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Dolly Parton

1Quotables: Dolly Parton Never Wanted Kids

photo of dolly parton pictures photos

“I think I became more productive through not having children. I never really had the desire to have them. My husband didn’t want them either, so it worked out well. … I’ve never been pregnant, so I just feel God didn’t mean for me to have kids, so that everybody else’s children could be mine. But if I had had them, I think I’d have been a devoted mother. My songs are like my children – I expect them to support me when I’m old!”

Dolly Parton, even though she claims to dress to please her husband (?), comes out with a rather “feminist” notion that a woman doesn’t have to have children to be complete. Are you hearing this, NADYA SULEMAN?

August 15, 2011 at 12:30 pm by Sarah
Filed Under: Dolly Parton

2Somebody Left A Baby Named Jolene in A Box on Dolly Parton’s Doorstep

A photo of Dolly Parton

Well, in the 70′s. Somebody left a baby named Jolene in a box on Dolly Parton‘s doorstep in the 70′s. Which, personally, makes it about a zillion times more acceptable*. People were crazy back then, I hear.

Here’s the story, straight from Dolly herself:

“Years ago, when I first started being a big star, I had fans that were fanatical. It was when ‘Jolene’ was a big hit,” said Parton.

“We came home one day and there was a baby in a box at our gate with a note in it. The note said, ‘My name is Jolene, my momma has left me here and she wants you to have me’. Of course, we all freaked out!”

“It wasn’t like it was a kitten or a puppy dog. It was a baby named Jolene!”

Parton, who is due to play in Chicago on Thursday, said she contacted Human Services about the abandoned child and never knew what happened after authorities took the youngster away.

Really though, how flawless is Dolly Parton? I’ve always thought that, and now it turns out that she helped rescue poor little girls named Jolene in the 70′s. What can’t Dolly do? Where’s Dolly’s comic book?

*I’m kidding, of course. Don’t leave babies on doorsteps anytime.

August 1, 2011 at 2:30 pm by Emily
Filed Under: Dolly Parton

1Dolly Parton Raps

Do you really need anything other than that? Really? Dolly Parton, the queen herself, doing some freestyling? I’m sorry, are you dead inside?

Ok, fine, here are some of the lovely lyrics from TMZ:

[on the subject of Queen Latifah]
“She’s the queen of her own hood …
but I’m the queen of Dollywood!”

“I don’t hip and I don’t hop …
I’d black both eyes with this big top.”

“I know the Queen has got ‘em too …
… but she don’t work ‘em like I do!”

So I guess this day has a happy ending after all, huh?

July 25, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Emily
Filed Under: Dolly Parton

2Quotables: Dolly Parton Tells It Like It Is

A photo of Dolly Parton

“I’d love to do a duet, always wanted to work with Madonna, but she never asked. [Madonna and GaGa are] the perfect fit. I’m as outrageous as they are. I was gaudy before they were gaudy.”

You know, I never thought about this before, but I think Dolly Parton is onto something here.  If you look at Dolly throughout the years, of course she’s always been outrageous and gaudy – that’s her charm.  However, I absolutely love Dolly Parton, and I obviously don’t feel the same way about Lady Gaga or Madonna, and I think a lot of you are in that same boat.

Is it Dolly’s country charm that makes her more likable?  Maybe it’s because she has a magical theme park a couple of hours down the road from me. Or maybe it’s because she’s done songs like “Jolene” and “Coat of Many Colors” instead of nonsense like “Judas” and whatever Madonna does nowadays.

How do you guys feel?  Is Dolly better than Gaga and Madonna (of course), did she pave the way for these ladies (maybe), and should she do a duet with either of them (definitely not at all, not even a little. Stick to Kenny Rogers, Dolly.  Don’t be gross)?

May 30, 2011 at 11:30 am by Emily

2The Many Faces of Dolly Parton

Dolly Parton is one of those celebrities that manages to look 20 years younger than her real age while also looking 20 years older than her real age. How come? It’s cause the lady loves to get work done (of the 9-5 variety and the other kind, too.) Fake tatas, face lifts, botox and a possible nose job seem like what she’s had done to me, but maybe you’ll be able to spot some signs of surgery that I wasn’t able to pick up on.

There’s no doubt that Dolly’s a beautiful lady, but wouldn’t it be nice if we knew what her real face looks like?

March 23, 2011 at 5:30 pm by Molls
Filed Under: Dolly Parton

8Welcome Back to Hollywood, Dolly Parton!

Well, ok, Dolly was in a couple episodes of Hannah Montana, and she’s done a couple of other TV shows, but it’s been a hell of a long time since she did an actual movie, or at least since she’s done anything on the level of Steel Magnolias. But that’s all about to change, because Dolly is set to star alongside Queen Latifah in a new movie called Joyful Noise.  Yes and yes.

Here’s the synopsis:

“[Joyful Noise] centers on an unlikely partnership between two strong-minded women who are forced to work together to save a small town gospel choir after budget cuts threaten to shut them down. Latifah will play a no-nonsense mother put in charge of the choir after the untimely death of the choir director. Her character’s faced with the challenges of raising two teens while her husband is away in the military and getting the choir ready for a national competition if she hopes to keep the program afloat. Parton will play the widow of the choir director who had assumed she would take her late husband’s position of leading the choir.”

All right, I’m going to take a moment to explain my unreasonable excitement.  I’m from Tennessee, and the way I see it, there are two kinds of people from Tennessee (well, there are a lot of kinds of people from Tennessee, but stay with me):  Elvis people and Dolly Parton people.  Being from the end of the state opposite from Graceland, I fall strongly in Dolly Parton’s camp.  I can’t remember a holiday when I haven’t watched A Smoky Mountain Christmas, and I couldn’t even begin to count the number of trips I’ve made to Dollywood. Dolly just has this special, sincere quality about her, and there’s something about her that feels like home.

Production starts in January, so the movie is a while away, but I’m going to start getting psyched now.  Is anyone with me?

August 23, 2010 at 11:00 am by Emily
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