Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kim Kardashian

Kanye Has A Great Idea for An Album

A photo of Kanye West

Kanye does have a pretty great idea for a new album, but first we need to talk about this picture and how amazing it is. There’s Kanye’s dumb expression, which never fails to make me giggle, but of course your eyes go straight for the man in the background. The man with the shorts that seem just a tiny bit too short. The man with the glorious tank top. The man who stole our hearts.

But anyway, here’s Kanye’s idea:

Rapper Kanye West has a wild idea, as he is attempting to make an album composed of mostly animal noises.

He experimented with the idea on “Watch The Throne”, his album with Jay-Z, but wants to take it to another level, reports

“Kanye’s telling mates this is his next ingenious plan. He’s become so obsessed with roars, barks and jungle noises that he’s experimenting with putting them on a recording,” said a source.

I just love all of Kanye’s crazy ideas, don’t you? Like when he named that one album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy and how he wants to knock Kim Kardashian up. Man, what a trip.

And since it’s Friday, and since it’s been four whole days since we last discussed the beautiful relationship between Kim and Kanye, here’s a special quote about Kanye that Kim gave during that second part of the Oprah interview:

“We met maybe almost a decade ago, I’ve known him for a really long time, we’ve been friends for like six or seven years, so it’s very comforting to have someone that knows everything about you that respects you, understands, has gone through similar things,” Kim said. “I can really relate to his mother passing, he can really relate to my father passing. I mean, there’s so many similarities in our life that I feel like I’m at a really happy, good space.”

While the two could have started dating a while ago, Kim said she feels that her experiences, namely her divorce from Kris Humphries, were things she had to go through in order to be ready for this relationship.

“I don’t know why it took so long for us to kind of get together,” Kim said. “But I think I needed to go through all my experiences and some that he’s gone through.”

If this isn’t a match made in heaven, then I just don’t know what is.

Kris Humphries Says Kris Jenner Was in Charge of Kim’s Sex Tape

A photo of Kris Humphries

My goodness, this divorce is going to be serious. There’s about a zillion reasons for that, but the latest one is Kris Humphries‘ girlfriend/special friend/stalker, Fatmire. See, she allegedly has tons of texts from Kris that are relevant to the divorce trial, including ones where Kris calls her the love of his life and ones where he explains that Kris Jenner directed Kim‘s sex tape. It’s official: Fatmire is gossip gold.

From TMZ:

Kris Humphries trashed Kim Kardashian and her family in conversations and text messages to his former girlfriend, Myla Sinanaj [that's Fatmire to you!] … telling her Kris Jenner not only directed Kim to shoot her sex tape, but to re-shoot because Kris J didn’t think the first one was pretty enough.

As TMZ first reported, Kim has subpoenaed Myla in Kim’s divorce case, and we’ve learned Myla has a lot to say about what Kris told her about his relationship with his famous estranged wife.

In addition to the sex tape, sources tell us Myla has numerous text messages in which Kris says she is the love of his life and he wants to get the divorce over with quickly so they can spend the rest of their time on earth together.  In several of the messages, we’re told Kris says specifically that he’s “moved on” from Kim.

The information is extremely damaging to Kris, because he’s alleging in his divorce that Kim has destroyed him emotionally by allegedly defrauding him into believing it was a real marriage.  Turns out, Kris has been banging Myla since mid-January, so his devastation argument may be hard to swallow.

Sources close to the Kardashians tell TMZ … Kris is lying about the sex tape.  They say Kim made it clear at the beginning of their relationship she would not discuss the tape because she didn’t want to be judged by it.  Our sources say the sex tape never came up in any subsequent discussions between Kim and Kris and it just shows he’s delusional.

Myla’s deposition should be interesting.

If this divorce doesn’t air on E!, then I will lose all faith in humankind. There, I said it.

Kim Kardashian Is Totally Sorry About That Whole Marriage Thing

A photo of Kim Kardashian

Hey, do you remember that one time that Kim Kardashian met that one dude, and they hung out for a while and then got engaged so that she could have her super special princess day, but then a couple of months later she was like “I can’t do this anymore LOL” and they broke up? So does she, and she’s totally, totally sorry if she hurt anybody, but she doesn’t have any regrets. Because of course she doesn’t.

Here are a few lovely quotes from that interview she did with Oprah:

Kim Kardashian is known for living every bit of her life on TV, however that could have all changed following the breakdown of her marriage to Kris Humphries after the star admitted that she considered backing away from “everything”.

Appearing on Oprah Winfrey’s show, Oprah’s Next Chapter, the reality TV beauty who is currently loved up with rapper Kanye West, spoke candidly about how she felt following the backlash of her marriage breakdown.

Revealing that she was in a “deep depression”, the Mail Online reported Kim as saying: “You know in your heart. Mum was supportive, so I took that time off afterwards… I would rather have been beaten up in the media than live a life that wasn’t happy.

“I was in such a deep depression I thought I was going to back away from everything. I stayed at home for almost four months and I’m a better person now, as heartbreaking as it was to go through.”

Despite the upset, Kim admitted that she wouldn’t have changed it, adding: “For anyone I hurt, I’m truly sorry, I don’t wish pain on anyone, but the person I am because of that crazy experience, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

“I loved him, obviously it hurt him, and it hurt me too. It was embarrassing, I don’t want to call it a mistake, it was a lesson.”

Asked how she felt about the rumours that her marriage was for publicity, Kim strongly denied the rumours and revealed that she still has a place for Kris in her heart.

She said: “I was in love, I wanted the life that I always pictured my fairytale life to be. I would’ve had an extravagant wedding anyway, to end that relationship was a risk in itself to lose ratings and I had to take the risk to be honest to myself.

“He’s a good person. I will always have a place in my heart for him. It just wasn’t for me.”

“To end that relationship was a risk in itself to lose ratings.” That’s a thing that Kim actually said. I just wanted to make sure everyone saw that.

Another fun point is that in the interview, Kim expanded on her “fairy tale life” by saying “I want babies, I want my forever, and I want my fairy tale,” and Oprah asked her if Kanye was her new fairy tale. Kim’s answer? I don’t know, we have to wait for the second part that airs next Sunday. Curse you, Oprah!

Quotables: Kim Kardashian is, Like, Totally Growing Up

photo of the kardashians and oprah winfrey pictures interview pic

“I’m totally growing up. A lot of my friends, the people that I love to just sit and talk to and spend my time with, are wiser, a little bit older than me. Before I used to, you know, all my boyfriends were younger. I always dated five years younger. My whole thing was completely different … I love that I’m with someone who is a couple years older than me,” she says of West. “I love that my friends are even sometimes 20, 30 years older than me …Kourtney had this epiphany when she had the baby and she changed into a different person. I feel like I’ve had an epiphany over the last year for what I’ve been through, and I am that changed person just from my own experiences.”

Sigh. Doesn’t she say this kind of stuff every year? “Over the last year [I've completely changed]“? Because I swear, we hear this bit year in and year out. You’d think by now that Kim would be an ENTIRELY different person who’s selfless, thoughtful, charitable, honest, meek, modest, demure, and above all, likable.

Not, you know, still the complete opposite of all of those lovely words above.

Get this interview over with, Oprah, because I’ve just about had it on not being able to keep my breakfast down, OK? Damn.

Look, More Quotes from Oprah’s Interview with The Kardashians!

A photo of Oprah Winfrey and the Kardashians

I can’t tell you why I’m so excited for the legendary Oprah Winfrey to interview all of the Kardashians, but I really, really am. Maybe it’s because I want to hear Kim talk about the divorce. Maybe it’s because I’m excited to see the whole family together. Or maybe it’s because I like to pretend that Khloe is my best friend, and besties totally support besties. I don’t know.

Regardless of the reason, my excitement remains the same. Or it did, until I read new quotes from the interview. After that my excitement shot way up, as if that was even possible.

It’s no secret that Kris Jenner is very hands on when it comes to her kids’ careers.

But does the momager overdo it as a manager and forsake her role as a mom when doing business with the Kardashian kids? In an OWN special airing Sunday, Oprah Winfrey sat down with Kim Kardashian, Kourtney Kardashian, Khloé Kardashian Odom and Rob Kardashian and asked what they thought about claims their mom was “pimping her children.”

“I think that’s so ridiculous,” Kim said. “First of all, we have to hire a manager. So regardless, someone is going to get that [job].

“No one will fight harder for you than your own mother,” she added. “She knows us. She knows all of our moods…We just get each other. We vibe. It works.”

The OWN mogul then moved on to another touchy topic: Would the Kardashians would be running an empire and enjoying the success they have today if they weren’t “good-looking kids?”

“Well,” Rob started, pointing to his three older sisters. “They’re not, like, skinny women.” (Khloé, of course, put her little bro in check, asking, “Who are you?” and sarcastically telling him, “You’re so sweet.”)

“I mean in today’s society, yeah, to be honest, probably not,” Lamar Odom’s lovely wife answered. “You have to have this bombshell over here [Kim] and this petite little bundle of joy [Kourtney] and this hunk next to me [Rob].” (For the record, Khloé, you majorly factor into that gorgeousness equation!)

“But we are all different,” Kourtney added. “We have different body types.”

“But I don’t think [our success] would’ve happened if we were all like skinny, pretty models,” Kim reasoned. “I think it has to do with us, the curves, the dark hair!”

She also thinks that the sisters “helped broaden” the representation of Middle-Eastern women in mainstream media, giving them a niche role as they rose to fame.

So. Excited.

Oprah Interviews All of The Kardashians

A photo of the Kardashian family and Oprah

From Us Weekly:

She’s hobnobbed with A-list actors and actresses and traveled worldwide as a result of her reality TV success, but nothing impressed Kim Kardashian more than an at-home sit-down chat with Oprah Winfrey.

“Ummmm no big deal Oprah just left my mom’s house! #DreamComeTrue,” the Keeping Up With the Kardashians star, 31, tweeted late Tuesday after she joined sisters Kourtney and Khloe, brother Rob, Scott Disick, Lamar Odom, and Kris, Kylie, Kendall and Bruce Jenner to film an interview segment for Oprah’s Next Chapter, airing Sunday on OWN.

Added pregnant Kourtney: “Surreal day being interviewed by the queen Oprah. Not many words to explain how incredible the experience was except for AHHH! Major moment.”

Winfrey, 58, was just as impressed with the reality TV family, whom she became acquainted with before the interview thanks to a “Kardashian Kram” session. “I had never met them, nor seen the show. I did a full on Kardashian Kram in preparation, watching major shows from every season,” Winfrey revealed on her Facebook page, posting a group photo taken during the interview.

What will talk show titan Winfrey address during the one-hour chat? “I genuinely wanted to know why they have become a cultural phenomenon, why so many people love to watch their every move and why so many others love to hate them,” she said. “Are they completely ego centered? Are they really ‘famous for being famous’ or is there something more?”

Winfrey told her Facebook fans she was most impressed with Disick, Odom, and Kim and Khloe’s responses to her queries. As for Kim’s justification of her 72-day marriage to NBA star Kris Humphries? Winfrey says the media mogul’s answer “leveled me.”

“Those of you who watch [Keeping Up With the Kardashians] know they hold nothing back. This interview I’d say was another level of forthrightness and honesty,” Winfrey hints.

Oh my god, is it Sunday yet? Because this interview will be phenomenal. What did Kim say about her divorce that could have “leveled” poor Oprah? If Oprah did a “Kardashian Kram” before the interview, then she knows all about how much this family overshares, so how could this possibly be “another level of forthrightness and honesty”?

Another interesting thing is that this is supposed to be the first interview with every single Kardashian present at the same time. There’s the brother, and the two little ones. Scott Disick and Lamar Odom are both there. It’s everybody. Is it going to be a clusterf-ck? Is everyone going to be polite and respectful? I DON’T KNOW, IT’S NOT SUNDAY YET.

Quotables: Poor Kimmy Just Doesn’t Understand

A photo of Kim Kardashian

“I don’t get the fact, like, why it’s talked about. I don’t get it. Sometimes I get bored of talking about it. Most women have one.”

So what is Kim Kardashian talking about here? What does she have that she talks about frequently and that she thinks most other women would have? A sex tape, perhaps? A throwaway marriage? An ego so big that if it were a physical part of her body it would dwarf her gigantic ass?

Close. It’s just her ass. She’s just talking about her ass. Specifically, she’s talking about how people talk about her ass, which is one of the reasons why people do, in fact, talk about her ass.

Another reason that people talk about it is because she wants them to talk about it. If she didn’t want any attention placed on her backside, then she wouldn’t shake it around so much. And don’t even tell me that with an ass that size, it’s impossible not to shake it around, because I won’t believe you for a second. If we’re going by the numbers, Kim has said that there’s a 13 inch difference between her waist and her hips. I have her beat by three inches (thanks for the genetics, Mom), and it’s really not an issue as long as you know how to dress for it.

Oh, and another reason why people talk about her ass? She gets x-rays taken of it and shows them on television. But god, why won’t everyone just shut up about it already?