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Justin Bieber

4Paging Chris Brown: Justin Bieber’s Now Being Investigated For Battery

justin bieber

Justin Bieber has most likely never heard the expression “quit while you’re ahead”, or else he would have stopped acting like a smacked ass a long time ago. The Prince of the Puny Chest just keeps doing things to make you wonder if he’s actually Chris Brown in scrawny white Canadian clothing, even following in the older singer’s footsteps when it comes to assault. Apparently, Justin’s been racing his Ferrari down his residential street in Calabasas, CA and when his neighbour brought it up to him, he went off the handle. Oh, f-ck off with this kid.

From TMZ:

Justin Bieber has been accused of battery by a neighbor … and cops are at the singer’s home in Calabasas, CA investigating … TMZ has learned.

Sources tell TMZ …. Justin and one of his male neighbors got into a verbal altercation just after 9 AM.  We’re told the argument was intense.

L.A. County Sheriff’s spokesperson Steve Whitmore tells TMZ … the accuser told deputies Justin made physical contact with him and he has filed a battery report. He also claims Justin threatened him.

One of Justin’s neighbors tells TMZ … the argument between Bieber and the accuser was NOT over a party … it had to do with a Ferrari.

We’re told Bieber had the car delivered to his home last night on a flatbed truck … and this morning, he was racing the vehicle up and down the streets.

Neighborhood sources tell us … the neighbor was furious about the deafening noise AND felt Justin was endangering the community by tearing through the streets at breakneck speeds.

We’re told the neighbor went over to confront Justin about the situation … and that’s when the two sides got into a screaming match.

Considering we’ve seen actual video of Justin’s ability to get violent, I somehow don’t think the neighbour is lying about this. I’d love to say that I can’t wait until this behaviour ends his shitty career, but I think we all know that we live in a society that seems to reward being a total piece of shit, so oh well.

 

March 27, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

11Justin Bieber STILL Hates Shirts

justin bieber airport

Justin Bieber really, really hates shirts and we kind of all hate him for it. We know Olivia Wilde does.

The Biebereeno was seen shirtless in an airport in Lodz, Poland. Naturally he paired his lack of shirt with the saggiest trousers man could create, showing a more than generous strip of the tightest of whitest nether trousers.

When Christina Aguilera tells you to tone it down, it might be time to “rejuvenate and refresh” and put on clothes.

To catch up on any other Bieber dramas you may have missed, here’s a definitive list.

Good to see his nanny is still looking out for him. Gotta be the same guy in the photo above, right? Doesn’t he remind you of a younger, fitter version of Harry, Charlotte’s husband from Sex and the City? Good for him!

justin bieber tantrum

March 26, 2013 at 3:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

2Christina Aguilera Thinks Justin Bieber Needs to Take It Down Several Notches

justin bieber christina aguilera

Justin Bieber‘s already purchased his one way ticket to Dickville, but some of his fellow celebrities seem to be pretty invested in making that a round-trip journey by offering him nuggets of “wisdom” to help him through this difficult time of… being difficult for no f-cking reason. The latest star to reach out a helping hand? Why, none other that former child star and forever queen of the inability to stay on one note, Christina Aguilera.

From Hollyscoop (via The Sun):

“You live life and it’s hard to grow up in front of a camera.

“You learn as you get older to take moments for yourself, step away from the camera, re-inspire yourself as an artist, rejuvenate and refresh.”

Christina also advised the Canadian singer to be more independent and stand up to those who are pushing him around.

She said: “I would tell Bieber, don’t let anything morph you or push you around or have you be something you’re not.

“I’ve always been really honest and true to my own roots and been really grounded, not letting myself stray too much.”

Well, you certainly haven’t been humble, girl. People who brag about being grounded generally aren’t all that much. But that’s neither here nor there. It’s good for anyone to “rejuvenate and refresh” after a long time on any particular career path (or after a work out or particularly hot day – zing!) but Bieber needs to take a permanent hiatus. Go back to making YouTube videos and performing at a local church or something, bro.

March 25, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer

6Justin Bieber’s Raising Hell In Paris Now, Too, I Guess

justin bieber

This little asshole just won’t go away. After nearly causing Britain’s collective heads to explode with his sheer idiocy, Justin Bieber has since moved his Tour of Terror on to mainland Europe. First stop, Paris, where Baby Bieber and Co were apparently asked to leave the Meurice Hotel for having shitty attitudes and inciting riots from his remaining fans.

From Metro:

Justin Bieber has just been kicked out of the Meurice Hotel in Paris,’ Paris based TV and radio presenter Jean-Marc Morandini revealed in his blog on Monday.

‘It was a decision taken by the management of the luxury hotel because of his attitude in the establishment, and because of the nuisance caused by the presence of his fans around the buildings.’

The 19-year-old was slapped with the ban after he and a ‘vast’ entourage booked up a six figure stay at seven suites based over two floors at the ‘Hotel of Kings’, which boasts British royals, US president Franklin D.Roosevelt and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie as former guests.

But within a few hours hundreds of young fans had begun massing outside and even inside the lobby.

A source at the establishment revealed the noise had become ‘intolerable’.

‘There were kids everywhere screaming and shouting, and the other guests just didn’t like it,’ said the insider.

‘Justin was clearly encouraging his fans – that’s something he has to do.’

I can’t believe anyone still cares about Justin Bieber, but then, teenage girls (ones who like Justin Bieber in the first place, that is) are pretty stupid. Apparently the hotel spokesperson followed up the reports by saying that Bieber and his team definitely left super suddenly but they wouldn’t throw him out because that’s not really their policy. Read: “We totally threw him out but we don’t want to deal with the Beliebers. We saw what happened with Olivia Wilde.”

March 19, 2013 at 9:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber

5Justin Bieber And Lindsay Lohan Are Totally Not Friends

lindsay lohan justin bieber

Justin Bieber – of all people – made fun of Lindsay Lohan on Instagram. Apparently this was one stop he had to make on his Justin Bieber Destroys Himself Tour. In a caption on his account, he wrote, “… to those comparing me to Lindsay Lohan look at her 2012 tax statements ;)”

justin bieber instagram(In case you can’t read this, it’s Beebsey going on and on about how awesome he is and “I don’t care if you believe in me” and ending with “I think I’m going pretty damn good. And to those comparing me to Lindsay Lohan look at her 2012 tax statements ;)”

I think we can all agree that the winky face is the most offensive thing here. Apparently, he quickly deleted it but that did nothing.

TMZ reports that Lindsayyyyy was not pleased.

Lindsay is telling friends … it’s too little, too late … and “karma” will bite him in the ass.

We’re told Lindsay feels Bieber’s comments were “senseless and mean” — she’s never had beef with him … and has no idea why he chose to single her out, bullying her on an international platform.

THE AGONY.

The Beebs offered a super speedy Beeby apology. Via TMZ:

My post was only up for a few minutes but I realized right away that what I said at the end was wrong and distracted from what I was trying to say. I immediately deleted it and rewrote it so it would show what I was really feeling and those words are up now.

By “rewrote it” what me means is that he took out all Lohan references.

Justin: don’t apologize. Lindsay: do your taxes. Now everybody go home and get some sleep.

March 15, 2013 at 4:30 am by Catherine St. Ives

5Justin Bieber Blames the Gym and Meanies For His UK Breakdown

justin bieber amsterdam

I think we’re reaching the conclusion of Justin Bieber‘s epic UK breakdown. Let’s do a checklist here, just to recap:

- Cries about the “worst birthday ever” after trying to sneak underage kids into a club and not getting his own way

- Turns up three hours late for his own concert

- Wears ugly outfits on a “dare” then can’t seem to keep his shirt on

- Goes on insane Twitter rant about how rough he has it but won’t listen to the haters

- “Collapses” on stage and goes to the hospital for oxygen and an Instagram selfie session

- Fights with photographer and threatens to “f-cking beat the f-ck out of him”

- Cancels Portuguese concert over “technical equipment loading issues”, aka low ticket sales

- Gets advice from will.i.am

- Takes trip to Amsterdam to get blazed out of his mind and forget about the disastrous last few weeks

That about finishes the cycle, doesn’t it? Now, Justin has already promised (threatened?) UK fans that he’ll return to the country in the future, but he’s also not willing to let things go without setting the record straight. He’s NOT a total asshole, guys, okay? It’s just that he was really tired from working out so hard and because the paparazzi are real meanies!

From Germany’s Bild magazine:

“It was a hard week. I was working out every morning and had a huge show every night,” he told Germany’s Bild.

“When people are pushing their camera in your face all day long and yell mean things at you [it's hard].

“I’m only human, too. I’m far away from home, I miss my family, my siblings and my friends.”

I suppose it is tough when your mother is too busy using your name to sell herself to any area of the entertainment industry that’ll take her to put you over her knee and spank your obnoxious ass back to normalcy. Also, how in the hell does going to the gym – unless you’re taking steroids, I guess? – make you act like a total prick?

Alright, at the end of this entry, we’re now a Bieber-free zone for at least… well, until he gets arrested or deported or something equally as hilarious.

March 13, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Justin Bieber