Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Fran Drescher

Guess Who Was Abducted By Aliens?

photo of fran drescher book pictures 2012 abducted by aliens scar pics
Fran Drescher. Explains so much, right? Honestly, hasn’t she always kind of struck you as some weird other-world science project, what with that nasal voice and weird, rambling walk of hers? Doesn’t it just make *sense* that, long ago, aliens visited Franny the Nanny, took her up to the wide expanse of outer space in their big old starship and probed her with a variety of … I don’t know, probe-like things? And that those things probably made her the way she is today? Because it’s probably, more than likely, true. Check it out, from the Huff Po:

“You know, it’s funny because Peter (Fran’s ex-husband) and I both saw [aliens] before we knew each other, doing the same thing, driving on the road with our dads. We were both in junior high. A few years later, we met, and we realized that we had the same experience. I think that somehow we were programmed to meet. We both have this scar. It’s the exact same scar on the exact same spot.”

But ex-husband Peter Marc Jacobson wasn’t so convinced of the couple’s extraterrestrial pasts. He says Fran got the small scar on her hand from a a drill bit or burning herself holding a hot cup of water. But Fran says, no way.

“I said to him, that’s what the aliens programmed us to think. But really, that’s where the chip is.”

So, is she for real? Hell if I know. She might think she is, and I’m not negating the possibility that she was, in fact, once abducted by extra-terrestrials, but using this in an effort to explain away the fact of being unknowingly-married to a gay man for two decades? I think that’s where this story really gets its shot of reality: “But mom, it’s not my fault I married a gay man – the aliens made me do it.”

Fran Drescher Is Serious About Senate Gig

As I told you days ago, Fran Drescher’s publicist confirmed today that the actress is serious about becoming the next junior senator from New York. The publicist cited Fran’s experience as an actress, advocate for women’s health and public diplomacy envoy for the U.S. State Department.

Her competition looks to be Caroline Kennedy and New York Attorney General Andrew Cuomo. New York Governor David Patterson will appoint a successor if Hillary Clinton is appointed Secretary of State, which looks to be likely.

I wonder how much Fran will have to donate to Governor Patterson’s campaign fund to get this job. Or does that shit only happen in Chicago?

Did I mention that I totally support this??

Because I do.

Is Fran Drescher Gunning for Hillary’s Spot in the Senate???

It sure looks that way!

“I’ve just been given the appointment of U.S. diplomat,” she said at a party for Le Cirque: A Table in Heaven at that restaurant on December 3. “My title is public diplomacy envoy for women’s health issues, and I just got back from a four-country European tour of duty. I believe next I’ll be sent to the Middle East.” Also an anti-cancer activist, Drescher has been considering a run for office. “I’ve been very successful in getting a bill passed in Washington,” she said. “I was thinking I’d take the next four years to lay some groundwork, but I’m throwing my hat in the ring.” What else makes her a good candidate? “I’m an authentic and honest person,” she said. “And I think Capitol Hill needs more of that.”

You know what?

Fuck yeah.

I actually quite love Fran Drescher. I think it would be awesome to see her run for Senate. Good luck with this, gorgeous.

Menage a Trois!

Rosie O’Donnell poses with her partner (wife?) Kelli Carpenter and Fran Drescher at Rosie’s Gala in NYC on Monday night.

I don’t have much to say about this, except for that Fran Drescher always looks fantastic. She has really aged well.

Also: I am firmly opposed to any sort of ban on gay marriage, as you all know by now. A ban on pantsuits on the red carpet, though? I’d vote for that shit.