Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Julia Roberts

Julia Roberts Should Read That Book, ‘Eat, Pray, Shave Your Armpits’

Julia Roberts Has a Natural Look

OK, so I don’t really care if you shave your pits or not. It’s certainly none of my business and it’s not like we didn’t know Julia likes the “tiny kittens tied to the underarm area” look. That’s not news. But I thought this would be an interesting time to open up this can of worms: What do we think about unshaved armpits? I’ve shaved since I’ve needed to and I can’t imagine it’d be very comfortable, but hey! If Julia Roberts prefers living this way, maybe there’s something to it.

Any hairy folks out there who care to share their side of things?

Quotables

“It’s unfortunate that we live in such a panicked, dysmorphic society where women don’t even give themselves a chance to see what they’ll look like as older persons. I want to have some idea of what I’ll look like before I start cleaning the slates. I want my kids to know when I’m pissed, when I’m happy, and when I’m confounded. Your face tells a story… and it shouldn’t be a story about your drive to the doctor’s office.”

- Julia Roberts on the subject of plastic surgery and Botox in the September issue of Elle.

You tell ‘em, Julia.  But while you’re at it, could you possibly clip that quote out of the magazine and glitter glue it to some colorful construction paper and send that to Nicole Kidman? Because she could really use that tip.  And come on, glitter glue makes everybody smile, or, you know, try to, I guess.

Quotables

“Make a nice dinner reservation now, because that’s the biggest night out of the year – says the former hostess – have a nice glass of wine, and take your top off.”

- Julia Roberts tells a reporter how to have a successful Valentine’s Day while promoting Valentine’s Day.

What Do Beloved Screen Actors Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts Think About NBC?

Billy Bush scored an interview with Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts on last night’s Golden Globes red carpet, but the two A-listers had an agenda. After Julia got her obligatory “Happy Birthday, Michelle Obama!” out of the way, Tom realized that he was being interviewed by an NBC reporter. NBC. You know, that network that’s been in the news for sucking and being jerks a lot lately. “Yeah, we got great information from another network”, says Tom. Julia took a moment to realize what he meant by that and then says “Another network? Yeah! NBC, you guys are in the toilet right now.” Bush laughed it off, but you could tell he was unprepared to be sass talked by Tom Hanks and a seemingly buzzed Julia Roberts. Pretty funny.

Julia Roberts Lands New Gig Shilling Make Up

Julia Roberts

Well, I have a feeling it’s going to be “one of those days”. Just being upfront about it. It’s a slow news day so far and I didn’t even get an hour’s sleep last night because there was some crazy fight going on in the apartment next door and then they started doing construction on my street at roughly six AM. I look like I’ve been up all night smoking crack and trust me, I wish that was the truth because at least I’d have an excuse for reporting on Julia Roberts becoming the new Lancôme spokesperson. Oh, look. There are two names I haven’t heard in about six years. Julia Roberts and Lancôme. I think that was the make up my aunts used in the 90s.

From People Magazine:

When it comes to gorgeous, you can’t get better than the original “Pretty Woman.” Lancôme has just announced that Julia Roberts will be their global ambassadress. “By her remarkable personality and career, Julia Roberts is an emblematic woman of her time,” said Youcef Nabi, president of Lancôme International, in a statement. “Her exceptional talent, her radiance and her strong commitments perfectly echo Lancôme’s values. We are convinced she will embody the brand in the most sublime way possible.” The beauty brand remains quiet about additional specifics of her role, but check back for more as details roll in.

Global ambassadress? That’s the most highfalutin job title I’ve ever heard in my life. “Emblematic woman of her time”? Who the hell are they talking about? Joan of Arc or Julia Roberts selling moderately-to-high priced foundations to aging housewives who can still manage to afford that shit in this current economic climate?

Ugh, at least she’s not being a total hypocrite and going with an eco-friendly line that aligns with her pre-established title of Mother Nature. Or something.

Oh, Julia!

51911084juliaroberts93200942939pm1

Leave it to Julia Roberts to piss off an entire temples-worth of Hindus!  She’s in India filming Steal, Your, Husband Eat, Pray, Love despite Beet’s many protestations.  Part of the movie is being filmed in the Hari Mandir temple, located in the town of Pataudi and this presents a problem.

The fall is one of the holiest times of the year for Hindus.  This movie production has prevented worshipers from being able to access their temple during Navratri, a religious festival, and the locals are not happy.

In addition to not being able to visit their house of worship, the security detail surrounding Julia Roberts has been described as “presidential”.  She has a bullet-proof vehicle and helicopter to cart her big mouth around.

Hey, making movies is a big production and someone in town agreed to all this crap.  But since this is Julia Roberts we’re talking about, can we just blame the whole thing on her?