4Love It or Leave It: Karina Smirnoff for Playboy

Welp, she said she was going to do it, even though it’s probably cost her a job at Dancing With the Stars (the notoriously ‘family-friendly’ show that Sarah Palin wholly endorsed while her daughter Bristol danced): Karina Smirnoff has gone and posed nude for Playboy. Girlfriend, who’s best known for being super-hot, a wicked dancer, and former girlfriend of Mario Lopez, Karina hasn’t even yet attained the type of fame that Heidi Montag has, yet she’s already taking her clothes off.

I mean, crap – even Heidi didn’t spill all the beans on her body to Playboy, but that’s probably because I imagine that Heidi’s nether regions probably look like knotted, knobbly balls of sinew and plastic, all the color of rancid meat (sometimes? skin just doesn’t heal all that well after it’s been torn and stitched and cauterized so many times).

Well, hey.  Good for you, Karina, for doing what you want, but I expect that you’ll toddle off into obscurity on those crazy dancer’s feet pretty soon.  All in all, it’ll be alright – you’ll always have those Playboy pictures after all the sparkle and glitter has faded.

April 14, 2011 at 11:30 am by Sarah

1Caption This: The Situation and His Dancing Partner, Karina Smirnoff

How much you wanna make a bet that these two will be fucking dating engaged by the time this season of Dancing With the Stars is over with?

Based on previous instances, I’m saying that the likelihood is pretty high, guys.  Pretty feckin’ high.

September 20, 2010 at 7:04 am by Sarah

6Is There a Body Language Expert in the House?

Here’s a picture of  engaged Dancing With The Stars stars Karina Smirnoff and Maksim Chmerkovskiy taken on August 30th.  Ten days ago.  Today, Karina’s rep confirms that the couple are through.  They will still be performing together on DWTS.

I wonder where it all went wrong.  They recently announced that they were postponing their wedding until next summer due to busy schedules.  ”Busy schedules” is often code for “trouble on the horizon.”  I don’t know.  Maks was always kind of a jerk — he’s the dude who implied that co-stars Lacey Schwimmer and Cheryl Burke were fat.  Whatever.

Anyway, I guess this is more proof that quickie engagements don’t always pan out.  They announced their intent to marry just six months after Karina’s split from Mario Lopez.  Sad, I guess.

September 8, 2009 at 1:24 pm by Wendie

15That Was Quick!

In the News That Would Never Be Covered If Anything Else Were Happening category, Dancing With the Stars dancers Karina Smirnoff and Maksim Chmerkovskiy are now engaged.  Sigh…can you imagine what their children will look like?  Beyond abnormal genetic blessings, babies will probably pasa doble right down her birth canal. 

Their engagement comes a little more than six months after Smirnoff ended her two-year relationship with Mario Lopez.  On days like today, when I’m feeling bored and restless, I imagine Mario finding out about the engagement and there being some big dance-off to win Karina’s love.  In all fairness, my school district made us watch West Side Story every single day that it rained and we couldn’t have recess.  And also, every single year on the last day of school.  It isn’t my fault.

January 4, 2009 at 2:12 pm by Wendie