Poor Prince Harry. Imagine not even being able to play a simple game of strip billiards without having the photos leaked and everyone getting all up in your business. Honestly, if a man can’t go to Vegas and get naked with some girls under the pretense of playing pool, then what has the world even come to?
But things aren’t all bad. Thanks to the leaked photos, Harry has gotten offers from Playgirl (one million dollars for dick pics) AND Chippendales (this one’s a job opportunity, so there’s no specific details on the payment). But now he’s got an offer that he simply can’t refuse: Vivid Entertainment wants to give him ten million dollars, just to star in a porno flick.
Oh my god, you guys, I’m just kidding. Not about the offer – that’s real – but the part about it being an offer he can’t refuse. Because of course he’ll refuse it. Why are these people even bothering with this? Do they not realize how much money he already has? That he won’t need any money for the rest of his whole entire life? Do these people honestly think that Harry might consider their offers, or are they just goofing? I need answers!
But just in case Harry does accept Vivid’s offer, I want you all to know that the film will be titled The Trouble with Harry, and according to the boss over at Vivid, “the sex will be well-scripted.” Of course it will, guy. Of course it will.
August 27, 2012 at 5:30 am by Emily
After those lovely photos of Prince Harry playing strip pool were leaked, it didn’t take the guy long to get on a plane headed back home. And when he gets there, the queen herself is going to send him straight to his room without dinner. No cell phone, no computer, and no video games, either. Because Harry needs time to think about what he’s done. He’s been a very, very bad boy.
From Us Weekly:
Prince Harry is in hot water after TMZ posted naked photos of the single British royal, 27, partying in a Las Vegas hotel room last weekend.
“This is a mess,” a source close to Harry tells Us Weekly. “This was not the type of fun he was supposed to be having. He’s in trouble.”
But the third-in-line to the British throne isn’t the only culpable party in the debacle.
“Protection officers are also in trouble because they could have controlled this,” the source explains of the pics, in which Harry and others (including an apparently nude young woman) were playing “strip pool.”
But a second source close to the party-hearty redhead shrugs off the birthday suit brouhaha.
“He’s a lad!” the second insider says. “This is just him messing about on holiday. No one was hurt, he’s on proper vacation from his work, so he’s not breaking any rules. He’s using his own money.”
And however shocking the snapshots appear, “The photos look sleazier than they are,” the source continues. “They were playing strip billiards.”
It’s not the first time Harry has been photographed in a less-than-dignified light. Back in 2005, he attended a costume party wearing a Nazi swastika armband, later apologizing for the “poor choice of costume.”
One royal watcher who’s not applauding the naked snapshots? His more mild-mannered big brother.
“William was told about the photos this morning,” a third royal insider tells Us of Kate Middleton’s hubby, 30. “He’s not impressed.”
I get that Harry has this image he’s supposed to uphold or whatever, but no. He’s a 27-year-old dude who went to Vegas and got into a friendly game of strip billiards on his vacation. I think we can let him pass on the public flogging, just this once.
August 22, 2012 at 3:30 pm by Emily
So as it turns out, Prince Harry was playing a little strip pool, and the ladies he was playing with decided to take it to Twitter. AND POSTED NAKED PHOTOS OF PRINCE HARRY TO TWITTER. Do you understand the gravity of the situation? Nudes! Prince Ginger Harry nudes!
In one of the two shots (above), Harry is seen cupping his genitals to preserve some … I don’t know, modesty, or maybe it was because he just didn’t want to show off. I mean, we’ve all seen his penis anyway, so we know it’s nothing to be ashamed of, so I’m thinking it’s probably that second thing I said. In the second shot (after the jump, due to it’s semi-NSFW nature), he’s seen “bear-hugging” another naked woman with his ass crack exposed. And when I say “bear-hugging,” I mean something along the lines of “butt-f-cking,” if that term isn’t too passe to use.
Anyway, this is what a rep for the royal family had to say about the photos:
“We have no comment to make on the photos at this time.”
Images courtesy of TMZ
August 22, 2012 at 6:30 am by Sarah
Do you remember that royal wedding business? It was a little over a year ago, and everyone made a huge fuss over it? Kate Middleton wore a really pretty dress. You remember! It was a pretty sweet day, but in an interview that Prince William and Prince Harry just did with Katie Couric, there was something that could have made it just a bit sweeter.
Despite the overabundance of dignitaries in attendance on his 2011 wedding day to Kate Middleton, there was one person missing, though very much on Prince William’s mind: his mother, Princess Diana.
“Very difficult” is how the prince recalls her absence that day, as he reveals during an ABC interview airing Tuesday night, as part of The Jubilee Queen with Katie Couric.
“I sort of prepared myself beforehand so that I was sort of mentally prepared … I didn’t want any wobbly lips or anything going on,” says William, 29. “It’s the one time since she’s died, where I’ve … thought to myself it would be fantastic if she was here, and just how sad really for her, more than anything, not being able to see it.”
Diana was killed in a Paris car crash in August 1997, when William was 15.
“I think she … she would have loved the day and I think, hopefully, she’d be very proud,” he tells Couric. “I’m just very sad that she’s never going to get a chance to meet Kate.”
Prince Harry, 27, also gets a chance to remark on his brother’s wedding day and what it would have meant to their mother.
“I think she had the best seat in the house, probably,” says Harry. “But yeah, she would have loved to have been there.”
I hadn’t had a good cry in a while, so I was planning on watching Precious and snuggling my kitten this evening, but this did the trick. I’ve never been a big Princess Di buff or anything like that – I was only nine years old when she died – but around the time of the wedding, I got interested in the royal family and all the traditions and history and all that, and I read a bit about her. From what I read, I think it’s easy to understand why so many people were so enchanted with her, and it goes without saying that she would have been just radiant at the wedding.
But, oh goodness, Harry’s line, “I think she had the best seat in the house”? I don’t know why, but that kind of thinking about someone who has passed away always gets me. I’m not even religious, but the idea that someone’s in a better place or that someone’s watching down on you, I think that’s the sweetest, saddest thing.
Did you have a good cry, too?
May 30, 2012 at 6:30 am by Emily
I have to make an apology to all of you who were hoping that precious Pippa would be shacking up with Prince Harry: it ain’t happening. Not with Prince Harry’s new girlfriend in the mix, anyway. This girl is Florence Brudenell-Bruce, and I suppose she’s some kind of lingerie model (this is, at least, what I’m guessing based on the photos).
According to sources who “know” Florence:
Florence Brudenell-Bruce is the daughter of Andrew Brudenell-Bruce, a wine merchant, and the artist Sophie Brudenell-Bruce. She grew up in Fulham and was privately educated at Woldingham School in Surrey, and then at Stowe School in Buckinghamshire. She went on to graduate from Bristol University with a degree in the History of Art.
Florence Brudenell-Bruce is a descendant of the seventh Earl of Cardigan who led the Charge of the Light Brigade during the Crimean War.
Brudenell-Bruce has appeared in a number of advertising campaigns including those for John Lewis, Knickerbox and Ann Summers.In 2009 Brudenell-Bruce starred in the film Love Aaj Kal. In 2011 she appeared in the TV series Lewis. Brudenell-Bruce is the former girlfriend of Jenson Button. In 2011 she began a relationship with Prince Harry.
Guess Pippa didn’t really ever have a chance at all – Harry apparently prefers blondes, huh?
July 5, 2011 at 7:30 am by Sarah
Apparently Prince Harry and Pippa Middleton were spotted having “tea and cakes” together, alone, at an upscale pub in the UK during the last week of May. It’s being rumored to be the first (public) reunion of Pippa and Harry since the Royal Wedding back in April. Eyewitnesses say:
Pippa Middleton, the younger sister of Kate Middleton, was spotted meeting up with Prince Harry at The Troubador pub in London’s Chelsea last month, reports The People newspaper. Pippa Middleton and Harry enjoyed a secret catch-up where they laughed and joked while sharing tea and cakes in the discreet garden area.
The pair, who spent almost two hours at the historic pub, were reportedly meeting for the first time since the Royal Wedding on 29th April 2011. One regular at ‘The Troubador’ said, “Pippa and Harry were most certainly here last week. They sat together and had afternoon tea and cakes. They were alone, with no one else near to them. Everyone left them alone, as this is the sort of place you can come to and escape from the rest of the world while you are inside”.
So, tea and cakes, huh? Is that like the English version of coffee and, I don’t know, doughnuts? Is this a serious thing? Do people go and get “cakes and tea” if they’re about to get it awnnnn? Is it a fancy prerequisite? AM I THE STEREOTYPICAL OBNOXIOUS AMERICAN? Yeah, well.
Most importantly, however, do you guys even care about Pippa and Harry‘s bone status?