Well if it isn’t Lindsay‘s career taking off (um, again), then I don’t know what’s happening. ‘End of days’ comes to mind, but then again, ‘bath salts’, ‘zombie apocalypse’, and ‘THE HIV’ also come to mind, too, so there’s that.
Lindsay Lohan’s already landed the next role in her acting comeback: starring in an upcoming Lady Gaga music video off the singer’s anticipated album, “ARTPOP,” sources say.
Gaga and Lohan have become fast friends and made headlines by hanging out at the Chateau Marmont last month. Gaga posted pics of their encounter — she in a tiara and pearls while Lohan covered her mouth with a French-manicured hand — on her Web site Little Monsters. But, it seems, the collaboration is going a step further.
“Lady Gaga and Lindsay caused a stir last month when they had their ‘sleepover’ at the Chateau [Marmont],” a Hollywood insider told us, adding, “and now it turns out that Lindsay will be starring in Gaga’s new video from her upcoming album.”
Please, honestly, someone seriously tell me that Lady Gaga, though I’m not a fan, can’t be serious. Lady Gaga, and again, though I’m not a fan, is way, way too good for the likes of someone like Lindsay Lohan. Or just, you know, Lindsay Lohan. Is she for real with this charitable-friendship business? Does she really feel that bad for Lindsay and her fledgling career that she’s willing to go out on a hypodermic needle-shaped limb to help Lindsay climb back atop the famehorse (because DUH famewhore) at any cost? I realize that Lady Gaga could probably do no wrong when it comes to maintaining her massive fan base, but Lindsay Lohan? Really? Do we need to test these stagnant waters again?
August 8, 2012 at 2:30 pm by Sarah
“She’s such a nightmare. Sorry, her career is over. Her tour has been a disaster and it couldn’t happen to a bigger ****. If Madonna had any common sense she would have made a record like Ray of Light and stayed away from the dance stuff and just been a great pop singer and make great pop records, which she does brilliantly. But no, she had to go and prove … she looks like a f***ing fairground stripper. She’s been so horrible to Gaga.”
Ha! In a recent interview, Elton John slammed Madonna for being nothing better than a common “fairground stripper,” which I would guess, in UK-speak, might translate to “cheap, overdone, hasbeen ho with an overblown sense of both entitlement and importance.” At least that’s what *I* want it to mean, so we’re going to go ahead and say it’s that because it fits all too well.
Some of you might be surprised that I’d side with Elton for his nasty little diatribe, but then those of you who would be surprised either haven’t been here long enough to know my feelings on Madonna, or haven’t read any of my forty-plus prior posts regarding Madonna, or the Open Letter, for that matter, and maybe it’s because you think she’s a piece of shit, too. And in either case, that’s OK. Elton did my talking for today on the topic of Madonna, and I couldn’t be more grateful for how spot-on an articulate he was in voicing my very thoughts on this fetid old vampire with beef jerky arms.
August 6, 2012 at 10:30 am by Sarah
Remember we told you about that slumber party that supposedly went down with Lindsay Lohan, Lady Gaga, and Lana Del Rey? There’s apparently pictures of the event, showing a drunk-looking Lady Gaga, and an always-wasted Lindsay Lohan, but no photos of Lana. Don’t know. Maybe she wasn’t there after all.
The photos were taken with Ellen von Unwerth, who is a celebrity photographer, as far as I’m aware, and she looked just as f-cked up as the rest of the girls (which really wasn’t all that hard to do, apparently, because the two of them LOOKED WAY F-CKED UP).
I guess the only “good” that can come from this … If there’s any “good” to be had by anyone at all, it’d probably be all for Lana Del Rey. And that she didn’t have a tangible, proven part to any of these shenanigans, because I bet it was really, really bad, guys. Bad.
July 28, 2012 at 3:00 pm by Sarah
Leave it to Lady Gaga to put a really bad taste in our mouths on a glorious Friday when it’s going to be something like 104 degrees outsideI mean, honestly. Doesn’t she know how awful and uncomfortable it is to suffer from indigestion when the humidity index is at 100%? Gosh. Some people just can’t spare a thought of consideration for anyone else but themselves.
After the jump, you’ll see a semi-NSFW photo of Lady Gaga, displayed on her Twitter page, that doesn’t show any nipple, but does show what looks to be a really wrinkly-assed vagina (even though it’s not, not really; it’s a flesh-tone thong that doesn’t do much to hide the scarring visage of Lady Gaga’s labia. Jump in—but don’t say I didn’t warn you, OK?
July 27, 2012 at 9:30 am by Sarah
Seriously, is this not one of the most disturbing visuals you’ve ever experienced in your life? Because for me, it is. It really, really is. All of the little people hanging off of her like gangly leeches? It’s the stuff that nightmares are made of, and that’s entirely aside from the fact that Lady Gaga’s all stripped down, save for the Batman-or-Catwoman mask she’s wearing.
The fragrance claims its the “… first ever black Eau de Parfum ever,” which, roughly translated, means that it’s going to stain the hell out of your clothes, and hell, maybe even your skin.
Gaga Tweeted this ad, with the following caption:
i won’t lie I’m a bit nervous. its been awhile since i’ve shared some work with you. But i’m so proud of Steven+I, we really did not sleep!
I just love Lady Gaga’s Tweets. Sigh.
Seriously, though, this is the perfume that’s supposed to smell like blood and semen. … What, you don’t remember that? Back in January of 2011, Lady Gaga claimed that she’d soon be marketing a perfume that smelled “like blood and semen.” And this is it! However, truth be told, it doesn’t, and for that, I’m sure everyone interested in purchasing this perfume just because Lady Gaga’s name is on it, is heaving a collective sigh. No, this is actually what the perfume is supposed to smell like:
” … tears of belladonna, crushed heart of tiger orchidea with a black veil of incense, pulverized apricot and the combinative essences of saffron and honey drops.”
(Whatever the f-ck ‘combinative’ is supposed to mean.)
The fragrance itself, however, honestly sounds like it’s going to smell pretty good. One of my most-favorite-of-all-time perfumes is Tom Ford’s Black Orchid, which sounds a lot like this. According to Ford’s design team, Black Orchid is … well, it’s this:
Bergamot, Citrus, Mandarin, Black Gardenia, Jasmine, Ylang-Ylang, Lotus Wood, Orchid, Spicy Floral Accord, Orchid (Tom Ford Black Accord), Patchouli, Sandalwood, Incense, Vanilla.
Similar, I guess. It’s got some of the same notes, so I’m sure it’s not going to be way different.
If you’re one of those, however, who is heavily disappointed in the fact that Lady Gaga’s perfume will not, in fact, smell like bodily excrement, here’s a gimme for you:
“[Blood and semen] is in the perfume but it doesn’t smell like it. You just get sort of the after feeling of sex from the semen and the blood is sort of primal. And the blood was taken from my own blood sample so it’s like a sense of having me on your skin.”
Just what I’ve always wanted, how about you?
July 17, 2012 at 6:30 am by Sarah
This year’s list is pretty predictable, when you take into consideration the biggest things that’ve happened this year—the second-to-last ‘Twilight’ movie debuted, Adele won every award known to man, (kill me for saying this, but) “girl power” dominated the charts with Katy Perry, Rihanna, Lady Gaga, and Taylor Swift, and of course there’s Justin Bieber and Lil Wayne. And that’s the list, guys. The whole thing. All of it. Check it out:
#10—Robert Pattinson, $26.5 million
#9—Taylor Lautner, $26.5 million
#8—Lil Wayne, $27 million
#7—Kristen Stewart, $34.5 million
#6—Adele, $35 million
#5—Katy Perry, $45 million
JUMP IN FOR THE REST!