2Naomi Campbell’s Assault Story Keeps Changing

From Page Six:

After we reported Naomi Campbell was attacked by Paris muggers who injured her leg, the supermodel addressed the incident at a Television Critics Association press conference yesterday.

“I had an injury of my knee and I am on the mend. I cannot discuss any further as there is an investigation,” Campbell said while promoting her upcoming series, “The Face,” in LA. Campbell was attacked by thugs in November as she tried to get into a car, Page Six reported exclusively last week, and suffered what’s suspected to be a torn ligament. The beauty has recently been seen without a wheelchair, but wearing flat shoes rather than heels.

But wait. Wait. Because I thought that there was no investigation, because there was no report made? Didn’t French law enforcement officials all agree that none of them knew anything about a gorgeous, British, model citizen (ha, see what I did there?) being attacked on the streets of Paris while hailing a cab like a … well, like some common person? Wasn’t it altogether determined that Naomi wasn’t pressing charges in the incident, because she didn’t know who had attacked her, and really, wanted to keep it all kind of private anyhow?

Gosh, it just confuses the hell out of me when stories like this evolve and evolve and evolve. Next thing we’ll be hearing is something about a phone actually causing the injury. Maybe it’ll be that there was a cord or something that Naomi was ultimately tripped by or over, or something. Who knows.

Stay well, girl!

January 8, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Sarah

8Naomi Campbell Got Her Ass Kicked, is in a Wheelchair

From TMZ:

Naomi Campbell reportedly suffered a torn ligament in her leg when she was mugged on a street in Paris.

The supermodel was hailing a cab when she was attacked and robbed by multiple assailants reports the NY Post. The attack — which occurred more than a month ago — left Campbell in a wheelchair and crutches.

The Post says Campbell’s boyfriend, Vladimir Doronin, has upped her security since the incident.

When called for comment about the incident, Campbell told the paper, “I am sorry, I do not talk to press, but I am fine.”

So I’m not going to make any crass comments about karma and phone-throwing and staff-abusing, because it’s never cool when anyone hurts or maims anyone for any reason, but wow. Naomi Campbell, “brutally mugged”? Yikes. Is no one safe these days?

But hey— here’s a note of interest: when French police were asked about the incident, they claimed that they had no knowledge whatsoever about an attack on Naomi Campbell or any other non-French traveler in recent weeks. A law enforcement source said, “A high profile celebrity being attacked in Paris would be something everybody remembers. If such a serious crime had taken place then a criminal enquiry would have started by now – especially if the victim ended up in a wheelchair.” Naomi, as you can see in the photo above, is indeed in a wheelchair (and not just a wheelchair—a Jazzy).

Naomi, however, was brief in her description of the attack, as noted by TMZ. Despite her brevity, a “friend” tells the New York Post that there was way more to it than just being knocked down and ending up OK—the source said, “It was terrifying [for her]. Naomi believes the assailant had been watching her, casing her out, and waited for a moment to strike when she was alone. She was attacked in the street as she hailed a cab, and robbed. Her leg was injured as she was violently pushed to the ground. She was understandably very upset and shaken up.”

Even further bizarre is the fact that other sources are also saying that it would be completely out of character for Naomi to hail a cab—alone—when she’s more of a higher-maintenance traveler than that. An employee at a limousine service that Naomi utilized in the past had this to say about his former client’s taxi-shunning ways:

“The thought of Naomi Campbell hailing a taxi in the street is laughable, let alone the idea that a gang would attack her. It all sounds absolutely bizarre. Naomi is quite a demanding lady, and always has lots of assistants around her too. She’s seldom alone!”

What a weird thing, huh? Get well soon, Naomi!

January 4, 2013 at 9:30 am by Sarah

4Naomi Campbell’s Extensive Damage

See that picture up there, folks? That’s Naomi Campbell and her hair after years and years and years of extension-wearing and chemical processing. Holy crow.

Naomi’s forty-two years old, and I think it’s a safe bet to make in assuming that she’s pretty much done her hair in for good. As well as her reputation for not being a phone-throwing diva. There’s still that, too.

But hey, maybe she’s just gotten to the point where she doesn’t care any longer. This damage has been evident for a long time, and even if you look at photos of her from back in 2009, and even as early as 2007 and 2006, you’ll see that the problem’s only gotten worse and worse. If she’s beyond the point of worrying about it, I have to give her props, because it only makes her a stronger woman. If she is bellyaching about it, though, she’s only got one lady to blame.

A word of advice? Leave your hair alone. Seriously. I started dyeing and highlighting and stripping my hair back when I was probably sixteen or so (sorry, Mom!), and went on with it for about a decade and then one day decided to chop it all off and start afresh. I seriously haven’t touched my hair with chemicals or anything else in almost three years, and you just cannot imagine the good it’s done my hair and scalp. It’s an entirely different texture and color than it used to be, before I started over-processing it, but it’s healthy. And above all, it looks like real hair.

I guess that was a bit more than just a word, but guys, maybe if Naomi had taken this advice two decades ago, she wouldn’t be pulling her own hair out by the roots, and you can take that shit right to the bank.

August 9, 2012 at 9:30 am by Sarah

4Caption This: Naomi Campbell Texts Poolside

Naomi Campbell was snapped making this nasty face yesterday as she attempted to relax at the pool. My guess would be that she’s annoyed by the presence of the camera, but considering the fact that she’s a model, combined with her poor history of appropriate cellphone usage, any number of things could be ticking her off…

YOUR CAPTIONS IN THE COMMENTS, PLEASE!

November 30, 2010 at 3:22 pm by Molls

8Someone’s Got Thick Enough Skin to Marry Naomi Campbell? Say It Ain’t So!

Uber-diva temper-tantrum-phone-thrower Naomi Campbell has some very special news to share:

The model’s engaged! For real this time! Her current boyfriend (and Russian billionaire), Vladimir/Vladislav Doronin, pretty much confirmed what we’ve suspected for a couple years, now: the two actually are engaged. Although Campbell was photographed back in 2008 with an emerald engagement-like ring on her all-important finger, nothing had been set in stone.

Doronin spoke to Life.ru recently about his relationship with the violent model and stated:

“I can’t say it took us long to decide who will be bridesmaid. We are good friends with (Russian entrepreneur) Dasha Zhukova, she is a wonderful person and talented designer. So she will be next to Naomi at our wedding.”

Doronin must dig the whole crazy-lady-undergoing-amped-up-hormone-treatments type of thing because despite her long history of braining folks with phones and other blunt objects, he’s still marrying her. Campbell’s latest assault was on an unwitting cameraman, who she took a swipe at on a recent ABC interview. After being asked whether or not she had received a “blood diamond,” she walked off the set and knocked the nearest camera over.

Hope your marriage home has unbreakable crap in it, Doronin. But fuck, you’re a billionaire. Consider your shared stuff with Naomi to be a disposable investment or whatever.

April 23, 2010 at 8:32 am by Sarah

13If You Can Believe This, Naomi Campbell Hit Someone

Yeah, so, Naomi Campbell smacked some driver in NYC upside the head today. Then she fled the scene, because she’s all class like that. Here’s the run-down:

A man hired to drive Naomi Campbell told police the supermodel assaulted him from the back seat of a luxury SUV on Tuesday before hopping out and running away.

Police were looking to speak with Campbell, who is known for her feisty temper, and were weighing whether to charge her.

A spokesman for Campbell, who has previously pleaded guilty to assaulting people hired to work for her, said she’ll cooperate with police. “There shouldn’t be a rush to judgment,” spokesman Jeff Raymond said. “Naomi will cooperate voluntarily, and there is more to the story than meets the eye.”

The driver, whose name wasn’t immediately released, told police he pulled the black Cadillac Escalade over in midtown Manhattan after Campbell hit him from behind and his head struck the steering wheel, causing bruising under his right eye. He spoke to a traffic agent, who alerted police. Campbell was not at the scene when officers arrived, police said.

I love how, whenever shit like this goes down, the PR flacks for these celebrities immediately issue statements that “there’s more to this than meets the eye.” In this case, it’s especially hilarious, because the only obvious thing to meet the eye is the steering wheel of this dude’s SUV after Naomi Campbell physically assaulted him. Like, what’s the part of this we don’t understand? The part where the driver took a wrong turn and there was no absolutely no alternative other than to hit him? Because if we don’t hit the help when they make a mistake, how are they supposed to learn? You guys should have seen my housekeeper after she put a fork in the spoon compartment of my silverware drawer. Suffice it to say she will never make that mistake again. (Also, if you can think of an animal bite that looks like a fork stab, please contact me asap. It’s important.)

I don’t feel like I really need to run down all of Naomi’s past employee assaults for you guys. You read celebrity gossip blogs. If you have questions, all you need to do is parse through the expansive “Legal Issues” section of her Wikipedia page.

March 2, 2010 at 6:10 pm by Evil Beet