Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kris Jenner

Kris Jenner is having a meltdown over that Bruce Jenner InTouch cover

bruce jenner intouch

Last week, InTouch Weekly stooped to new lows (I know, you didn’t think it was possible) by superimposing Bruce Jenner‘s face onto Stephanie Beacham‘s body and adding a full face of makeup. This was an attempt to “out” him as transgender, which is not a new story by any means, but a fucked up one nonetheless given that a) Bruce has never spoken about this publicly and therefore, even if there is any truth to it, is a hot ass mess and b) There’s never been any proof that there is any truth to this and c) it’s InTouch and who even reads that bullshit?

In any case, because the world revolves around his ex-wife Kris Jenner, she is apparently so distraught over this cover that she’s having an absolute meltdown, acting out with her classic histrionics to the point that Khloe Kardashian felt the need to send her mom a huge bouquet of flowers, promising to always be there for her.

Now, sources close to the Jenner and Kardashian families tell Confidenti@l they sure hope In Touch got a good laugh out of the Photoshopped mockup, because it’ll cost them access to team Kardashian in the new year.

“Kris (Jenner) has cut off contact with In Touch, Life & Style and all Bauer publications,” says a source close to the reality TV royals.

“They won’t get any ‘real’ quotes from the family, and will be banned from Kardashian-Jenner red carpets, events, premieres and fashion events,” we’re told.

“Kris is a powerhouse — you’d better believe she’ll stick to it,” we’re assured.

Kris was so upset that Khloe Kardashian sent flowers to her momager, trying to lift her spirits about the way her ex-husband is treated in the press. She included a card reading, “Everything will fall into place, and until then we’ll have Belvedere (vodka). I love you mom.”

While a rep for Bauer declined to comment, a publishing insider says VIPs at the tabloid feel like their marriage to the Kardashians ended a long time ago.

“In Touch doesn’t care if the Kardashians don’t speak to them,” says our insider. “They felt betrayed anyway, that the family used them to get famous, then dumped them.”

Yeah, whoop-dee-doo that Kris won’t give quotes to InTouch Weekly. I mean, heaven forbid! Whatever will they do now? I dunno, maybe make the quotes up like they’ve always done? Photoshop pics just like they did on this very cover???

I think it shows the depths of Kris’ sheer delusional selfishness, however – and keep in mind, this isn’t surprising – that she’s more concerned about how this cover affects HER rather than how, you know, Bruce must feel to have something that’s very personal be speculated about so publicly AND to be made fun of to the point that a national trash magazine is Photoshopping makeup on his face. Good God.

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Kris Jenner strips with Kendall around the Christmas tree

kendall jenner

I don’t even really know where to begin (or end) with this one. You know that Love Magazine shoot/video with Kendall Jenner being all sultry and dancing around a Christmas tree in lingerie? Well, it just got a whole lot better (worse?) because Kris Jenner was there for her daughter’s big day and decided to get in on the naughty fun.

They smashed Christmas ornaments!

They wore reindeer antlers!

supermodel

They “danced”!

dance

Oh, man. I really need Kris to stop, like, yesterday. The whole “I’m a cool mom” routine has just gotten to be beyond creepy. Stay out of your daughter’s lingerie shoots and get your own life instead of pimping your daughters out so you can live vicariously. I mean, come on!

kris

Anyhow, if you really want to torture yourself with the full video, here you go!

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Kim Kardashian sent Kris Jenner a very special email

kim kardashian kris jenner

I’m pretty sure Kris Jenner is some sort of evil mastermind, hell bent on controlling the lives of her daughters – each of whom she’s whored out to the highest bidder since they were able to make duck lips on Instagram – and everything about them: their money, their image, their business endorsements, etc. She also knows just how to put them in their places when they get a bit too cheeky for their own good. That has to be true, since I can’t think of another reason Kris felt the need to share an email sent to her by her most lucrative daughter (for the moment), Kim Kardashian:


I’m not quite sure what to make of the fact that Kim thinks Amish is spelled “omish”, though perhaps we can’t blame her for spelling phonetically. I suppose we should be lucky she can compose an email at all. Besides, maybe she’s right – maybe we do need more “chic, tights dresses” in our lives. What do I know?

Either way, I think Kris is an evil genius who thought, “Huh, you think you’re telling me something about fashion? I’ll humiliate you!”… though considering no one ever believed Kim was a Mensa scholar, I don’t know how effective that plan was.

Looks like Kris Jenner really does have a new boyfriend!

kris jenner corey

If I was Kris Jenner, I’m not sure how I’d feel about my new boyfriend, Corey Gamble, denying that he was with me and claiming that I set him up by taking a picture with him in a restaurant when in reality, we were actually together. That’s what’s happened here, though. Cory denied it, but he and Kris are clearly a couple, as you can see in the photo above, and in this one:

kris jenner corey 2

The laughable thing here isn’t the fact that she’s got a new boyfriend, it’s how she’s dressed like she’s Kendall’s age instead of a grown ass woman. Not that a grown woman can’t wear Nikes, but this whole ensemble just seems so try-hard on Kris, who is so desperate to morph into Kim that she’d sell her soul to the devil to make it so (if she hasn’t already). I guess she’s happy, at least?

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Kris Jenner officially files for divorce from Bruce

kris jenner bruce jenner

Kris Jenner and Bruce split a little over a year ago, but there were rumours of a reconciliation somewhere in there. However, it looks like that’s not going to happen, since Kris officially filed for divorce from Bruce this week. I am unsure how to feel for Bruce – relieved because he got away from that She-Devil, or bad for how awfully he was treated throughout their marriage. I suppose really, I don’t feel either because I don’t know them and don’t really care. C’est la vie!

From TMZ:

Kris filed pro per — meaning NO LAWYER. Our sources say this was all orchestrated. Bruce Jenner‘s response is about to be filed at the L.A. County Courthouse.

She cites the standard “irreconcilable differences” as grounds for the divorce.

Everything has been worked out with their business managers … our sources say. There was NO PRENUP and they have already agreed to a property split.

Neither party will get spousal support. As for Kylie — who is 17 — they have joint custody.

Bruce, Kris and their managers worked out the deal over the last few months.

Well, that’s that, I suppose. Now Kris can desperately cling to her youth in peace and maybe even change her last name back to Kardashian, just like she’s wanted to do for the past 10 years, in an attempt to siphon off her kids’ fame. Bruce can grow old in peace and perhaps save what’s left of his hair after having lived with Kris for nearly three decades. Everyone’s happy! (The split is apparently “extremely amicable” – I bet!)

Kris Jenner and Kourtney Kardashian are naked together – shield your eyes!

kourtney kardashian kris jenner pregnant naked

Alright, so it’s not really what it seems… but it’s still going to give me nightmares! Kourtney Kardashian is currently pregnant with her third child, and she must’ve been feeling a little nostalgic for her first pregnancy yesterday, because her Instagram #TBT photo was one of her doing the naked pregnancy shoot… right next to a photo of her mother Kris Jenner doing the same. WHY, GOD, WHY?!

To add insult to injury, Kourtney kaptioned (yes, intentional) the photo with: “I got it from my mama.” Well, yes, and that’s unfortunate for all involved.

I must say, Kris had a pretty spectacular mullet going. Plus, you’ve got to hand it to her plastic surgeon(s) – she only looks about 10 years older than that pic these days, all thanks to the wonder that is cosmetic surgery!

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Justin Bieber wants to f*ck Kris Jenner, apparently

justin bieber kris jenner

It was a star-studded event in Ibiza the other night for Italian fashion designer Riccardo Tisci‘s birthday party. By “star-studded”, I mean a bunch of washed up supermodels and wannabes (nearly the entire Kardashian / Jenner family was there, for example) taking too many Instagram pictures to prove how awesome and special their lives are. Justin Bieber was there, too, and took a ton of pictures with the aforementioned Kardash/Jenner clan. The above photo, for instance, was posted along with the caption: “@kendalljenner @kyliejenner who’s your daddy”, which… no. Just no. I don’t even want to pretend or joke about Justin Bieber fucking Kris Jenner, thank you.

While it’s all fun and games to joke about sleeping with someone nearly 3 times your age, Justin might actually be having a relationship with the one member of the family who seems to hate the others: Kendall Jenner.  Word on the street (internet) is that they had a nice hook-up, but not for the first time, because I think they were linked several months ago, as well (or am I just confusing Justin with Harry Styles?).

From Page Six:

While Bloom was turned away from Tisci’s party, Bieber, 20, seemed to score with Kardashian’s sister, Kendall, 19.

Spies at the Beats by Dre-hosted bash said “they were flirting all night” and left together. “Bieber looked like he didn’t have a care in the world.”

Kendall, girl, you were just getting likeable. Don’t do it to yourself.

kendall jenner justin bieber

Meanwhile, Kim Kardashian tried to stay relevant by posting endless amounts of photos of herself looking like an extra from Willy Wonka, leading her followers to ask why she doesn’t seem to spend a single minute with her infant child rather than traipsing around the world partying.

kardashian jenner

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