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Lindsay Lohan

13Paris Hates Lindsay

Paris and Lindsay are Over

I know we’re not talking about it… but did anyone catch the cold shoulder LL got from our gal?

Larry King asked about Lohan and Paris said curtly “I know her.” Then, Larry King asked if Paris would visit a friend in rehab and Paris responded “I don’t have any friends in rehab.” Yikes. You hate to see friendships sour. Luckily Paris still has much love for B-Spears.

Lastly, the funniest comment of the night was Larry King’s outro: “Thanks for joining us Paris. Tomorrow night, former Secretary of State Colin Powell is on the show.” Frankly, I don’t know how Larry made that transition without killing one of his producers.

June 27, 2007 at 9:26 pm by Spiteful Lars

2Lindsay Lohan’s Dad (Well, At Least His Publicist) Can’t Spell Her Name

Lindsay Lohan’s Dad Spells Her Name Wrong, Misspells As Lyndsay, in Statement

After battling ex-wife Dina Lohan in court to get visitation rights with his children, Michael Lohan issued the following statement:

“I look forward to order being restored to the chaos that our family life has become. Lyndsay, Michael, Ali and Cody need stability and both of their parents in their lives. I am anxious to spend time with them and end this cruel, needless separation.”
— Michael Lohan

For additional info or to speak with Michael contact the following:

Leslie Kellner Taylor
Big Machine Media
575 Lexington Ave.; 4th Floor
New York, NY 10022
Ph: [REDACTED]

This statement has everyone up in arms, because, of course, Lindsay’s name is not spelled “Lyndsay,” and, as her father, he should probably know this.

Look, I’m not about to throw my full support behind Michael “Shoe Assault” Lohan, but I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess that the misspelling is the fault of one Leslie Kellner Taylor, who was all too happy to sign her work.

June 27, 2007 at 8:34 am by Evil Beet

6Lindsay Lohan Would Prefer Not to Share Her Released-From-Captivity Week with Paris Hilton

Lindsay Lohan Will Stay in Rehab Longer Than a Month

At least I figure that’s the explanation for these rumors that Lindsay will be staying in rehab longer than originally planned. No one knows exactly when Paris will be released from the slammer, but it will probably be sometime early next week, and LiLo was supposed to leave Promises at the end of this week. But apparently she’s changed her plans.

“She is staying in Promises for longer than a month,” says a source close to Lindsay. “We don’t know how much longer because of her work schedule, but she is taking rehab very seriously this time and not messing around.”

Now, the humanitarian buried deep within my cold, evil heart wants to believe that this is true — that it has occurred to Lindsay that perhaps 28 days in rehab is not nearly long enough to untangle 20 years of fuck-upedness, and that experience would suggest that catapulting her back into the real world after such a short time period will inevitably result in her inability to stay sober, and that she really, truly wants to put her life in order this time around.

But, you know, my experience suggests otherwise.

I’ve gotta admit, though, with Paris in jail and Lindsay in rehab and Britney friendly with her family again, it’s been a really, really slow news week. Traffic’s been lagging. And, try as she might, Tara Reid just can’t hold down Camp Trainwreck by herself these days. This rehabilitation bullshit is costing me money, people. It’s not that I don’t want you to get sober, Lindsay, it’s just that I’d prefer it if you were sober while leaving Hyde in some manner of LA-tastic outfit with a D-list British model and calling Paris Hilton a cunt to X17. Is that really so unfair of me?

June 20, 2007 at 9:04 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan

2Lindsay Lohan Gets Sued Yet Again

Lindsay Back in Rehab

We’ve always wondered, is this Lohan kid going to make it as an actress? The answer becomes more cloudy by the day, but one thing is for certain — the gal is great at getting sued. Check this noise out: Lohan Sued Again Over 2005 Car Crash.

Now that’s just sad. It’s the “again” that really chokes me up here. The really bad news is that this lawsuit isn’t for a measly $3624. Oh no, my friends, she’s looking at a bill of (drumroll please):

The lawsuit, which seeks at least $200,000 in damages, also named The Ivy restaurant as a defendant, claiming its staff gave Lohan alcoholic drinks even though she was under the legal drinking age.

Delightful! I don’t believe a third lawsuit can come out of this, but you never know. We’ll keep you informed either way.

June 15, 2007 at 1:06 pm by Spiteful Lars
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan

27Everyone’s in the Business of Selling out Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan Cocaine Nicole Richie

The latest to hop on the cash-in-on-Lindsay’s-addiction bandwagon is former bodyguard Lee Weaver, who’s currently writing a memoir about his time with Lindsay (she didn’t make him sign an NDA?) and sold a few juicy tidbits to News of the World, which has officially cornered the market on Lindsay Lohan’s drug addiction. There’s a lot of good stuff in the article, including a full-on hair-pulling fight with Jessica Simpson and the attempted assault of a drug dealer, but here are some other highlights:

She had a total death wish and took more drugs and drank more than anyone I’ve met. I lost count of the times I thought she was overdosing and had to carry her out of parties. Every morning I’d breathe a sigh of relief she was still alive.

She used boys for drugs and girls for thrills. I lost count of the women she took back to her hotel room from clubs.

I even saw her try to grope Mariah Carey’s bottom and boobs one night as they danced. One time I went to look for her in a club bathroom and found her in the corner French-kissing a girl.

Nobody was as wild as Lindsay. But Nicole came close. Sometimes Paris Hilton would be there but the most I saw her do was drink and strip. One night Lindsay and Nicole were making trip after trip to the bathroom — she wouldn’t snort in front of me because she knew I’d get mad. But the more wasted they got the less she cared. In the end they carried in a mirror from the bedroom, laid it on the coffee table and emptied a mountain of coke onto it. They went at the stuff with straws, hoovering it all up then piling more on. I tried to tell Lindsay to stop but she just told me it was cool. After ten hours I’d had enough and threatened to throw the mirror out of the window. I had to carry her out to the car.

He also tossed in some new pics of Linday being drunk and half-naked. Fun.

Lindsay Lohan Drunk Coked Up Nicole Richie Lindsay Lohan Bodyguard Cocaine Picture

June 11, 2007 at 11:16 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan

595Remember When?

16407-lindsay-lohan-sex-e-screensaver.jpg

Want something a little sexier than this?

Be sure to check out our nip slip gallery and our upskirt/labia slip gallery.

Last night I watched “Mean Girls” for the first time in a while and I was struck by something…Lindsay Lohan used to be so naturally beautiful. She has a smoking body in the movie and is lovely and fresh-faced.

I was actually a Lohan fan after this movie and since then her professional and personal life has really tanked. I think she is a cautionary tale for all those young cute celebrities. No matter how young you are hard living is going to age you.

If something works don’t fix it.

June 8, 2007 at 9:21 am by EvilT
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan