Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Courtney Stodden

COURTNEY STODDEN BOUGHT NEW SHOES.

Oh man. The shoes. The new shoes. Guys, they’re not any better than the old shoes (well, except for the fact that you can’t see her gnarled-up toes or the spray tan stains on the clear areas of the straps), and quite frankly, I don’t even understand these shoes. This particular style of shoe isn’t even comprehensible as a joke, let alone a “Hey, I’mma seriously wear these and YOU TAKE ME SERIOUS OR ELSE.”

I’m torn, friends. I don’t know if I should give the girl a hearty pat on the back for finally girling up and buying a pair of shoes that actually conceal the feet, or if I should give the girl a hearty pat on the back of the head for possibly going from bad to worse.

Decisions, decisions.

Guess Courtney Stodden Didn’t Get Rid of Those Shoes After All. Huh.

photo of courtney stodden and doug hutchison recent news pictures
Ugh. Is it me or does Doug Hutchison just get nastier-looking and nastier-looking as the days go by? Because man. He does.

This is Courtney Stodden, wearing the original ho shoes (and matching plastic ho bra!) to an event for ‘Muay Thai in America: In Honor of the King’, which was some kind of mixed martial arts event held in Los Angeles over the weekend.

Here’s another view of just Courtney—you don’t have Doug’s nastiness to detract from the full effect of Courtney’s lovely ensemble:

photo of courtney stodden pictures heels plastic lucite stripper pic
And OK, fine, one more for posterity (and because it’s the best of all):

photo of courtney stodden pictures
I think, in this one, if you look closely enough you might actually see what Courtney had for dinner. I could be wrong, but I somehow doubt it.

Yeah, girl.

Courtney Stodden’s Mom Would Be, Like, Devastated if Courtney Ever Did Porn

photo of courtney stodden pictures
Which I, like, totally don’t understand, considering Courtney’s mother herself practically sold Courtney to Doug Hutchison for a song and a pair of shitty Lucite heels. Which were regifted.

On the most recent episode of ‘Couples Therapy’, Courtney’s mom, Krista, was interviewed, and she talked all about Courtney and Doug and (more Doug) and opportunities for Courtney to get naked and/or f-cked for cash down the road, and she all but broke down in dollar signs tears. This is what Krista had to say:

“I do not ever want to see her do, like, pornography. I would be so heartbroken and so upset at that. … I [also] don’t want people seeing her with no clothes on, I’m a mother!”

Courtney, however, had this to say about showing her nips off for public consumption:

“I feel, like, if something is tastefully done, in black or white, or you know, you’re doing something that you would normally do or naturally do when you’re in the nude [Ed. Note: you mean like sex, Courtney? Sex? I mean, sex is done naturally when you're in the nude, and hell, sometimes you don't even need to be completely nude in order to have sex], that could be classy and tastefully done, um …”

And then Courtney trailed off, making just as less sense as ever.

But hey. Would you pay to see Courtney nude? I guess that’s the biggest question here, guys, would you do it?

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