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Kris Jenner

4Kris Jenner is releasing a cookbook because she totally cooks all the time

kris jenner cookbook

Kris Jenner is so desperate for attention that she’ll try anything to get it. Besides being the ultimate pimp for her three daughters, she’s also tried her hand at hosting a talk show and now she’s trying to pretend she’s ever set foot in a kitchen and releasing her own cookbook this October, called In the Kitchen with Kris: A Kollection of Kardashian-Jenner Family Favorites. Please, try to roll your eyes back to the front of your head.

From The International Business Times:

Jenner states that the inspiration behind writing the cook book is the huge amount of requests that she gets from friends for her recipes. The Kardashans are frequently seen entertaining during episodes of their reality show. In fact, even Giuliana mentions during the interview that she had once been a guest in Kris Jenner’s home.

Jenner mentions her grandchildren and states that she makes a mean grilled cheese sandwich that has become a favourite among her young grandchildren.

Why do I not believe that anyone asks for her recipes (or that she even has any)? Also, making a grilled cheese sandwich does not qualify you to release a cookbook. Are you kidding me?

nice try jan

If you do want to buy this piece of shit because you’re a masochist, it’s available for pre-order from Amazon for $19.25, which is a joke.

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July 22, 2014 at 6:00 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Kris Jenner

0Even Fox execs thought Kris Jenner’s talk show sucked

kris jenner frank cicha

Kris Jenner‘s talk show bombed – not even Kanye showing off pictures of a then-newborn North West could save it. But since the Kardashian family had such a stronghold over TV, everyone was sorta left wondering why Momager Kris’s show just couldn’t get any ratings. Well, as a Fox exec put it, she’s just not all that interesting.

DAMNNNNNNNNNN.

From The Hollywood Reporter:

On Thursday, in a discussion with The Hollywood Reporter about three new shows Fox will test this summer, Frank Cicha, senior vp and president of programming for the Fox Television Stations, admitted he knew by the time the test ended that Kris wasn’t going to work. “I think she was pretty uninteresting [on camera],” Cicha said. “That was one where [sister company] 20th Television tried to capitalize on a name. … When the camera was on she looked not just like a deer in the headlights, but like a deer that already got hit.”

“It wasn’t a disaster in the ratings,” said Cicha, adding that it would have been an expensive show to produce and wasn’t a good fit for the rest of his station group’s schedule. “When you added it up, it wasn’t a show that made sense for us.”

Damn, that’s cold, Cicha, but so, so true. She’s NOT interesting. No one in that family is interesting and I’m not sure why we have ever acted like any of them are. So glad someone finally had the balls to say it, though.

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June 27, 2014 at 3:00 pm by Jennifer
Filed Under: Kris Jenner

1Kris Jenner’s Instagram got hacked, claimed to hate Kanye West

kris jenner kanye west

Someone apparently felt like Kris Jenner‘s Instagram account was worth hacking, as s/he did so yesterday and began posting messages that aren’t even halfway believable as being from the industry’s most neurotic momager. The first message claimed that she was only pretending to like her new son-in-law Kanye West so that Kim could continue to profit. The second was a diss on Khloe‘s new boyfriend French Montana (and a reference to his ex-girlfriend Trina) and the third was her claiming that her PR people would deny that she really wrote that message to begin with.

Have a look…

kris jenner hack

kris jenner hack 2

kris jenner hack 3

I mean, I guess if that’s how you wanna spend your time, it’s whatever, but… I dunno, just seems a little over-the-top to me. As if anyone is seriously going to think Kris Jenner is going to publicly admit how fucked up her family is? I don’t think so.

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June 11, 2014 at 6:30 am by Jennifer

1Kris Jenner thinks Kendall looks good topless

kris jenner kendall jenner

In today’s edition of “Why Won’t Kris Jenner Just Shut Up?”, everyone’s (least) favourite momager did an interview with the Huffington Post in which she discussed her glee over 18-year-old daughter Kendall‘s numerous topless shoots and encouraged others to appreciate how “great” she looks with no clothes on. Classic Kris!

“She’s a model and that’s really her profession. And she’s really good at what she does, and she’s just come off of a great fashion week.”

Kendall had no problem with the shoot either, Kris said, as topless shoots “come with the territory” of modeling and the 18-year-old “just wants to do a good job.”

The proud mom thinks her daughter’s model-esque proportions made the shoot particularly refined.

“She has like, the perfect body, especially one that wants to be in the modeling business,” she said. “I don’t know, I got a lot of curves and I couldn’t pull that off. But she always looks remarkable.”

But it’s Kendall’s character for which she’s most grateful.

“She’s got such a good heart, and she’s such a good kid,” she affirmed. “And she’s really so happy in her own skin. She’s not shy — it doesn’t bother her.”

Yeah, and it doesn’t bother you either because you’re used to getting attention for your daughters via them getting naked, right? First Kim’s sex tape, now this? I’ve got no problem with anyone getting naked, doing naked photo shoots, doing sex tapes, whatever – but the way this family relies on it as the ONLY interesting thing about themselves is just sad. Also, sure, your parents can be fine about you doing topless shoots or whatever because it IS part of the job – but to be publicly so ecstatic about it? Ay carumba.

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June 7, 2014 at 11:00 am by Jennifer

1Kris Jenner won’t stop running her mouth about Kim and Kanye’s wedding

kris jenner today show

Kris Jenner is one of the most desperate women alive today – desperate for attention, desperate for fame, desperate for youth, desperate for her daughters’ lives… you name it, she is clawing for it. That’s why she stopped by the TODAY show to chat to Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb on Thursday to gush about Kim & Kanye‘s magical wedding, complete with Andrea Bocelli performance.

The momager, 58, gushed that her second-eldest daughter’s Florentine nuptials were “so beautiful and magical…it was just a love fest.” In fact, Jenner added, “It was the most wonderful time I think I’ve ever had and it’s hard to explain that to somebody in words.”

Her favorite moment from the wedding? When “Kim thought she was walking down the aisle to a recording of Andrea Bocelli singing,” she explains, “And … all of a sudden she looks over and sees Andrea Bocelli standing there singing … and she looks up and she actually like screamed … it was so cute.”

Kris also wants everyone to know just how ~glamourous~ her hectic lifestyle is, with various members of her family jetting here and there 24/7:

“Yesterday morning I was walking out the door to catch a plane at 4 o’clock in the morning and Kanye was rolling in [through the door at the same time] from New York and I’m like, ‘I can’t keep track!’”

What exactly do you need to keep track of? When Kanye – who is your son-in-law, not your husband or your infant – is coming home? Not buying the Kardashian/Jenner lifestyle as anything worthwhile. It all just seems a bit sad, to me. As for Rob, she just said that everyone is praying for him to get his life together and called him “a great human being”. In other words, he’s a cheeseburger away from being banished from the family.

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June 6, 2014 at 9:00 am by Jennifer

1Kris Jenner calls Rob Kardashian ‘an obese person with a failed sock line’

kris jenner rob kardashian

Oh dear, there is some drama in the Kardashian/Jenner family at the moment, isn’t there? First Rob flew back to LA ahead of Kim and Kanye’s wedding over him appearing in pictures and “bringing down the family name” and now apparently his own mother, momager Kris, has been treating him like shit since she views him as “an obese person with a failed sock line”, which… LOL (even though not LOL).

From Radar Online (via Star Magazine):

“Everyone thinks he skipped the wedding because of Kim, but it’s him mom who makes him feel terrible,” a source told Star magazine.

“Rob is spiraling out of control and it’s all his mother’s fault. The world thinks the Kardashians are so happy, but Kris treats Rob like dirt. He says she’s a monster.”

“Kris says he’s the only one of her kids who is an embarrassment — an obese person with a failed sock line,” the source charged.

“Rob needs to stop lying and own up to the fact that he has issues. Until he admits to his problems, he’s not going to get better.”

I mean, maybe it’s just me, but I sort of feel like Kris is a bigger embarrassment considering she’s trying to rival Joan Rivers in the plastic surgery department and is desperate to live vicariously through putting her daughters on the Hollywood ho stroll. What’s worse – being an awful human being with nothing about you whatsoever personality-wise, or being fat? I’ll take fat, thanks.

I know Rob’s an adult, but can someone please adopt him into their family so he can get away from this bullshit? I actually feel bad for the guy.

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June 5, 2014 at 11:00 am by Jennifer
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