Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Megan Fox

Megan Fox Apparently Took Interviewing Tips from Britney Spears

This? Is Megan Fox‘s latest interview with the long, drawn-out Armani campaign that she’s been pushing for something like eighteen months, now, at this point.

My favorite part of the interview? When Megan says that her favorite part of being pretty is when her stepson tells her that she’s beautiful. What a crock of saccharine-coated BS. You’re just not that all that nice, Megan.

Anyway, I guess if you’re not doing any movies or have any real projects in development, that you have to stay relevant somehow or another. A for effort, Megs, but I’m with Emily when I say that you’re just a poor man’s Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. Sorry, girl!

Kirstie Alley is Almost Ready to Wear Megan Fox’s Dresses

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Yup, if you can *believe it, Kirstie Alley and Megan Fox are nearly toe-to-toe in their dress sizes. Kirstie, who claims to have lost almost thirty-eight inches since her dramatic Dancing With the Stars weight loss, states that she’s almost down to a twenty-two inch waist, which is the same measurement for the VERY SLENDER Megan Fox. An interview with Life and Style reads:

After losing 60 pounds on Dancing With the Stars, Kirstie Alley is very close to accomplishing another goal – slipping into a sexy Ports 1961 dress. “My goal dress has a waist that’s 22 inches,” she shares with Life & Style. “I tried it on, and I can almost zip it up.” She plans to wear the dress on her Italian vacation in a few weeks. “I’ll be my target size by then,” she exclaims. That means the 60-year-old can soon start sharing clothes with sexy Megan Fox!

“I do have a 22-inch waist,” confesses the 25-year-old. Although the Jennifer’s Body star jokes that she has to starve herself to maintain her trim physique, the truth is that it takes a lot of hard work to stay that slim. “I did a lot of Pilates — an immense amount of Pilates,” Megan reveals. Kirstie is just as determined to keep the weight off. “I’ve been dancing almost every day since the show ended,” she confides. “I like all the Latin dancing. It’s the best exercise and the best cardio.”

I’m freaked.  I think she’s really almost convincing me.  I wonder if it’s some kind of psychological Pavlovian experiment where someone says “skinny,” we automatically associate it with “Kirstie Alley.” Next up on the list: the word “emaciated.” It’s coming, guys.

*By “believe it,” I clearly mean “are lucky enough to be that drunk this early on a Friday and have nothing better to fill your head with than mindless urban legends.”

I’d Hate to Have Megan Fox as a Sister or Even a Friend

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Apparently, though, we all can’t be as lucky as the rest of us are, because this perfectly lovely and adorable girl IS Megan Fox‘s sister, and what’s worse is that she was seen out with her. I’m telling you right now, that if Megan Fox were MY sister, I’d never go anywhere with her. Megan Fox would make me look frumpy, dumpy, bloated, and adolescent, whereas she, next to a ‘normal’ girl, would look even more flawless than she already does.

Do us a favor, Megan – don’t hang out with the ‘regular’ people in public, and start doing things with your Hollywood peers. Then maybe we won’t feel so sorry for ourselves I won’t feel so sorry for myself.