Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Kate Middleton

I Think It’s OK If We Like Kate Middleton Now

A photo of Kate Middleton

It really was touch and go for a while with Kate Middleton, no joke. Like, of course she was stunning and beautiful and graceful and all that during that one wedding, but she often gives off a sort of bitchy vibe too. But then this precious little girl with cancer got this notion that she wanted to meet Kate. Here’s the girl’s letter:

“Dear Princess Kate. My name is Diamond Ann. I am six. I was named after Princess Diana. My Mommy Memory is in heaven with her.

I have cancer. I spend a lot of time at the hospital. I watched you get married from my bed there. You looked pretty.

I like playing Princess dress up. My favourite princess is Aurora. Who is yours. I would really like to meet you. Do you want to meet me too? “

And not to be mean, but any cold-hearted bitch who could refuse a request like that doesn’t deserve to be anything at all in this world, much less a princess. I could probably come up with something harsher than that, but thankfully I don’t need to, because Kate was a doll and, at a little stop on the great Canada tour, she took some time to meet little Diamond Ann.

So are we all crying again or what? And does Kate have our official seal of approval?

Love It or Leave It: Fancy Royal Hats!

A photo of Kate Middleton and Prince William

It’s been a little over a month since the royal wedding craze, so I figure you guys would be cool to receive an update on what Prince William and Kate Middleton were up to these days. It’ll be a pretty quick update:  they’ve been wearing fancy hats!

This is a photo of the lovely couple at a derby yesterday. Personally, I think Will is looking suitably fly in his little top hat, but I’m a little disappointed with Kate. Now that she’s a member of the royal family, she really needs to step up her hat game, right?

One Part of The Royal Wedding I Can Get Behind: The Cake

I told you the other day that I was so fed up with Royal Wedding fever that I was basically annoyed to the point of petty anger, but here’s one aspect of the whole shebang that I’m willing to concentrate on: THE CAKE, Y’ALL.

Personally, I get sick of cake after a bite or two, but a well-made pastry ain’t nothing to scoff at, and this delicacy? It’s fit for a future king and his bride, that’s for damn sure.

The flavor was William’s favorite chocolate biscuit cake (once again, Kate’s preferences are swept to the side) and the design is pretty traditional, but the details are phenomenal. Check out the closeups in the gallery. Is that a freakin’ tassel made out of icing? Incredible. And definitely classier than whatever that squinty-eyed husband thief LeAnn Rimes and her gross husband ate at their tacktastic wedding last week.

One thing? I’d be afraid to touch this thing with a knife. Sometimes they make these wedding cakes so pretty that it’s a complete shame that someone’s gotta bring a knife to it, but I guess we know all about pretty things getting knives waved at them around these parts, huh?

Princess Weddings Through the Years: Kate Middleton Trumps Them All

photo of princess katherine middleton pictures photos wedding coverage royal pics

Ah wedding dresses. Or rather, wedding dresses of people who don’t bat an eye when it comes to dropping a small fortune on them. Above and below, you see the various wedding fashions dating back to the, like, early part of the twentieth century, all the way to today.

Who’s your favorite wedding princess?

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OMG The Royal Wedding Kiss!

The kiss is just about at the minute mark, and the rest of the clip is basically just a bunch of royals on the balcony at Westminster Abbey waving and egging the crowd on while watching the Queen look like she wants to kick some little boy ass.

ALSO. Wouldn’t it be totally awesome if Prince Harry decided to go and hook up with Pippa Middleton? I mean, both of these siblings, Harry AND Pippa, look like total hell-raisers, and I think they’d nicely balance the somber and reserved Prince William and now-Princess Kate quite well, don’t you?

I’m pulling for it, you guys. Let’s make it happen.

And Here’s the Royal Wedding Vows If You Also Happened to Miss Those

I know, I know. I said I was going to just stop this madness, but I can’t help it. I mean, I said I wasn’t going to eat the rest of that chocolate bunny head last night, but what happened? TOTALLY FUCKING ATE IT.

That’s what this wedding is like. I promised myself I’d stay away from it, but here I am. Sneakily at it, fearing that someone’s going to catch me gorging myself on something that’s just soooo bad, but you just can’t tear yourself away from it.

I love how Kate had a REALLY HARD TIME keeping a stoic face, and you just KNOW she was thinking about how many McQueen fashions and Louboutins she was going to be able to buy in the coming months. No, I’m kidding. She was totally thinking about how crazy it was going to be to shag later tonight as an official Princess.