Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Peaches Geldof

Peaches Geldof Is Pregnant Again

A photo of Peaches Geldof

Peaches Geldof, famous offspring of famous people, is pregnant with her second child. This is notable for a few reasons. One, here’s a photo of her with her first child:

A photo of Peaches Geldof

Two, that poor first child is only six months old, and Peaches is already three-and-a-half months pregnant. And that is insane. That sounds like a nightmare. Even Peaches herself admitted that it would be a nightmare:

“I did have a momentary panic and go, ‘Oh my God, we’re going to have a one-year-old and a one-month-old! How will we cope?’”

But then her husband told her to chill and everything was cool again.

Oh, and here’s the third reason why Peaches’ pregnancy is notable: she’s already picked out a name for her kid. She’s going to have another little boy, and she’s going to name him Phaedra. No, really. If you think that’s a totally girly name, it’s because it’s the name of a female character in Greek mythology who falls in love with her stepson and then kills herself. Super great choice of names, Peaches. I’m sure that kid will have it way easy growing up.

On the bright side, here’s a photo that Peaches posted of her little baby son (the one that’s already out of the womb):

A photo of Peaches Geldof's son, Astala

AWWWW!!!

Peaches Geldof Is A Great Mom

A photo of Peaches Geldof

No, I know what you’re thinking. It’s probably either “why are we talking about Peaches Geldof?” or “when did Peaches Geldof become a mom?” or “who is Peaches Geldof?” or if you’re more in the know, you might just be wondering why I said that Peaches Geldof is a great mom. And those are all very, very fair questions.

Peaches is famous because she’s the daughter of other famous people, but also because she’s a hot mess. She became a mom back in April when she gave birth to a little boy that she named Astala, and she married the baby’s father, Thomas Cohen, over the weekend (which is important later!). We’re talking about her because she found a way to combine those two things, being a mom and being a hot mess, quite impressively.

A photo of Peaches Geldof

THIS BITCH. But here’s the clincher:

A photo of Peaches Geldof

Please note how her baby stroller managed to topple over with the baby inside, how the baby fell on the sidewalk, and how Peaches bent down to pick up the baby, all while never getting off her phone. But I guess all’s well that ends well, because the baby is fine and Peaches has some Very Strong Thoughts about the sidewalks in London. Here are her outraged tweets:

Was just walking with Astala in his pram and there was a massive hole in the pavement I didn’t see as was pushing the pram and the pram fell into it and toppled over! Thankfully Astala didn’t fall out as was strapped in and so didnt get hurt at all or cry. But still the London pavements are SO dangerous!

If he had fallen out he could have seriously hurt himself! And it’s impossible to see these cracks When pushing a pram

The mayor of london should do something about it it’s ridiculous! Thank god Astala is ok! X

That was after the incident, but after the photos were published, she tweeted this big long rant about how the photos were just a way of getting back at her for not allowing a certain publication to take photos at her wedding. She said that they were just making up “rude stories about my mothering ability because London’s roads are so crappy and dangerous.”

Peaches. Girl, look. I don’t even have a kid, but I understand that things happen. I understand that sometimes you can drop a baby, and sometimes you can knock a baby against a wall while you’re carrying it. Sometimes, obviously, you can even hit a bump in a sidewalk and turn your baby’s stroller over. Accidents happen, and it doesn’t make you a bad parent. Nobody thinks that you pushed your kid’s stroller down. We get it. What we don’t get is how you can watch your baby hit the pavement and not, you know, get off the phone.

Peaches Geldof Has Strong Feelings About Ron Weasley

A photo of Peaches Geldof

As if the photo above of Peaches Geldof getting ready to smooch on a magazine poster of Rupert Grint wasn’t enough, Peaches went ahead and discussed her feelings further on Twitter:

Little known fact about me: I’ve been writing Harry Potter fan fiction under a pseudonym for quite a while now. I’m never revealing myself!!

‘Ron: The Ginger Hero’, by Peaches Honeyblossom Geldof. ‘Ron, ron, your name- a song, your hair, a flame, your eyes of green…’

…’Ron, Ron, it wont be long, til you and Hermoine, can finally be happy. The whole world is ready, for you to go steady, so cast a spell..

‘…and time will tell, you’re a ginger legend, Ron. Ron, Ron, be brave and strong, help Harry out, crush Voldy’s snout.” THE END THANKS.

Please tweet me your Harry Potter inspired poems so I can read them & subsequently quench my bout of Potter fever that’s raging right now…

Do you guys like Peaches’ poem?  I think I’m going to give it an A for effort, because you can tell the girl really loves her some Weasley.  And if I knew that I could use Twitter to write elementary level fan poetry, you best believe I would have been on that months ago.  So well done, Peaches, and I hope you share more of your art with us soon.