A pretty funny video from X17, as the paparazzi follow LiLo around for the better part of a day. She eats at Il Fornaio with Harry Morton and a woman who is either a rookie personal assistant or a very entitled friend.
Before Lindsay leaves the restaurant, this mystery woman comes out and instructs the paparazzi that she “needs them to stay at least ten feet back.” The paparazzi chirp their agreement — “yes yes, no problem, of course, sure, you got it” — and, confident her natural genius for paparazzi negotiation has once again worked its subtle magic, she heads back inside the restaurant.
She emerges later with Lindsay, who is instantly clobbered by photogs.
I wish people would leave this sort of work where it belongs, with the bloggers.
Jane Fonda, who is famous, as best I can recall, for workout tapes referenced by Sir Mix-a-Lot and doing something that upset some people during the Vietnam war (I was never much for history), has apparently turned recently to acting, costarring opposite La Lohan in the defining deep-South-blow-job film of our generation, Georgia Rule.
“I think every once in a while, a very, very young person who is burning both ends of the candle needs to have somebody say, `You know, you’re going to pay the piper, you better slow down.’ So I think it was good,” she says. “She parties all the time…and you know, she’s young and she can get away with it. But, you know, it’s hard after a while to party very hard and work very hard. She learned that, I hope.”
Fonda also had some nice things to say. “I just want to take her in my arms and hold her until she becomes grown-up. She’s so young and she’s so alone out there in the world in terms of structure and, you know, people to nurture her. And she’s so talented.”
Because if I can’t blog about the retarded shit celebs did today, the terrorists have already won.
- David Spade and Heather Locklear are dunzo; her latest boy-toy is a Colorado realtor with a striking resemblance to Joe Simpson. But I adore her, so I’m setting down my bat and walking away from the soft ball.
- Sean “Puff Daddy/P. Diddy/Diddy” Combs has to ditch the “Diddy” in Britain after a music producer there sues him over the name.
- Dana Plato’s son files a wrongful death suit againt the Diff’rent Strokes star’s former fiance. Time to update that True Hollywood Story, E!
- Black Eyed Peas singer Stacy “Fergie” Ferguson reluctantly admits to being on meth and Kids Incorporated. I’m pretty sure I know which one is more damaging to her image.
- For those of you who were staying up nights wondering, Lindsay Lohan’s stolen-and-returned Birkin bag had nothing missing. Except, you know, probably the drugs.
Ugh. I am, like, soooo late on the draw with this one. So a recap.
Lindsay Lohan’s Birkin was stolen at Heathrow airport, which was, like, recently the target of some manner of foiled terrorist plot, so it’s nice to see they’ve really driven security into high gear over there. Lindsay cried because if there’s anything that sucks worse than losing a Hermes bag containing over $1M in jewelry and your asthma inhaler, it’s losing a Hermes bag containing over $1M in jewelry and the rest of your cocaine. You’d cry, too.
Don’t panic yet, folks; the bag was recently found in a parking lot near Heathrow, after whoever stole it realized that it’s a lot harder to sell jewelry and a handbag on the black market when everyone in the nearest 19 countries knows you stole them from Lindsay Lohan this morning. But you know what tastes the same in every language? Yeah. Don’t count on getting that “inhaler” back, Linds.