Do any of you follow LeAnn Rimes on Twitter? I do. Ever since she started blasting her current-boyfriend’s ex-wife and vice versa, I found it to be some pretty good entertainment for rainy days and days where I have no desire to get out of bed. That’s when I started following her, and I’ve found some pretty great gems of wisdom buried within all of the ‘I love Eddie Cibrian 4-ever’ and ‘Mrs. Eddie Cibrian (AKA the normal one)’ and ‘Eddie-Weddie + LeAnn = Tru Luv.’ Last night, LeAnn put up quite a doozy, and I thought it was totally shareable:
“A good friend just told me that the key to a successful marriage was to argue naked! I’m gonna do that from now on, when that rarely happens.”
OK, first of all. ‘When that rarely happens.’ Anyone who claims that they ‘rarely’ argue is trying to cover up the fact that THEY ARGUE LOTS. Seriously. I’m not saying that anyone who says that is lying, because there are couples who rarely argue, but anyone who FEELS the need to announce that publicly has got some serious self-esteem issues and you KNOW this bitch just needs constant reassurance about her relationship with Squint ‘n Grin Ed.
Second? I don’t know if any of you guys are, or have been in, long-term relationships, but pulling the nudity card to get out of trouble, or distract your significant other from the reality of the situation just generally doesn’t WORK after the first year or so. I don’t care how hot your body is – if you failed to unload the dishwasher after dinner because you wanted to play online Jenga or whatever, no amount of nudity is going to distract me from BEING ANGRY. Or, you know, whatever.
Sorry, LeAnn, I generally think you’re alright, if not a bit flighty, self-centered, and naive, but come on. Let’s get with the program here and realize that if you keep exposing your teeny-tiny body to Eddie for every little thing, there’s a good chance that you’re going to come home one day to find him shacked up – in your bed – with another emaciated blonde woman who looks nothing like you. And then, girlfriend? If you start taking your clothes off in order to argue? Well, that might be a little weird.
March 31, 2011 at 5:30 am by Sarah
Here’s a pretty good ‘before-and-after’ photo of LeAnn from the time that she said that she DIDN’T lose weight to the current time. I mean, the picture kind of speaks for itself – you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure this one out: LeAnn Rimes lost weight. LeAnn Rimes actually lost a pretty FAIR AMOUNT of weight, and I’m not quite understanding her outcry over allegations that she’s LOST said weight.
I get that weight fluctuates – my God, I gained sixty pounds during pregnancy, took seventy-five off in the months after delivery, and put fifteen back on within a year. Weight happens, you know. But you can well bet that I didn’t deny gaining – or losing or gaining – that weight, especially when there were comparison photos in place to discredit my rantings. LeAnn claims that a regular breakfast for her consists of ‘poached eggs, whole wheat toast and Italian ham [with] fresh berries.’ Ham? What’s ham? Girl, if I even LOOK at ham, my legs turn INTO ham.
I get it: you lost weight, LeAnn. I’m glad you have something you consider ‘controversial’ to squawk about on your Twitter page these days, but come on. This just isn’t all that interesting. Just stay healthy.
March 17, 2011 at 5:30 am by Sarah
And you know what? Despite prior claims that LeAnn was a homewrecker, and Eddie is still lurking in the closet somewhere, I’m happy for these two crazy assholes. HAPPY, do you hear? I don’t know if it’s from the excess alcohol over the holidays, or if that damned Mrs. Claus get-up finally won me over, but I’m rooting for these guys today, and I’m rooting for them hard.
LeAnn’s rep came forward last night and confirmed that boyfriend Eddie had popped the question over the holidays:
“Yes, they were engaged over the holidays and are very happy.”
And you know what? Despite the fact that both of them apparently have a fat lot of baggage from previous relationships (what with Cibrian being married to that shrew for so long and LeAnn getting married when she was fourteen or whatever), they do seem both super happy and in love.
The ring, of course, is a stunner – it’s a 5 carat oval diamond in a gold fleur-de-lis setting. Insiders say that the couple designed the ring together, so they both knew this day would come, it was just a matter of time. (What, you think this couple would keep anything from each other, EVER? Come on.) Check the honker of a ring out here:
December 28, 2010 at 6:30 am by Sarah
Love it. It’s cute, you can tell she’s totally into Christmas, much like I am (no, seriously, I am probably the most into-Christmas-person you’ll ever meet – carols, volunteering for the local live Nativity, cookie baking weeks, wrapping presents, planning dinner menus, going to see lights, you name it – I’VE DONE IT ALL IN THE PAST THREE AND A HALF WEEKS, BITCHES). LeAnn took to her Twitter, naturally, to post the above photo for something Christmas-related in which she dressed up one of Mrs. Claus’s sexy alter-egos.
So yeah, apparently this is the post in which I brag about my mad Christmasing skills, but also the one in which I start a LeAnn Rimes pregnancy rumor. Super! Though girlfriend doesn’t look heavy by any means whatsoever, she sure is looking pretty sexy-curvy in that bust-and-hips area – and all first-time moms know that their bodies are smoking hot in the early months, what with all those crazy hormones filling out all the right places. Plus, she’s got that fabulous gleam in her eyes that doesn’t just have to do with Christmas. Calling it now, guys.
I know I’ve said it before, but … Damn, LeAnn.
December 21, 2010 at 8:00 am by Sarah
OK, apparently? This fall is the summer of revenge engagements. Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo first, then Jessica Simpson announces her engagement to whatever-his-name-is football player boyfriend. Didn’t, you know, seem odd or anything. These are two couples that are so in sync, guys, that they even come to the same rash decisions together. No harm, no foul.
Now, however, we have the engagement of Dean Sheremet, former backup dancer and ex-husband of LeAnn Rimes. Sheremet, who was rumored for the longest time to be gay, is now a New York City chef, and has admitted to popping the question to his photographer girlfriend, Sarah Silver. All of this comes in the wake of ‘Is LeAnn engaged? Is she not engaged? Does anyone actually give a shit?’
Naturally, LeAnn’s come forward to congratulate the couple, and she backtracks left and right, inventing imaginary people who are calling her congratulatory bluff:
Congrats to @deansheremet and @sarah_silver on your engagement! A little birdie told me the happy news last night. Wishes for a life full of happiness.
And later, the other half of Eddie Cibrian tweeted:
my congrats is from my heart. Sorry if you don’t understand it. I do not need the publicity, I get plenty. please stop passing [judgment].
Yeah, guys. Stop passing judgement on LeAnn Rimes. Your words cut her deep, don’t you know. Can’t someone just be happy for someone else without it being for show? Chuff and mutter, for fuck’s sake.
November 15, 2010 at 6:30 am by Sarah
Ok, I’ve about had it with the lack of “reporting” with E News. The fact that our “engagement” has spread so furiously over the past 24 hours off of an E News article that is 150% untrue just shows you the lack of credible “sources” they seem to find and build a story around. When CNN is calling my publicist off of a lie E News has reported, the media world seriously has a problem with their lack of responsibility to the public to actually report the truth. Even though this is positive “news” its not true. Imagine all the negative “true stories” they’ve reported over the last year that aren’t true either. Gina Serpe and especially, Whitney English reporting for E News should be investigated for their lack of “investigative reporting.”Eddie and I are beyond happy and in love and look forward to one day sharing such private news with you all and hopefully will be able to enjoy it privately and share it with our family and friend’s before the world knows (contrary to reports on our intentions). So, nothing has been “exclusively” broken E News except maybe some of your credibility, sorry…I’M PREGNANT TOO!!! LOL Thanks to all of our wonderful fans for the premature congats, but for now, let’s all be happy we’re happy and still and will remain together! Eddie and I felt we couldn’t let this rumor go on any longer.
Way over 140 characters, LeAnn. And don’t think I didn’t notice that little attempt you made to start a pregnancy rumor.
Anyway, E! wasn’t about to take that lying down. Apparently, the couple got upset because they were all set to sell the story as an exclusive to another outlet, but since E! went and spilled the beans, they’re out of a paycheck. This is like some Jets vs. Sharks action getting started right here. I’m keeping my eyes peeled for a dance fight.