Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan’s sister Ali wants to be the next Dolly Parton

ali lohan dina lohan

Please try not to throw up in your morning coffee, but Lindsay Lohan‘s “younger” sister, Ali Lohan, apparently wants to become a country singer now. She’s done the modeling thing (and the 5,000 cosmetic surgeries that come with it, apparently?) and now she’s ready to move on to music.

From TMZ:

We’re told Ali — who was last seen trying to launch a career as a NYC fashion model — has been writing songs and working with a singing coach.

We’re told Ali and mom Dina, went to Nashville last month to meet with producers and soak up the hillbilly vibe. She’s also learning to play different musical instruments.

Ali is not without success … she’s already snagged a $120K contract offer from one label — which also includes business roles for Dina … and Ali’s dad, Michael.   Couldn’t see that coming, right?

But Ali’s not committing … she thinks she can do even better so she’s meeting with other music execs.

Uh, what’s label’s this with, Crack Pipe Records? I’m sorry, but I just can’t with anyone in this family. Have Dina and Michael realized that the well has run dry with the older daughter, who will smoke and snort every penny she earns (if she ever even earns it), so they’ve had to move on to pimping out the younger one? Fuck off.

Also, Dolly Parton looks younger than Ali Lohan. Just saying.

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Lindsay Lohan “never wanted to be a celebrity”

Front Row: Day 2 -  London Collections: Men SS15

Lindsay Lohan is desperate for fame, fortune and attention from any direction she can get it. She’s so keen on being “back on set” that she continues to shit all over anyone who is actually dumb enough to give her a 3,985th chance. She’s “willing to work”, sure, but that’s what it’s all about – the work. She never actually wanted to be a celebrity, according to her.

From BBC News:

“People have certain perceptions of me. For a long time, people looked at me as kind of a celebrity, which is something I never wanted. That’s not what I got into this industry for.”

“I’ve been doing this since I was 3 years old and I’ve been on set since I was 6. People kind of forgot that, and I think now is a good time. And what better than to do it with the great people that I’m working with on stage in London … so that people can focus on the fact that I’m in this industry because I’m an actress and an artist and not just someone you take photos of?”

Lindsay also claimed that she’s constantly paranoid now and that her friends think she’s neurotic because she’s so jumpy. You know, because that’s not all the cocaine or anything.

“My friends think I’m neurotic,” she said, “but I will hear a flash of an iPhone camera, I will hear the shutter from a mile across the room. I will feel it.”

The star added social media was allowing her to regain control of her image.

When a US tabloid published a picture of her with cuts and scratches on her leg last week, she posted a similar image on Instagram, explaining she had fallen off a bike.

“[They said] that I’d cut myself purposefully, which was dark,” she said. “I have siblings. People see that. Producers see that and I don’t need people having that perception of me.

“The benefit of something like Instagram is I can use that to my advantage and I can say ‘look, this is what happened’ and make light of the situation because it was actually kind of funny.

“If I give the shot first, then there’s no shot to get.”

LOL, okay. “Producers see that.” Uh, no producers are paying attention to you, anymore, girl. You blew that shit years ago. And as for you trying to set the record straight, so to speak, via your Instagram account, no one’s buying that, either. God, the levels of delusion here are unrivaled.

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Lindsay Lohan Says She’s “Willing To Work”

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Lindsay Lohan was rumored to be missing rehearsals and/or showing up late to the London production of Speed-the-Plow. But she swears that’s not true and what’s more, she’s not going to miss any performances, because she’s “willing to work.” From Broadway World:

When asked if she would be missing shows or rehearsals, Lohan stated, “That’s not going to happen. That’s not on the cards. It’s not. I’m at a place in my life where I like the commitment. I’m looking forward to that part of it.”

[...]

She hopes her West End appearance will rehabilitate her public image.

She stated, “I want to be known for my talents and my work that I create, rather than a tabloid sensation. However long it does take, I’m willing to do it. I’m willing to work for it.”

In any other profession if you told someone you’re “willing to work” they would say, “Well, yeah, duh.” But because she’s Lindsay Lohan and she’s a troubled actress, her being “willing to work” is news. Cracks me up. Way to go, Lohan. Hope this is what you dreamed of.

BTW the site also posted this graphic — I don’t know if it’s the play’s official poster or just a pic for the article, but either way, it’s pretty bad:

lindsay-lohan-speed-the-plow

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