Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Justin Timberlake

Late-Night Links

Justin Timberlake announces plans to launch his own television network, JT TV. I announce plans to throw up a little in my mouth. [POTP]

Remember Lindsay Lohan? [The Blemish]

Mischa Barton does her very best Crocodile Dundee. [Celebslam]

Anna Nicole was cheating … on TRIMSPA! Leave it to CourtTV to get the hard facts in this case. [TMZ]

T.R. Knight is not getting pushed around by anyone anymore! You hear that, Diddy? [Cele|bitchy]

Jessica Simpson and John Mayer pose for some prom post-Grammy photos. [Tabloid Whore]

Paris Hilton won’t have her true commitment to the ground-breaking creation of novel soundscapes diluted by an extended appearance at such self-congratulatory nonsense as the Grammy awards. But you can take her picture real quick. [Defamer]

See? Sarah Silverman is funny. I told you so. [Gawker]

Brit’s Late-Night Vomit-rama

Not that this is even news anymore, but Britney was parting at NYC’s Tenjune late Saturday night — maybe partying a little too much. Britster exited the club and was rushed into an SUV with a blonde female friend. When she arrived at the hotel, she and the friend left, and the paps quickly noticed something was amiss within the car. They zoom in and get a close-up of the backseat of the SUV, covered in vomit. That’s hot. Video here.

Brit’s former love, Justin Timberlake, had a similar night on Friday. After performing at Avalon on Friday night (and giving K-Fed a hug on the red carpet — is there a Federlake in the works?), JT was scheduled to perform at Clive Davis’ legendary pre-Grammy bash on Saturday, but had to cancel, citing a 103 degree fever. The folks who were out partying with Justin until five o’clock Saturday morning said he seemed perfectly healthy — albeit drunk — to them. Hm. Fox News said the newly single pop star actually showed up for sound check, but just couldn’t pull it together to perform.

Maybe next time Justin should think twice before sounding off about what an irresponsible trainwreck Britney is.

Late-Night Links

Just in case Britney Spears had any surviving remnant of trust for the people she allows into her life, Isaac Cohen sits down with News of the World for a tell-all just weeks after their split. [Dirty Laundry]

The JT video for “What Goes Around Comes Around,” co-starring Scarlett Johansson, has hit the Internet. I’d comment on it, but after I’d watched for a minute or two, I was in too much pain to continue. I’d feel bad passing judgment without viewing the remaining seven freakin’ minutes. [POTP]

Someone leaked a topless photo of Jen Aniston from the set of The Break-Up. Hooray boobies! [The Blemish]

More music videos: The Killers “Read My Mind” and Scissor Sisters “She’s My Man.” [Bree, popbytes]

Ralph Fiennes joins the mile-high club. [Warship]

Justin’s Bringing ScarlettBack

Ladies and gentlemen, Justin Timberlake is dating. Yes, that’s right, he’s dating. There is more than one woman in whom he is interested, and so he is spending time romantically with both of them. You’d think the media would be familiar with this concept, as they all watch Grey’s Anatomy, and Meredith laid the concept out pretty clearly a couple months back, but everyone still seems shocked. It’s not a committed relationship … but it’s not cheating … how do we frame this?

After frollicking around Sundance with Jessica Biel, JT was back in the arms of Scarlett Johansson in Miami. The two were spotted at a Super Bowl afterparty, where, according to witnesses, “they were talking, dancing, holding hands all night – it was very cozy. Then, as they left through the back, Justin was leaning against the wall and Scarlett came up, leaned into him and did a sexy, little dance, grinding into his body.”

I am really, really happy about this, mostly because Jessica Biel is certain to be really, really unhappy about this. I take great pleasure in the little things.

Justin Timberlake: So Fucking Badass

dear jt,

hi i just want to tell u that i think u r awsome. i love the new album espeshly that song sexy back. i am so exitedto see u on kids choice awards. i thought it was relly funny when u were on punk’d and the tax ppl took all ur stuff and u freaked out and cried. r u and ashton friends in real life? he is cute butn ot as cute as u. that is awsome that u said that u were fukkin high when that happened. weed rulez man. u r prolly the most hardcore dude i have ever heard of.getting stoned is kewl. hey if u are ever in tulsa u should totally come to my mom’s house and smoke me out. i bet u have some killa shit man. rock on.

ur #1 fan,
amy

I Believe the Children Are Our Future


I hate both the MPAA and the FCC. Essentially I hate censorship in all its forms and I advocate a society where I’m allowed to choose what I’d like to guzzle.

That said, I am a little confused by this news: Justin Timberlake will be hosting the Kid’s Choice Awards. I know what you’re thinking, “Hey, what the hell are the Kid’s Choice Awards?” Fair point.

But I bet they involve children, unless it’s some kind of weird pedophile buffet thing. In which case I bet getting sponsorship/televised would be a bitch. So JT and the kids getting together because he’s a kid-like role model style guy. I now present you some selected lyrics to “Sexy Back.”

Dirty babe
You see these shackles
Baby I’m your slave
I’ll let you whip me if I misbehave

Oh crap, I appear to have misspoken. Later on in the song it says:

Go ahead child
Go ahead, be gone with it
And get your sexy on
Go ahead, be gone with it

Now I understand, the kids are meant to be sexy and also objects of sex. Dios Mios man. Was Guarini not available?

Take it to the bridge!