Nicolas Cage is being sued by his bank after not making payments on his line of credit. Apparently the bank extended a $2 million line of credit to the actor and he agreed to make payments of $12,000 a month. He hasn’t made a payment on the account since May, and now the bank is invoking its right to demand the full balance immediately.

And you thought your credit card debt was bad. This makes me feel really, really good about being only $3,000 in the hole.

Cage has been attempting to liquidate his assets, including a bunch of real estate, in an effort to pay off his debts. When I went to New Orleans a few weeks ago, I took one of those historic ghost tours, and guess whose mansion was the primary stop? Apparently Cage’s three story French Quarter mansion is a bargain at $3.5 million, but no one will touch it because of the crazy, horrific  shit that is rumored to have gone on there– buckets of brains, intestines nailed to the floor, and a lot of other macabre stuff that is almsot as inhuman as Cage’s acting.

Kick ‘em when they’re down! Bam!

Paris appeared at the Venice Film Festival this weekend with her on-again boyfriend, Doug Reinhardt.  Doug was looking very two-dimensional and was airbrushed within an inch of his life.

There were a few other notables there, but I’m willing to bet attendance was down at this year’s festival.  Damn economy.  I’m really, really hoping Eva Mendes hasn’t fallen off the wagon since her rehab stint, but ahhh … well, you can judge for yourself.  Mel Brown was looking very pink and Matt Damon was looking very goofy.  Nicolas Cage — don’t you love it when people get all familiar with him and refer to him as “Nick?” — and a very androgynous looking Tilda Swinton were there as well.

Nicolas Cage owes $6.2 Million in back taxes to the IRS.

The tax lien stems from unpaid income taxes for 2007. Months ago, the star settled another debt with the IRS, paying $666,000 in penalties for improperly deducted personal expenses. Cage’s $3.5 Million New Orleans mansion is currently up for sale, as is his $35 Million Hollywood home. All sure signs that the actor is flat broke and is trying to dig himself out of a massive hole of debt.

At first I felt kind of bad for him, but then I came to my senses and realized that’s ridiculous. Poor impoverished movie star. He might have to move to a mansion that’s only worth $1 Million, or start drinking coffee that hasn’t first been passed through the bowels of a civet cat.

It’s always been a mystery to me how actors and actresses could make millions and still end up penniless. I guess it just goes to show you that it doesn’t really matter how much money you make if you’re living above your means.