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Lindsay Lohan

3AP Pulls Paris Hilton and the Elephants Story!

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Hooray!!!

Remember how I was all upset because I promised God that if the Paris Hilton and the drunken elephants quote was real I’d stop encouraging Lindsay Lohan to drink again and then it was real because the AP picked it up??

The AP has pulled it!!!

The quote is not real.

God loves me so much. He was just playing a funny game with me for a day there. Ha ha, God. You’re such a riot.

DRINK, LINDSAY!!!!!!!!!!

(Paris is back in the US now, running around promoting her Can Can fragrance.)

Hey, did I mention Lindsay Lohan should drink again? Because she’s BORING AS FUCK when she’s sober? Drink, bitch!

Thanks Brittiany!

November 14, 2007 at 8:44 am by Evil Beet

3La Lohan Starts Community Service

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Lindsay Lohan started doing the community service work she has to do as part of her DUI plea deal. She’s working at the American Red Cross in the LA area, and she put in 7 hours yesterday.

The pictures from this event are boring, as is everything Lindsay does lately.

Unfortunately, I can’t publicly encourage her to drink anymore, because I promised God that if the Paris Hilton drunken elephants quote was real, I’d quit doing that. The AP picked up the story this morning, so I guess it’s real. And a deal’s a deal. So, um, good for you, Lindsay. Way to be boring and not help me make any money. Thanks hon.

November 13, 2007 at 8:37 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan

3Sobriety Is Boring

Lindsay Lohan Upskirt with Panties

Yes, Lindsay, we know.

You’re all sober now.

You wear panties.

This is not good for my traffic.

Come on, baby.

Show us some snatch.

November 12, 2007 at 11:49 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan

8What Is With the Handcuffs Necklaces?

Christine Lakin in Handcuffs Necklace, Pictures, Photos

Here’s Christine Lakin — the chick who played Al on Step by Step — at some MTV event wearing the infamous Lindsay Lohan handcuffs necklace.

Who makes these things?

What do they mean?

Why is everyone wearing them?

Somebody, please explain!!!

November 8, 2007 at 10:48 am by Evil Beet

3I Like Lindsay Lohan’s New Boyfriend

Riley Giles Offers Dina Lohan Advice on His MySpace Blog

On Monday, Riley Giles posted this on his MySpace blog:

ADVICE OF THE WEEK: if your a mom, with 4 kids, the best thing u can do for them right now is have a reality show. WE. DO. NOT. WANT. she had the nerve to ask us to be on. no thanks!

Oooh, ouch!

Doesn’t it sting when a 25-year-old snowboarder fresh out of rehab is offering you parenting advice, Dina? And he’s right?

Ouch. Ouch, ouch, ouch.

November 6, 2007 at 1:13 pm by Evil Beet

9SOBER! (No, Seriously)

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Lindsay Lohan spends an exciting Friday night going to the hair salon.

She looks amazing!

She looks happy!

She looks sober!

Yay, Lindsay!! We may have a bona fide rehabbed starlet on our hands, now, kids.

November 4, 2007 at 1:47 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Lindsay Lohan