If there’s anything I can’t stand more than poofy-haired, whiny, crooning “racist penis” John Mayer, it’s Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino. So to give The Sitch any credit whatsoever really pains me in a way that I can’t completely convey to you.
The two were photographed at last night’s CMT Music Awards, The Situation looking like something you could wash your clothes on and oil a lawnmower with at the same time, and Mayer looks like he swallowed a small, bloated child. Whole.
Mayer was there to perform onstage with Keith Urban, but I’m still not sure why the cast of Jersey Shore was in attendance. Many would think that’d be like Adolf Hitler kicking it at his neighbor’s bar mitzvah or something. … Oh, wait. I get it now. It was a live televised event that people watch. I guess that was the hook. Gotcha.
Whatever. You know you’re on your way out when a greasy reality TV faux-star puts you to shame.
Both of you fools: Pull your damned shirts down.