Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Jennifer Aniston

Late-Night Links

Howard Stern gets David Arquette to dish on the Brad/Jen split. [INO]

Kate Moss may be a hopeless cocaine addict, but she’s an addict who can sell some clothes. Burberry knows this. [Celeb Warship]

Trust me, if the Kim Kardashian sex tape exists, no one wants it to hit the Internet more than Kim Kardashian. [Bossip]

Father of the Year Kevin Federline announces that the forfeit of his relationship with Sean and Jayden is worth $25M per kid. [The Blemish]

A pregnant Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott hit the press junkets. [Teddy and Moo]

Justin Timberlake takes his face out of Scarlett’s breasts for long enough to issue a formal break-up statement with Cameron Diaz. [Faded Youth]

Spicy Pants from Celebrity Smack is going to be on the radio! Be sure to tune in and listen. [Celebrity Smack]

MK from popbytes has 30 Seconds to Blog for an AOL webcast and he does a fantastic job. [popbytes]

The People’s Choice Awards Happened

There. I said it. Admitting it is half the battle. I’m only sorry that it took me this long.
I don’t have it in me to write anything more interesting about it, really. Cameron looked like she just got done wrestling in the La Brea tar pits. Jennifer Aniston’s breasts finally emerged victorious in the tight race with her chin for the title of “Biggest Thing on Jennifer Aniston’s Body.” I want to put Hayden Panettiere in my pocket and have her with me all day long. I want to return her dress to the table at Pancho’s.
Full list of winners here.

Jolie Will Steal Your Man, Then Welcome a Sitdown

I think we all should fear Angelina Jolie just a little bit. Not in the way that cripples thought, but more like a “I’m pretty sure I’m allergic to nuts. My throat is constricting. This Apple Brown Betty has nuts in it doesn’t it?” sort of thing.

Well, she’s given me a little more reason not to mess with her in an interview with Vogue. Personal aside, why is she doing interviews with Vogue? Aren’t they part of the system? Have they adopted children I’m not aware of? Rant over.

Jolie initially denies that she has met Aniston, but she clarifies herself. “We’ve, like, passed each other and said ‘hi’ briefly, shook hands. But not a real sit-down-and-talk kind of meeting.” Will they have a proper meeting? “That would be her decision, and I would welcome it.”

Sigh. Now I have more questions. What exactly would a proper meeting entail? “Yeah, so anyway, Brad and I are traveling the globe in search of new children we can both take care of. He said life with you was hell. We done here?”

I mean this is a chick who has sported a vial of blood around her neck. I don’t think Jen is looking to grab a quick mochachino. Hell, I’m shocked she even survived the hand shake.

Late-Night Links

Jennifer Aniston leaves an L.A. club through the back door with none other than Kevin Federline. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! [Celebitchy]

Sharon Stone outrages and offends the population of Norway. “Now you know how we feel,” says the population of America. [Perez Hilton]

Pam Anderson got naked in front of a camera, because that’s how she spends her time when she’s not getting married impulsively. [Agent Bedhead]

Since her 2003 arrest for heroin possession, Nicole Richie has apparently lost an inch of height and five pounds. Also, she’s black now. [Mollygood]

Queen Latifah and her girlfriend, trainer Jeanette Jenkins, are reportedly jogging towards splitsville. But, hey, at least she’s jogging. [Bossip]

Paris and Nicky Hilton having an ass-slappin’ good time in the back of a limo. [Egotastic]

Early Evening Links

Can you believe I got these things up before 10 pm?? GO ME!!!

Jennifer Hudson needs additional media training. [Defamer]

Mario Lopez and Dancing with the Stars partner Katrina Smirnoff are doing the horizontal tango, if you know what I mean. [MollyGood]

Reese Witherspoon(‘s breasts) look amazing at the Kennedy Center Honors. [Yeeeah!]

Jen and Vince’s reps join forces to put the final nail in the Vaughniston coffin: “Jennifer and Vince mutually agreed to end their relationship.” The reps admit the two broke up in October, after Jen visited Vince in London. So, you know, right around when the blogosphere said they did. [Dirty Laundry]

Paul Walker has no need for talent. Good thing, too. [Celebrity Smack]

Scarlett Johansson: “Please masturbate to me. I want you to. I need you to. Do it three, four, five times a day. Before bed, in the morning, at the office, at your children’s day care, between rounds of golf, in front of your girlfriend, at your mother’s house, in the boss’s office, in the cafeteria, onto the mashed potatoes, anywhere, everywhere, I don’t care, just as long as you’re masturbating to me.” [Agent Bedhead]

Lance Bass says that he and Reichen are still trying to work things out. He made the statement via MySpace, which is totally Hollywood’s hottest PR agency right now. [ICYDK]

Photos from Johnny Depp’s first wedding in 1983. [popbytes]

What Sucks and Costs $250 Million?

This is older news but you haven’t heard about it yet. A friend mentioned this to me and I had to track it down for you, the adoring public. I’m about to blow your mind. Ready?

Evan Almighty could cost as much as $250 million U.S. dollars to make. That’s million with an M. As in one quarter of a Billion dollars.

You may be scratching your head as to what exactly Evan Almighty is. It’s the sequel to Bruce Almighty, the one where Morgan Freeman was God and Jim Carrey put a definitive end to his comedy film career. The movie was okay, and it was cool because Jennifer Aniston played a tree. Oh, she didn’t? My bad.

But back to the budget, according to the article the film has run over on costs because:

a) it’s a “spectacle fantasy and also a comedy.”

b) the “studio’s desire to release the film during the holiday season in December, thereby cutting preparation time and forcing the crew to shoot scenes in Virginia during a rainy period.”

c) “Producers also encountered delays having to film hundreds of animals.”

Okay, now I get it. They had to deal with pricey rain, it’s a fantasy, and they had animals. It’s like Singles mixed with Jumanji so you can see why it would cost bank and a half. I won’t get into why they’ve decided special effects are relevant to a comedy because I know what really happened to the money and that’s a much more compelling story.

Tijuana hookers, eight thousand pounds of blow, and the crazy “money bonfire” party that helped the cast and crew pass away those lonely Virginia nights.