know either.

In any case, US Weekly reports that the split was probably amicable but was definitely due to the distance – after all, with both living and working in Los Angeles and the traffic on the 405 being shitty pretty much all hours of the day, it’s too much ground to cover, too much adversity to overcome.

And the notoriously busy Hollywood pair, who began dating in 2010, may have their packed schedules to blame.

“Honestly, their schedules were too hectic,” a source tells Us. “It just got to be too much. I think they both just sort of knew they couldn’t do it anymore. The travel and lifestyle got to be too much. Who knows if this is just for now, but I think this is for good.”

In all seriousness, relationships do require the people in them to, you know, have time together and maybe their careers are making that impossible, so whatevs. I’ll try to dry my tears, here.

March 16, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer
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