Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Ryan Gosling

The Blue Valentine Trailer is Here and it’s Every Bit as Cute as I Thought it Would Be

So, remember I was telling you about this movie that starred Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams? The one in which I got my first in-real-life glance at a scruffy Gosling in a hat, on the very day I happened to be moving from the area in which the film was being shot? Yup, it’s the very same Blue Valentine and I am stoked.

The flick, which will be debuting in theaters soon (some say December in the US), has finally released its trailer to those who weren’t lucky enough to see it at the film festival at Cannes or Toronto, and it looks good. The rating, however, might deter a lot of theaters from future showings, and it might further prevent a lot of people from checking it out. The film’s current MPAA rating is NC-17, due to sex scenes that many are considering ‘raw’ and ‘explicit,’ but sources are saying that there’s a possibility that the films editors might remove such footage to drop the rating down to a family-friendly ‘R.’

I don’t give a shit either way, me. The trailer is cute, kitschy, and has a distinct hipster-indie vibe, and that makes it all-around appealing to me. Plus it depicts Ryan Gosling having sex. Could it get any better than that? …

I thought not.

Remember I Was Asking About Blue Valentine?

It debuted at Cannes a few months back, and supposedly at the most recent Toronto Independent Film Festival, it’s kicking some more ass. So, uh, the question remains: when is it going to be available to the public? I’m sure you all remember my long-winded diatribe of how I “met” Ryan Gosling while he was filming this movie in a town where I used to live, so this movie — already — holds unseen value to me at this point.

I’ve gotta see it. Any of you lucky enough to be at either of these film festivals, or maybe somehow snagged a bootleg of the production? I mean, I know that kind of thing is sort of frowned upon by the law and whatever, but it’s not as if I’m going to tell anyone or anything.

Ryan Gosling Shows Off His DIY Tattoos

I’m really big into crafting. I like cutting up my clothes and sewing beads on things and refurbishing furniture I find on the street, so please know that I have no problem with expressing oneself creatively. But Ryan Gosling takes it too far. We all know this dude has inked himself, but homeboy showed up to the airport today with at least one or two more designs permanently drawn on his arm. Does Ryan long to do prison time and are these tats are just his way of trying to fit in? Is this a more advanced, artistic way of self-mutilating? I mean, think of all the things that could go wrong while inking yourself and then think about the fact that this dude’s taken that risk more than once.

I’d rather jump out of a plane.

New Couple Alert: Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams?

photo of ryan gosling michelle williams kissing

Okay, I might have to kill myself. Really. Ryan Gosling is like, my man. There’s a whole slew of male celebrities that I find to be uber-attractive, but Gosling tops the list. Then Adrien Brody, then Bear Grylls … the rest is just fluff.

Have you heard of the new movie, Blue Valentine? Cool fucking story. Gosling and Williams filmed this movie — no lie — last spring in the town in which I last lived, Honesdale, Pennsylvania. I remember hearing that Gosling was coming to town and was completely depressed that I wasn’t going to be around to see him or meet him or rape him, because I was moving, like, two weeks after they were to commence filming. The whole (tiny) town was abuzz — it was as if they’d never seen celebrities before, but that wasn’t true. An older movie, Wet, Hot, American Summer was filmed there, too, sometime back in 2001 or something.

Anyway, I was totally just getting off on the fact that I was sharing the same town as my mega-celeb crush, Ryan Gosling and it, to that point, was enough for me. I was ready to pack up and leave the little town behind me, sans-seeing Ryan Gosling and be okay with it. I’d made my peace.

However, the early, early morning I was set to embark upon my 5+ hour drive south, I had to go into town and gas up the old vehicle. Driving down a dark side street, I slowed to see some blockades illuminated by spotlights on one of the crossways. I bit my lip and said a quick prayer that they were, indeed, shooting some scenes for Blue Valentine. And guess what. They fucking were. I drove (verrrrry, verryyyy) slowly past the scene and caught my first-person glimpse of Ryan Gosling, and I’ll never forget it: he wore a flannel button-down shirt and dark pants, had about six weeks worth the growth of facial hair and wore a faded baseball cap. Though it was about 3 or 4 AM and still wicked dark, I had gotten my wish: to see Ryan Gosling in person. Lame, lame, I know. Whatever.

The movie, which premiered at the Cannes Film Festival this past week (the initial premiere was at the Sundance Festival back in January), was said to open to rave reviews. I totally want to see it, just because I used to live there. Oh, yeah, and because Ryan Gosling’s in it. The movie was said to be such a hit because the chemistry between the two main characters, played by Gosling and Michelle Williams, was thick enough to cut with a dull butter knife. The on-screen couple were also said to be quite cozy at Cannes, holding hands and … gulp … nuzzling. And People magazine is claiming rumors about love on the set to be true:

“You know actors who meet on movie sets,” [People's exclusive source] said. “It can be the most romantic place in the world.”

The most romantic place in the world. Honesdale, Pennsylvania. Where I briefly lived for three years. Forty miles east of my hometown of Scranton (yeah, home of The Office). See what happens? I fucking move away and Ryan Gosling falls in love in Honesdale, Pennsylvania. Why not me, God? Why not me?

It’s Over!

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Listen, I don’t think it’s even mentionable that Rachel McAdams and Josh Lucas broke up.  Did anyone even know care that they were together in the first place?  No.  But since Jessica and Nick have been such a reconciliation disappointment, I’ve shifted my focus to Rachel McAdams.

Isn’t it possible, now that she’s single again, that she can get back with Ryan Gosling?  Didn’t they seem like the perfect couple even outside of the roles they played in The Notebook?  Where did it go wrong with those two and can it be fixed?  I need a happy Hollywood ending and God only knows that I’m not going to get it from Lindsay and Sam.  Work it out Rach and Ry — do it for me!

Ryan Gosling, “In the Room Where You Sleep”

In The Room Where You Sleep

Here’s the video for “In the Room Where You Sleep,” a song by Ryan Gosling’s band, Dead Man’s Bones.

This is just kind of a little too weird for me. His voice sounds weird, and the song is weird, and I kind of don’t understand why we have to drag so many young children into this creepiness.

Also, I feel obliged to point out that what he’s doing with the piano is very, very easy stuff. Like, it’s nice that he’s playing and all, but this is not exactly pianism that’s gonna make Tori Amos sit up and take notice.

I dunno.

I think I don’t like it.