19Megan Fox Potentially Hulks Her Way Into A New Movie Role

Hot on the heels of her success in Transformers, Megan Fox is being pursued to star in the new She-Hulk movie.  A studio source says this:   “She-Hulk comics are popular so it’s only natural that the character makes the transition to the big screen.  The idea is to make She-Hulk sexier but even more savage than the Hulk, which is why Megan is the big favorite for the lead role. She’ll be green of course and will have to hang on to a few more pieces of clothes than the male version when she transforms!”

Oh my God, how much is this movie going to suck?  Who wants to see all the hotness that is Megan Fox turn green and bust out of her clothes?  Sure, Fox unclad sounds appealing at first blush, but she’s going to have huge guns and bulging eyes.

Can we just start taking bids on opening weekend box office receipts?  I’m going with $7M.

April 10, 2009 at 10:08 am by Wendie

35These Boots Were Made For Talking…About.

I know Beet will beat me, but I must be true to myself.  I don’t get all the Lindsay Lohan footwear love.  I just do not.  It seems like she just has forty pairs of the same black leather boots to match her seventy-eight pairs of black leggings and her six John DeLorean tribute collector’s edition coke spoons.

However, Megan Fox was seen yesterday in curly hair (love!) and boots so substantially more fuckable than anything I have ever seen on Lindsay Lohan’s unevenly suntanned person.

How soon before I can expect that there will be a knockoff version on Zappos?

March 31, 2009 at 10:37 am by Wendie

18Guess What Time It Is, Kids

Hard to believe it’s that time of the month again, but like breaking open a new pack of Yaz, it’s time for March’s installment of Brian Austin Green and Megan Fox broke up.

I don’t really have the energy to come with a new and creative way to spoon this information out to you all, so can we just get this over with?  God, this feels like the goodbye sex you never want to have.  Like, where you’re totally over the dude but you feel obligated to give him the Sayonarascrew.

She moved out.  He’s devastated and crying.  They’ll be back together before this moon phase is over.  The end.

March 23, 2009 at 1:03 pm by Wendie

21Of Course Brian Austin Green and Megan Fox Are Still Together

Remember a few months ago when Beet called a moratorium on all Spencer Pratt/Heidi Montag items?  It has been a happier place around here since then, hasn’t it?  Well now these two fuckwits, Brian Austin Green and Megan Fox, may be the next on her list.

After numerous break up announcements, they’re back on.  Back on and actually never split up to begin with-just hit a “rough patch,” that they are working through in counseling.  Oh, these tortured souls.  Beauty, millions, and youth.  There’s not a therapist in the land that can help that couple work through landmines such as those.

Personally, I wish these two would just get on with the business of having a real break up so that Megan can start fucking David Spade.

March 10, 2009 at 9:01 am by Wendie

15Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green Split … Again

Is anyone else tired of hearing this story every two months?

I really hope it’s true this time. If nothing else, so that I don’t have to write it once again two months from now.

Megan Fox and BAG have reportedly broken up and called off their engagement.

“The relationship had run its course,” says an insider. “It’s completely amicable, and they are remaining friends.”

Whatever. I don’t have complete faith in this story until I hear it from one of them or one of their reps. Like I said, we hear this story every couple of months. I mean, the rest of the world knows that this relationship’ll never work, but Brian and Megan have been taking their sweet time in figuring that out.

February 24, 2009 at 1:05 pm by Evil Beet

42Will Megan Fox Be the New Lara Croft?

It’s official: they’re doing another Lara Croft film, and they’re doing it without Angelina.

Producers say they won’t be casting an actress for quite awhile, but the blogosphere seems convinced the role will go to mini-Angelina, Megan Fox.

Who else can you guys see in role?

It has to be Megan, right?

January 28, 2009 at 11:14 am by Evil Beet