Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Lindsay Lohan

Last Lindsay Post of the Day, Promise: The Fight Was All Over a Boy Band-Boy

photo of lindsay lohan red hair and drunk pictures
I could just roll over and die. No joke. Roll over. and die. From TMZ:

Lindsay Lohan punched another woman in the face over Max from the boy band “The Wanted” last night … and we’ve learned Max was turned off by the fact LiLo was sloppy drunk inside the club … this according to sources at the club.

We’re told … Lindsay went to the Justin Bieber concert — but not to see the Biebs — “The Wanted” was the opening act … and Lindsay has been scoping Max out for the last few days.

Sources say Lindsay tried to get backstage after the concert to see him — but she was blocked. Fast forward to later that evening when Lindsay met up with Max, Jay and Tom at a hotel bar.

The four of them — along with one of LiLo’s friends — then went to the club Avenue together.

As the evening wore on, we’re told Lindsay got drunker and drunker … and it turned Max off. He then started talking to another woman, which enraged Lindsay. That woman is the one Lindsay is accused of battering. (FYI — Max was also really drunk).

Ironically, Max washed his hands of both of them — found another girl in the club — and went home with her instead … while Lindsay ended up in jail.

Oh my gosh, yes, because guys who aren’t totally trashy like her Royal Highness Lindsay, tell me: isn’t it just the hottest when a girl you’re not even interested in punches another girl you’re not even interested in, in the face? Doesn’t that just totally ring your bell?

Here’s a photo of this Max person, a person with whom I’m not at all familiar, because I don’t do bands like The Wanted mostly:

photo of max the wanted pictures

UPDATED: Here’s a Video of Lindsay’s Arrest, Also, the Chick She Decked


Best part of the video? How she keeps repeating, “Are you kidding me?” as if it’s totally OK in some parallel universe to punch someone in the face even if they do the unthinkable and enter your personal, private space. “Are you kidding me”, Lindsay Lohan? No, I don’t think you are, but alas, you apparently need the education that it’s never OK to lay your hands on someone because U MAD.

And here’s the lady, too:

photo of lindsay lohan pictures
Last, if you thought this incident would pass by discreetly, without Michael Lohan throwing his two cents in, then you’d be just as delusional as Lindsay. No, this is what Michael had to say:

“I told you exactly what would happen and was trying to get Dina on board with me for a long time but especially the last two weeks. If she had, I wish to God, she would stop and resolve things with us to do the same for our children. It’s really sad that the same good people are always there for her and the ones that care are the ones she hurts the most. She is in a dark place, it’s in God’s hands and I hope he deals with her appropriately.”

God, how is it that Michael Lohan ends up looking the best out of all the people in this entire damn family? How is this even real?

Image courtesy of Splash News

Update: Lindsay’s been charged with three additional crimes on the west coast, bringing today’s grand total to four criminal charges. Yup, remember that car accident back in June? Well a Santa Monica County Judge is charging Lindsay with providing false information to a police officer, obstruction of justice, and reckless driving. Oh my God, what a f-cking mess. For Lindsay. For those who say it’s time for her comeuppance (i.e., pretty much everyone else?), here it comes, riding on a big crack train.

Lindsay Lohan Just Got Arrested

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

But wait. It wasn’t even for the other thing we thought she was going to get arrested for, the thing where she lied to the police about her car accident. No, this is a totally new issue. She just got into a fight at a club. And she’s at the police station right now.

From TMZ:

Lindsay Lohan was ARRESTED at 4 AM Thursday in New York City for allegedly punching a woman at a New York City nightclub … law enforcement sources tell TMZ.

Our sources say Lohan was at Club Avenue when she got into some sort of argument with a female patron and it became physical.  We’re told cops came and arrested Lindsay for allegedly assaulting her.

Law enforcement tells us prior to the fight words were exchanged between Lindsay and the woman as they sat in separate booths near each other.  Lindsay said something to the effect of, “Give me my space.”  Some time passed and then, for some reason, Lindsay allegedly punched the girl in the left side of her face.

We’re told by the time cops arrived Lindsay had left the club and was a passenger in a car that was leaving the area.  Cops intercepted the car and made the arrest.

At the time of this post Lindsay is still at the police station.

And this isn’t Lindsay’s only legal problem.  TMZ broke the story … she is about to be charged with lying to cops in June after her car accident on Pacific Coast Highway.  She told them she was a passenger in the Porsche when actually she was driving.

And, if Lindsay is formally charged with the latest crime, it could trigger yet another probation violation.

Apparently she’s getting booked for third degree misdemeanor assault, which is neat.

This is it, you guys. She’s definitely going back to jail. That’s not in a report or anything, that’s just a gut feeling. And yeah, I’m excited for her to get another chance to perfect her mug shot, ha ha, but I really just hope that she can learn her lesson this time. Any chance of that, do you think?

Nobody Even Watched Liz & Dick

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

Did you watch Liz & Dick? I didn’t. I know, I know, but I don’t have cable, and it was so cold on Sunday, so I just went to bed. I have seen clips, but I haven’t seen the whole thing yet, so I can’t really pass judgement on it. I can only pass on the facts.

The ratings weren’t too hot on this one. Sorry. Everyone involved with the making of this movie predicted that every single person with access to a television would watch Liz & Dick to see Lindsay‘s big comeback, but yeah, that just wasn’t the case. They got 3.5 million viewers, which certainly isn’t bad, it just isn’t what they expected.

Let’s put this into perspective: Lindsay’s movie was the fourth most-watched Lifetime movie of 2012. It got 3.5 million viewers. Lifetime’s remake of Steel Magnolias had 6.5 million viewers, a movie called Drew Peterson: Untouchable got 5.8 million, and another movie called Abducted: The Carlina White Story got 4.09 million. I can understand why Steel Magnolias did so much better – Queen Latifah, Phylicia Rashad, and Jill Scott, are you serious? – but I don’t get the other two. Are other people really that uninterested in Lindsay Lohan?

Lindsay Lohan is Actually Not Happy About All This Negativity

photo of lindsay lohan and grant bowler pictures
So most of you disagreed with me when I said that I thought ‘Liz & Dick’ was actually pretty likable, and some of you (well, not *you*, per se, but Twitter people) actually went as far as … well, practically eviscerating Lindsay for trying her … well, for trying really hard in her latest film endeavor. With that in mind, I’ve got some good news for those of you who who are keen on hating on what she does on the premise of who she is: she’s devastated. That’s right, you heard—devastated. A source close to Lindsay had this to say about all of the negative feedback that’s come in over the last twelve hours from the first public viewing of ‘Liz & Dick’:

“Lindsay is devastated by the response to the film. She has got used to all the negative press around her personal life but this is the first time she has experienced it about her work. No matter how bad things were going for her personally, everyone would always agree that she was a great actress. … Lindsay has already read her own press. She knew the script wasn’t strong but thought she would bring the role of Elizabeth to life. This is particularly heartbreaking as her acting was the only thing in her life that she knew was real. Now she is doubting that, too.”

But this “only thing she thought was real” thing? Well. That’s an indicator of someone deluded beyond all belief right there, and also someone so far up their own ass for their own good, to boot—but hopefully, if this all really is the case, it’ll jar girlfriend right out of the self-induced ‘Parent Trap’ reverie she put herself in all those years ago and maybe—just maybe—she can work her way out of it and see what a wreck things really have been all this time (except for ‘Liz & Dick’; it’s the most amount of right that she’s done in a long, long time). Here’s what Michael Lohan had to say about his daughter’s performance:

“Due to the content, I had to step away from a lot of the scenes, but regardless of what some of these so-called critics, who don’t have an ounce of talent in their bones say, Lindsay proved that she is an amazing actress. This was a different role for her at a difficult time of her life. She still has what it takes to be the Lindsay Lohan that is one of Hollywood’s top actresses.”

I know we’ve ragged on Lindsay a lot in the past, and still continue to do so, although more of it’s tongue-in-cheek as of late, but God. Never have we ever said that we hate her or that she’s entirely worthless like so many other media outlets have, because seriously, when all’s said and done, she is still a person, am I right? And no, not at all worthless. Suffice it to say I haven’t forgotten all of the f-ckery that Lindsay’s created in her own life, but damn. Cut a girl a break, maybe. Or, at the very least, help her cut herself a break somehow or another*.

*Preferably with nothing that has anything to do with jewelry heists, former lesbian lovers, or family matters. Let’s be fair, now.

Now Lindsay Wants Her Own Sitcom

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

It’s happening. Hollywood’s darling (ha ha) is shooting for the moon. Drunk off the success or whatever from her big Lifetime movie, Lindsay Lohan is interested in prolonging her comeback with her very own television show!

From Radar:

Even though critics raked Lindsay Lohan over the coals for her performance in the Lifetime television movie Liz & Dick, the former child actress is determined to star in her own television sitcom, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

“Lindsay has asked her manager and agent to look into getting her her own television sitcom,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com exclusively. “Lindsay feels that the small screen would be a great way for her to revitalize her acting career and that a comedy would be the best bet. Lindsay feels most comfortable doing comedy and it was Charlie Sheen that told her she should do it. Charlie told Lindsay that it was an easy way to make very good money and help her to get her movie career back on track. Lindsay is loving the idea of having her own sitcom and would love to play someone in a story based on her crazy life.”

Oh, and here’s another lovely tidbit from the source:

“Lindsay isn’t fazed at all by the criticism. She thinks everyone is insanely jealous of her, and like it or not, she was trending on Twitter last night. Lindsay hopes that she could get her own television sitcom like Kirstie Alley did with Fat Actress. Lindsay admires what Kirstie did and wants to follow in her footsteps,” the insider says.

Do we really even need to discuss this? This is already in the works, right? Because I want to live in a world where Lindsay Lohan can say “I want a sitcom” and then instantly get a sitcom. I want to live in a world where people care about what I care about, where my wants and needs are taken into account. And I both want and need a Lindsay Lohan sitcom. In order for me to thrive as a human being, I need that.

Can we get a premiere date or something now?

Oh My God, ‘Liz & Dick’

photo of liz & dick pictures
You don’t know how many times I wrote and re-wrote this post in my head, guys, because no matter what I said or how I said it, it was completely unbelievable and preposterous, so I’m just going to come out with it: did you watch ‘Liz & Dick’ last night? Because I did. In its entirety. And short of thinking that the film’s soundtrack was busted ass (it was), and that they completely rushed the ending to fit it into a two-hour block … ugh, here goes I guess—I loved it. I LOVED it. I actually thought it was so, so much better than everyone (including myself) said it was going to be, and I couldn’t turn it off (not that I wanted to, but that’s a moot point).

Here’s some general Twitter feedback about the movie, but you know what? I honestly think a lot of it’s from people who just want something cute and amusing to say in order to get mentioned on blogs and newspapers (well played, crafty ones). I’ll bet you that some of these naysayers actually liked this movie as much as I did:

Gilbert Godfried sound more like Liz Taylor #LizAndDick

Just turned on #LizAndDick after The Walking Dead. The walkers have more charisma and screen presence than Lindsey Lohan.

I want to kill them already???? #lizanddick

Somewhere, there is an actress who didn’t get cast in this thing and is thanking her lucky stars. #LizAndDick

Holy God in heaven… #LizandDick is pure torture.

Watched 3 minutes of Liz&Dick and had to turn it off. This coming from the white girl who sat thru the entirety of Norbit, sober #lizanddick

Come on. Come on! It wasn’t that bad! You know, I recorded it on my DV-R last night, just in case it was so bad that I had to take it in two doses, but now I’m glad I went and decided to do that, because yes, I will absof-ckinglutely be watching it again. It was compelling in a weird, suprising, not-at-all-awful sort of way.

As for the technical aspects of the movie, the wardrobe was pretty killer. The scenery … well, it wasn’t all that bad. The only thing that I wasn’t fond of was the fact that it was written as if you knew Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton’s life story as it were, and frankly, some people just don’t (shocking, I know). Honestly, that’s my only gripe. I really, really enjoyed the movie, and there’s something a bit proud (?) inside of me for Lindsay Lohan somewhere, too.