Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Liza Minelli

Liza Minnelli Is About to Have A Comeback!

I know, you guys, I’m really excited about this too.

After that glorious appearance on the Home Shopping Network to sell some clothes from her new fashion line, she’s been receiving a ton of job offers.  According to The National Enquirer

“She’s already been presented with a reality show concept and a sitcom script with her playing a wacky grandma,” said a source close to Liza. “Her handlers are comparing it the recent resurgence of Betty White’s career. It’s the last thing Liza or her people expected, but they’re not complaining. They’re busy fielding offers.”

Oh, please let Liza follow in the footsteps of Betty White.  I would love nothing more than for her to host Saturday Night Live. She’d forget lines all over the place and just improv the whole thing because she’d be running on natural hilarity and a handful of painkillers.  And we all know it’s just a matter of time before she makes an appearance on Glee.  Let’s get this show on the road, Liza!

On a more personal note, I found it kind of shocking how much Liza reminds me of my grandmother in that HSN video. Seriously, exchange her outfit for a muumuu, dye her hair some ridiculous shade of burgundy, then give her a beer and toss her on the front porch of a house in a meth ghetto in Tennessee, and that is my grandmother.  Crazy.

Through Age-Processing Image Technology, We Can Now See What Hilary Duff And Vanessa Hudgens Will Look Like In 2049


Last night was the 2009 Tony Awards Meet the Press Reception.  I mean, really, there are so darn many reasons to party.  I’m having some friends over for lunch this Saturday but “having some friends over for lunch” sounds sooo boring.  I’m thinking of something like Midday Sandwich Soiree  Or, the National Institute of Barbecue 2009 Afternoon Gala.  What do you think?

Lots of the oldies but goodies were there like Dolly Parton, Liza Minelli, Jane Fonda…oh…and Martha Plimpton.  Yes, you may not have known this, but she went totally Mennonite now that she’s the ripe old age of thirty-nine.  Nothing but knee-length skirts and librarian blouses for her.

I don’t know if it was a matter of poor lighting, but when Constantine-remember him from American Idol?-looks presentable, something is wrong.

Michael Feinstein and Terrence Flannery Wed

Singer and pianist Michael Feinstein married his longtime love Terrence Flannery last night at their home in Los Angeles.  The ceremony was officiated by Judge Judy and Gabriel Ferrer aka Mr. Debby Boone.  I love Hollywood weddings!  With a guest list that included Liza Minnelli, Barry Manilow and Joan Collins, the event was basically the stereotypical gay man fantasy personified.

As a sidenote, I don’t know who told Feinstein that wearing an athletic stripe tuxedo was ok.  But it isn’t.  Ever.

Link It Up

A day with Paula Abdul is not worth $26,000 to anyone. A day with her Vicodin supply? Now that’s another story. [CelebSlam]

Nicole Richie doesn’t like it when strangers text message her. [Drunken Stepfather]

Scary Spice is carrying Eddie Murphy’s love child. [Juicy-News]

Check out the video from Christina Aguilera’s new single, “Hurt,” which comes complete with a father-daughter separation scene straight out of a Michael Lohan cartoon. [Hollywood Gossip Whores]

Before they became the alcoholic, abusive, herpetic mess we all took such pure joy in watching them become, Liza Minelli and David Gest filmed a pilot for a reality show. Because God loves you, this footage has surfaced. [Perez Hilton]

Ellen Degeneres invites a hyptonist on her show for a weepy attempt to rid herself of the smoking habit, the cumulative result of which is that now I want a cigarette. [Defamer]