Here are some of the sound bites:
Russell, a former sex addict, on his tamer life in the bedroom: “I can’t believe I used to have sex 20 times a week, especially now I’m married. But now I’m a bloody good gardener.”
On what it would be like for him to raise children: “I’m aware I have no recourse if they misbehave. ‘Expelled from school for drugs? Well done you’re on target.’”
On monogamy and shacking up: “It’s difficult getting used to one person and being in the same house everyday.”
On getting used to Katy’s lifestyle: “She takes ages to get ready. It’s unbelievable. I had no idea what went on, I was never normally around for that bit.”
So his sex addiction has turned into a gardening addiction, he’s not sure he’s capable of raising kids, he’s still not confident about living with one woman for the rest of his life and he had no idea what it takes to transform her from an average lookin’ lady to the sexpot we all know. Yup. Sounds like someone bit off more than they could chew to me.
I give ‘em another year, tops. Do you think these two have a chance at lasting?
March 23, 2011 at 2:30 pm by Molls
Katy Perry is a babe. There, I said it. Her music sucks, her mom creeps me out and her unbreakable ties to her super conservative religious beliefs creep me out even more, but the girl’s attractive, okay?
What’s bringing on this confession? Katie’s new spread in Plastic Dreams, which shows a more artistic and avant-garde side to the typically typical singer. Like Lindsay, Katy may be better off in photos than she is anywhere else. More of this, girl! More of this!
March 21, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Molls
You know, I WAS THAT KID who was CRAZY FRIGHTENED BY CLOWNS. My friends used to bring these stupid porcelain dolls to the house for sleepovers and chase me all around with them, and naturally, I’d freak to the point of almost pissing myself. That was ages ago, and I’m not into the whole ‘pissing myself’ thing anymore, but I still don’t really do clowns. And even though Katy Perry is probably as harmless as they come, I’m remaining on my guard.
March 18, 2011 at 6:30 am by Sarah
See that lady in the photo above? That’s Mary Perry Hudson (the older lady, not weird-looking Katy Perry – that picture was taken in 2008, but doesn’t she look way different?), and she’s got some words to say. Before we analyze anything, let’s just take a gander at Mom’s book proposal:
“Amid a torrent of negative reports from tabloid magazines and entertainment shows, Mary Hudson wants to tell ‘her story’ and dispel a lot of rumors. Katy’s success has impacted her ministry in both negative and positive ways. She loves her daughter very much and is very proud of her accomplishments, but disagrees with a lot of choices she makes in her career. This memoir is to set the record straight. It is not Christian proselytizing or a Katy Perry tell-all. It is the story of Mary Perry Hudson.”
I think they threw in that “it’s not Christian proselytizing or a Katy Perry tell-all” because it’s Christian proselytizing AND a Katy Perry tell-all. Because not trying to be rude or anything, but who would buy a book about some lady who just happened to be Katy Perry’s mom?
Based on Mrs. Mary Perry Hudson’s past statements, I would definitely be interested in reading this book. I would read all about Katy’s promotion of those damned homosexuals and how “I Kissed a Girl” hurt the Lord Jesus Christ’s feelings, and I would do so because I love absurdism. What about you?
March 16, 2011 at 12:30 pm by Emily
Oh blue-haired Katy Perry. Where does this heinous crap come from? Is the blue hair an alter-ego? Is the blue hair a sign of crazy times to come? Is it a private sex joke between you and your wacked-out husband, Russell Brand? A political statement? A way to encourage young boys to lift their chins and smooch up on your funeral parlor makeup-caked decolletage? And perhaps MOST importantly, DOES IT MATCH YOUR PUBES?
Proof or it didn’t happen. Please.
March 9, 2011 at 7:30 am by Sarah
For what it’s worth, I like this version more than the original. Then again, it doesn’t make me feel like I’m right on the brink of having a seizure for four straight minutes like Lady Gaga’s music does. How do you guys feel about Katy Perry’s cover?
*Of course I’m joking. It’s sort of an “all or nothing” thing with these ladies, right? I’ve never heard of someone being like “Oh, Lady Gaga, fuck her, she’s worthless. Hey, can you put on “California Gurls?”