Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Howard Stern

He’s Off the Market Ladies…

Last night Howard Stern and Beth Ostrosky made it official at Le Cirque promising to love, honor and tan together ’til a violated pre-nup do them part.  An over-surgeried 50 something marrying an 18 years his junior model…revolutionary! 

Other wedding highlights:  Sarah Silverman’s ass is a handrest for Jimmy Kimmel, Joan Rivers’ collarbone cracked by massive overload of QVC jewelry, John Stamos can be my Uncle Jesse anytime but only if he’s the perverted kind, Chevy Chase is old and bride raises hand ‘cuz she’s Sure.  Billy Joel continues to be a complete fucking bridge troll and Barbara Walters searches Le Cirque’s parking lot in hopes of locating her lost hairline.

Alanis Takes the Gloves Off

Well, Leo and I are safely in NYC, checked into our gorgeous hotel room in Chelsea, where Leo promptly pooped in front of the bellhop and then knocked his food bowl all over the room. I was like, “Uh, he’s not normally like this …” He was pretty quiet on the plane flight but I think the whole thing has been stressful for him. Maybe he just misses the cats, ha ha!

Anyway I was thrilled to find this clip of Alanis Morissette on Howard Stern. She won’t go so far as to actually talk shit about Ryan Reynolds, but there’s certainly the implication that she thinks he’s a worthless piece of shit. You know, I kind of like how this whole thing has really knocked Alanis down a peg. I was getting really sick of her whole “I’m so spiritual and life is beautiful and don’t you wish you were this spiritual?” act. She admits herself in this interview that the whole thing worked great in philosophy but not so hot in practice. But she’s much easier to listen to in interviews now that she seems to have realized that she’s every bit as human as anybody else.