Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Miley Cyrus

Helen Mirren Goes Topless For New York Magazine

photo of helen mirren naked in a bathtub

I love Helen Mirren. And I know that she’s got a massive movie repertoire of fabulous roles and big-name productions, but you know what I remember her most for? Her best performance, in my opinion, to date? Teaching Mrs. Tingle. Remember that movie? Where Joey Potter Katie Holmes, the good girl, loses her V-card to that creepy close-eyed guy from whatever wholesome show used to be on, 7th Heaven or whatever, and they take the bitch teacher, Mrs. Tingle, hostage in her own home?

Crazy movie.

Mirren’s taking on another role, where she plays a Madam in Reno, Nevada, and her character’s supposed to be just as off-the-wall as Mrs. Tingle. Mirren recently sat with New York Magazine and bared her soul — and her boobies:

On being “notorious”:

“I am a little notorious… It’s weird when your life becomes vintage, like a period movie … I’m getting less notorious as I get older. People forget that I ever was.”

On being “the good girl who’d like to be a bad one”:

“It’s true! I haven’t grown out of that, have I?” she says, laughing. “I’m still the good girl who wants to be a bad girl. But I’ll never make it as a bad girl … I’m not a prude or a moralist and I never have been, but I’m too fearful, too much of a wimp, really.” When her husband tried to convince her to spend a night at the Mustang Ranch, Mirren refused. “I said, ‘Read my lips: I’m not going to spend a night in a brothel.’?” In the end, she dispensed with research and simply took direction. “It’s amazing how quickly you get into dildos everywhere and pink-feather handcuffs. Within an hour you’re completely used to it.”

Mirren on the younger generation:

“I’m thrilled young girls are claiming their sexuality for themselves … I love bold women: Madonna and Scarlett Johansson—sexy and gorgeous, but not only that. And Miley Cyrus—fantastic! And Lady Gaga. I love the way she’s elevated pop to performance art, or dragged performance art down to pop, or maybe made a wonderful amalgam of the two.” With her coy smile, Mirren looks like the conspiring queen who’s usurped the throne, securing the kingdom for her heirs: “My girls: Miley, Scarlett, Lady Gaga. My team … Yes.”

I’ll bet Dame Helen wouldn’t object to non-crotch shots of Miley Cyrus. She’d probably laugh and scoff and say, “That wasn’t a crotch shot back in my day … You wanna see a crotch shot? I’ll show you a crotch shot …”

And shortly thereafter, pandemonium ensues.

Yikes … She Really Can’t Be Tamed

Did you guys see Miley’s performance on last night’s MMV Awards in Canada? No, I didn’t either, but I did check out a couple of recaps early this morning. And my favorite, by far, was Miley throwing caution to the wind and exposing her own vagina (is it still child pornography, Perez, if the “child” in question wears articles — or rather, non-articles — of clothing for the purpose of intentionally exposing genitals?).

Let’s do some math. Vulva measurement across: 2.3 inches. Fabric measurement for costume crotch-landing-strip: 1.5 inches. I mean really. Because, damn. Girl’s only seventeen, but seventeen doesn’t exempt you from basic math skills, for crying out loud. And also, the fact that I want to find out the name of her obviously-talented Brazilian waxer doesn’t detract at all from the creepiness that surrounds the fact that she’s totally bare.

If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go and be uncomfortable, while making sure that all of my bustier bodysuits have ample crotch coverage. This shit just looks painful.  And embarrassing.

Miley Always Has The Hottest Boyfriends :(

Miley and Liam Do Date Night

I don’t really dig the model type, but between Justin Gaston and this Liam Hemsworth cat, Miley Cyrus has pulled in some seriously genetically blessed men. Last night she and Liam headed out on a date and the paparazzi pics show that he’s seriously, ridiculously good-looking. Do you think he’s in it for the cameras, the money or is Miley Cyrus irresistible to grade A hunks?

Miley Cyrus Guest Stars on Good Morning America, Performs With Bret Michaels

The girl’s growing on me. Honest. But I’m still going to rip the performance. I was far, far more stoked to see Michaels perform (again!) than I ever could be for a Miley performance. Not to mention, and yeah, I know it’s a live show, but she was wicked flat throughout a lot of the song. But yet, this song made the final cut to her latest album, Can’t Be Tamed. Who knows.

Miley also interviewed this morning on GMA, and discussed various topics including her coming-of-age-ness and her fans:

“You have to be who you are to the full. There’s nothing that I’m holding back. And that’s what I want to give to my girl fans. Just be who you are … It’s always going to be hard because there’s so much stuff you’ve got to get through before you an get to the stuff that’s real. There’s all the people that are like, ‘Yes! It’s gonna be great! You’re the biggest thing ever!’ when really, I just want the truth.”

Cyrus also discusses her latest upskirt scandal, and includes her thoughts on Perez Hilton:

“There are people that are negative just to be that way. You’ve got to push through all that and just be like ‘This is my life.’ ”

Good words, Miley. Not a terrible interview. But just “damn” on today’s singing. You’re pretty talented, but this was definitely one of those off-days.

Some Fat Dude With A Blog Is In Big Trouble For Tweeting Miley Cyrus’ Vag

Perez Hilton Posts Lewd Miley Photos On Twitter

A blogger whose name I won’t even bother to write (you know who I’m talking about. That fat guy with the blue hair who cried on the Internet after Will.i.Am beat him up last year) is causing controversy over an image he posted to his Twitter page yesterday. The photo was of 17 year old pop star Miley Cyrus climbing out of a car crotch first, and it appeared that she was going comando. The blogger is claiming that it wasn’t actually a dirty pic saying, “Do you think I’m stupid enough to post a photo of Miley if she’s not wearing any underwear down there? Sure I like to be controversial, but I don’t want to go to jail,” but it sounds like his intent was to make his audience believe that that’s what they were seeing.

Although Miley seems unphased by the photo, writing the blogger off as “an idiot” on Ryan Seacrest’s radio show this morning, the blogger’s actions are considered criminal in the minds of many. Even if the so-called “vagina” was just a flap of leg chub, reporting it to be her private parts is just as bad as if it actually was. Putting a pornographic illusion of an underage girl is just as bad as posting an actual beaver shot in my mind.

Some People Have The Worst Taste in Music


Kristen Stewart is so aloof and moody that I would imagine her favorite song to be some Animal Collective joint or a Magnetic Fields jam or something. I really did not imagine that this chick’s music taste was as cheesy as her career choices. According to Kristen, her favorite song to listen to while she’s on set preparing to play Bella is something you might expect her tween fans to be rocking out to:

“I just listened to my normal music. Bella’s less tortured. She’s less conflicted. I mean … it’s the most she’s conflicted about the love triangle [but] that happens sort of at the end. But I don’t know, ‘The Climb‘ is my theme song — and I’m sticking to it.”

Hey, Kristen? Why don’t you listen to the soundtracks of the movies you’re in? Joan Jett or Florence and the Machine blow Miley Cyrus out of the water any day of the week. Ugh.

Miley Didn’t Make Out With a Girl, Y’all

All of last week people were talking about Miley Cyrus’ performance on Britain’s Got Talent in which the 17 year old singer gyrated in a sexy outfit and appeared to lock lips with one of her female dancers. But Miley says none of that is true! Our eyes were deceiving us!

Here’s what she had to say on her blog about the kiss:

“I performed ‘Can’t Be Tamed’ this week on one of my favorite shows here in the UK Britian’s Got Talent. Which is totally true, there were some amazinnnggg acts (but of course no one could focus on that.) I had such a blast and was so honored to be on that stage. That being said during my performance I supposedly ‘KISSED A GIRL’ and this is the newest thing to cause controversy.

I promise you I did not kiss her and it is ridiculous that two entertainers cant even rock out with each other without the media making it some type of story. I really hope my fans are not disappointed in me because the truth is I did nothing wrong. I got up there and did my job which is to perform to the best of my ability. I just want to put an end to this right now and just say one thing to everyone out there making this performance such a big deal.

GET OVER IT! NOTHING HAPPENED. THERE ARE WAYYYYYYY MORE IMPORTANT THINGS IN THE WORLD. Let’s start focusing a little less on making up ignorant rumors and focus a little more on world peace! We gotta a lot of work to do if we wan this earth to be here much longer. Let’s make a change! It wouldn’t hurt the world to show a little more love. X M”

Yeah! It sucks when entertainers can’t rock out! Like, God! What’s your problem? So what if it looks like an underage girl is experimenting with faux-lesbianism on a television show that will no doubt be seen all over the world! Like, who gives?! Just let her entertain and rock out.