Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Countess LuAnn De Lesseps

‘Real Housewives of New York’ Luann de Lesseps Premieres New Single & It’s Amazing

girl code

I’m not quite sure if you remember this, but five years ago, a wonderful song came into this world called “Money Can’t Buy You Class”. It was by none other than Real Housewives of New York City star and former countess Luann de Lesseps, and it was fucking amazing. And yes, that strong language is warranted. The fact that this woman thought coming out with a song was a good idea was incredible enough on its own, but then to have the song be so ridiculous? I mean, it was heaven on earth. Now, we’ve been given another gift from Luann in the form of her new single, “Girl Code”, and I’m afraid to love it too much, lest it all be an act of trickery. I don’t want to dream too big.

Luann performed “Girl Code” on Watch What Happens Live this week and frankly, I’m not sure if whoever made the recording messed up the video or if Luann is really that off-time with the song. Either way, I don’t care, because this is pure brilliance yet again. Here’s a little lyric sampling if you’re considering NOT pressing play (which would be a big mistake):

Don’t be so uncool 
You broke the girl code 
I gotta let you go 
I’m just doing me
You broke the girl code 
So don’t be so uncool 
I gotta let you go

Ugh, too true, Luann. Too true.

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Hallelujah! The Real Housewives of NYC Have Signed a New Contract!

real housewives of nyc

Things were not looking good for the future of The Real Housewives of New York City earlier this week when contract disputes held up the beginning of production on season six. Basically, they wanted fat ass raises and banded together to get them, but Bravo basically told them to figure it out by May 10 or hit the unemployment line. That threat apparently lit a fire under their asses and they’re all on board.

From Deadline:

The Real Housewives of New York salary stand off with Bravo is over. Ramona Singer, Carole Radziwill, LuAnn de Lesseps, Heather Thomson, Sonja Morgan and Aviva Drescher today all signed their contracts with the cable channel I’ve learned. Details are sketchy but it seems the Housewives took the modest pay increases Bravo was offering for season 6 rather than continue to hold out for big raises and risk getting booted off the Big Apple version of the multi-city reality franchise. The cable channel also threw in a few more contractual baubles like covering expenses for additional hair and make-up for the cast.

Ugh, stop. Season 5 of RHONYC was the lowest rated in the show’s history and these women are still acting like they’ve got some leverage. That being said, thank f-ck they got this worked out because I love this show (even though I only binge watch it when there’s marathons on) and the world needs more trash like this on TV.

In any case, when things come crashing down on this show because they want $8 million an episode or something stupid and they’re finally told to take a hike, I hope we can all remember this very important lesson:

Countess LuAnn’s Daughter Was Caught Droppin’ N-Bombs and Rollin’ Up a Fattie

This is really dishy shit. So, you know Victoria de Lesseps, Countess LuAnn from Real Housewives of New York’s daughter? Well, yesterday another Real Housewife, Ramona Singer, retweeted a video that was sent to her by a fan. In the five minute clip, Victoria is seen rolling up what appears to be either a joint or a cigarette (but who the hell rolls cigarettes anymore?) and saying the N-word. The video, which has already been removed from YouTube, was a recorded conversation between Victoria and a friend on Skype.

Her friend has since defended Victoria and said that she uses the N-word like one might use the word “pal” and doesn’t view it as a racial slur. As if that really makes any kind of difference.

Ramona’s decision to put her co-star’s teenage daughter on blast is pretty lame (leaving kids out of your adult drama seems like the only classy thing to do,) but Victoria’s offenses are serious. They’ve covered on the show that Victoria attends some fancy schmancy boarding school. I wonder if this behavior is something she picked up there or if maybe that’s the reason she was shipped off in the first place. Now that I think of it, she did have a broken arm at the beginning of season two, allegedly for trying to sneak out of her Hamptons bedroom balcony to meet her friends. Probably to smoke pot, now that I think of it.

I Just Watched Countess LuAnn’s Video And I Was Expecting Her To Whip Her Dick Out of Her Dress The Whole Time

Dear God. You might not be ready for this, but here goes: Real Housewife Countess LuAnn’s music video for “Money Can’t Buy You Class” has hit the webs and sweet Jesus! I’m stunned simply stunned.

First of all, LuAnn looks gorgeous. And not even for a drag queen. She just looks absolutely gorgeous and I need to give her that. But the weirdness? Yeah. She definitely brings all the weirdness we’re used to with her except in this video it’s on a level we’ve never seen. Between the seductive camera stares (she has two teenage children! I’d die if my mother took on a vanity project like this when I was 15!) and the groping up and feeling up of 20-something men, it’s a little much. And of course the traditional campiness that you’ve come to expect from a Real Housewives musical production is breaking records here as well.

I just hope that this is the final nail in her singing career’s coffin. I don’t want to go through another season of this show with LuAnn thinking she has a right to sing and put albums out. This just isn’t fair.