2Kim Kardashian And Kris Humphries Are Officially Divorced!

The marriage was a 72-day sham that lasted long enough for the check to clear in the bank, but some idiots still want to convince us that Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries‘ love was real and their divorce was an unexpected travesty – even though she didn’t even want to go on her honeymoon with him. Yeah, and I’m the queen of England. In any case, the pair came face to face in court today and someone’s told TMZ (or some TMZ intern has dreamed it up) that Kim was excited to see Kris because she still has a whole lot of love for him. Uh…

Sources very close to Kim tell TMZ … Kim is actually looking forward to seeing him.  She’s saying she does indeed still love him as a person, acknowledging, “We just didn’t work as a couple.”

We’re told Kim has actually reached out to Kris numerous times, but he never responded.

Kim is saying they have “unfinished business” and need to talk things out so they can truly move on.

This is probably complete and utter bullshit, but even if it’s true, I think it’s pretty clear it’s all one-sided and there’s definitely no love lost, from Kris’ perspective.

In any case, we can all celebrate now because the case is closed and they are now officially divorced!

Kim Kardashian is officially a single woman … because the judge dissolved her marriage to Kris Humphries in today’s court hearing … and we’ve learned Kris walked away with NOTHING.

Here’s what sources connected with the case tell TMZ:

– Kris gets NO money from Kim.  As we’ve reported … he had previously demanded $7 mil.

– Kris dropped his demand for an annulment based on fraud.

– Each party will pay their own attorney’s fees.

This is not just a settlement. It’s a WIN for Kim and her lawyer, disso-queen Laura Wasser.

Sounds good to me, especially if it means we never have to hear about the two of them again. Good riddance!

April 19, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

5Kim K Didn’t Want To Go On Her Honeymoon With Kris Humphries And Now He’s Using It Against Her

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are dragging up all kinds of unresolved stuff in their settlement conferences on this long and annoying road to divorce. Humphries is alleging that their wedding was a scam. Which is why he’s bringing up this honeymoon thing. From The Daily Mail:

Kim Kardashian did not want to go on honeymoon with Kris Humphries, it has been reported.

Kris was the one to push for the honeymoon. Kim didn’t want to go on the honeymoon because they were scheduled to move to New York City to begin filming Kourtney & Kim Take New York,’ a source told Radar Online.

‘She also complained she was stressed out from planning the wedding. Kris was stunned and very hurt because it was important to him that they go away. Remember, he wasn’t playing basketball at the time because of the NBA strike, and they wouldn’t be able to take one for a year.’

The insider then claimed that Kim hired a photographer to come and snap photos of the couple while they soaked up the sun.

‘Kim finally relented. Kris was absolutely dumbfounded when a photographer appeared out of nowhere and started taking pics of them by the pool,’ the source said. ‘Kim happily posed, and Kris realised her camp had arranged it.’

At her divorce deposition Kim confessed that she was against going on the holiday, which Kris is allegedly using as part of his case against the 32-year-old reality star, claiming their marriage was fraud.

Kim would of course never fake anything regarding her life or her show (as if there’s a distinction.)

Ray J, you can have her.

April 18, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

29Here Are The Top 20 Most Hated Celebs In Hollywood…And Chris Brown Isn’t Even In The Top 5

Chris Brown is a hated celebrity but apparently not as much as Anne Hathaway (which James Franco totally gets, btw). Star magazine released their super scientific list of top 20 most hated Hollywood celebrities. Weirdly Jay Leno is more hated than Chris Brown, which is making me laugh really hard. Here’s the stupid list:

20. Chris Brown
19. Jesse James
18. Taylor Swift
17. Shia LaBeouf
16. Lindsay Lohan
15. Angelina Jolie
14. Jay Leno
13. Ashton Kutcher
12. LeAnn Rimes
10 and 11. Kris Jenner and Kim Kardashian
9. Anne Hathaway
8. Justin Bieber
7. Madonna
6. Matt Lauer
5. Katherine Heigl
4. John Mayer
3. Jennifer Lopez
2. Kristen Stewart
1. Gwyneth Paltrow

This is a pretty good list. I’m shocked to see that Kanye West isn’t on here. I love him but I thought he was one of the most hated people around. I’m not sure if he’s psyched or pissed not to be included. I also didn’t realize that people hated Matt Lauer this much. Damn. Too bad this poll was taken after Justin Bieber’s idiotic Anne Frank statement or I’m sure he would be higher up. Kristen Stewart now has the dubious honor of being one of the most hated and least attractive female celebrities. Hey, good for her! At least she’s good at stuff!

Who is your ultimate most hated celebrity?

April 16, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

2Royals Are Just Like Us: Kate Middleton Likes ‘Keeping Up With The Kardashians’

Today in “My, Aren’t We Relatable?” news, Kate Middleton apparently really likes Keeping Up with the Kardashians and started watching it after she heard that Kim Kardashian is fond of her. William apparently makes fun of her – nay, takes the piss out of her – for watching that trash, but she will not be deterred!

From The Daily Star:

A source close to the Princess told us: “Ever since Kim started mentioning Kate a lot in public, the Princess has started watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians religiously.

“She thinks the family are hilarious. People forget that Kate is just a normal girl, who married into royalty, and enjoys the same trashy TV shows most people do.”

But she hasn’t managed to get Prince William, 30, into the Krazy antics of the famous telly family.

We’re told: “Will doesn’t watch the show with her, and makes fun of her for liking it so much. It doesn’t bother Kate, though. She finds it relaxing, and is flattered Kim keeps speaking so highly of her.”

Do I think this is true? Not a chance. Shit, I’m not even royalty and I don’t have time in my day to watch the Kardashians (though I have, in past, kept those E! marathons on, not gonna lie). For some reason, I just can’t see Kate – who I was shocked to find out is my age when I first saw her – plopping down on the couch with a sleeve of Oreos and a bottle of Stella cidre (well, especially not when pregnant) to watch a bunch of airheads bop around Los Angeles and speak in screechy voices. Sorry, I’m calling bullshit on this one.

April 12, 2013 at 11:30 am by Jennifer

3Amanda Bynes’ Parents To Kim Kardashian: STFU

Kim Kardashian may have thought she was complimenting Amanda Bynes, but Amanda Bynes’ parents don’t see it that way and basically want her to shut the f-ck up.

Ms. Kardashian, while on the Chelsea Lately show, commented,

Am I the only one who is obsessed with her new makeover? I think she looks amazing with the blonde hair and those nails.

Sister Khloe added,

I love to wear fishnets to the gym. I don’t think that’s abnormal.

Meanwhile according to a source for Radar via Huffington Post:

Bynes’ parents thought Kim’s remarks were made in “poor taste and are very upset about it,” as “it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to look at Amanda and surmise that she is having some sort of crisis.”

Unfortunately for all of us, Kim Kardashian is about as far away from a rocket scientist as one could get. She’s not even a rocket scientist’s intern. If they have interns.

But upon hearing of her parents’ concern, Ms. Bynes is now the one saying STFU, tweeting,

I don’t speak to my parents anymore, they don’t talk to reporters on my behalf. Don’t believe anything you read about me unless I tweet it. [...] My friends don’t speak on my behalf either. Please don’t read anything about me needing help. That offends me. Follow me on twitter!

We GET IT AMANDA, YOU WANT MORE TWITTER FOLLOWERS.

Oh and in case you were wondering, the shitty photo posted up top is Bynes approved. She tweeted it with,

@WonderwallMSN Thanks! This is a good pic to post of me when I’m walking. @eonline @BakerMachado @rebeccamacatee http://twitpic.com/cigjw5

April 11, 2013 at 3:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives

7Russell Brand Loses It for Good, Jokes About Wanting a Kardashian Foursome

Russell Brand might be a generally cool dude, but he’s also a f-cking weirdo who says some bizarre shit sometimes that makes me wonder what in the hell he was thinking, if he was indeed thinking anything at all. His latest foray into nonsense included joking about wanting a foursome with the Kardashians three – Kim, Kourtney and Khloe – and yes, that’s in spite of Kim being heavily pregnant (which seems to be even more of a turn on).

While guest hosting Chelsea Lately, the Kardashians interviewed Brand, during which he said (via DigitalSpy):

“I’m vulnerable to the concept of a KKK threesome,” Brand quipped, leading Khloe to say to the pregnant Kim: “Well, I heard pregnant p***y is the best p***y.”

The comedian went on to say: “I think pregnant women are radiant and beautiful and the idea of lactation is an interesting one.”

Brand went on to tease that his sexual experience with the Kardashian siblings would entail a “limitless, foaming river of milk and orgasm”.

Uh… I don’t consider myself to be easily grossed out, but that gave me shivers, and not in a good way. I mean, “the idea of lactation is an interesting one”?? Whatever floats your boat, bro, but keep it to yourself.

April 10, 2013 at 9:30 am by Jennifer