“I was sitting with Courtney Love, and she might’ve saved me from a fight. I’m not going to say ass-whipping . . . But you never know—he’s hanging out with Guy Ritchie. Those guys go at it. She kind of barked, or was growling, and that was it.”

- Chris Rock explaining how, after making Jude Law mad at the 2005 Oscars, Courtney Love came to his defense and prevented a brawl from going down.

Man, I love it when real behind-the-scenes dirt comes out years after it happened. Can you imagine a better image than Courtney Love standing between Chris Rock and Jude Law, barking and growling? Obviously you can because it’s the best mental image ever. I may get that scene tattooed on my shoulder blades.

“People are defending Roman Polanski because he made good movies 30 years ago? Are you kidding me? Even Johnny Cochran didn’t have the nerve to go, ‘Well did you see OJ play against New England?’”

– Chris Rock on The Jay Leno Show

For whatever reason, Chris Rock took his grandmother to sit courtside and watch the Knicks play the Pacers on Friday. Granny looks like she knows way more about sports than I do. She knows when to clap! I always clap at the wrong time. I’m all like “FUCK YEAH WHO’S BOSS NOW???” and whatever poor soul is at the game with me is like, “Uh, that was the other team scoring. Have another beer and shut up please.”

Grandparents are the cutest.

My grandfather actually sent a package of Hannukah gelt (and pens! Grandpa loves pens!) to Wendie’s kiddos, as promised, and she uploaded the video of them opening it to her personal website, and it was just so cute. I showed it to my grandfather today, and his face lit up. I wanted to make a video of my grandpa watching the video of Wendie’s kids opening his presents. Kind of like the reaction videos to the reaction videos to the 2 Girls 1 Cup thing, except with way less vomiting (and NO I AM NOT GOING TO LINK TO THAT MADNESS). Anyway, you can watch the vid of Wendie’s kids here. The whole thing is just unbelievably precious and I’m beside myself with the wonderfulness of grandparents and small children right now.

Oh, and also, Grandpa Sam is soooo excited about all the comments you guys left him on his birthday post. He was like “Did you see that I’m an international celebrity now? People left comments from other countries! You’ve made me a star overseas!” He was just so happy about all of it. My younger cousins, who are in high school right now, didn’t even know that he fought in the war, so they read it and were all like “Grandpa Sam fought in a war???” and it gave him an opportunity to regale these teenage boys with his war stories (“I lived in a tent for 18 months!”), and really everybody was just so delighted about the whole thing. So thank you, all of you guys, for the wonderful messages you left for Grandpa Sam. You really made this a special birthday for him, and I am forever indebted to you.

Oh, there are just so many elements to this story, and all I want to do is take a nap.

But remember Kevin Powell from Season One of The Real World?

He’s running for Congress in New York. Yes, it’s true.

So he had a big fundraiser scheduled for Wednesday night at a Manhattan club, and Dave Chappelle was scheduled to show up to perform. Guess who never showed up? Yeah.

Earlier, Powell had urged the crowd to bear with him, suggesting that the comedian was “on his way.” But as the 700 campaign contributors grew restless and the vast press contingent started asking questions, Powell made his admission that Chappelle actually would not be appearing. He blamed travel mix-ups.

“We were on the phones non-stop with Dave’s management to get him here,” said a contrite Powell, 42, who promised that campaign donors would get into his next celebrity event for free.

Powell also claimed that comedian Chris Rock was actually backstage to show his support for the underdog’s hip-hop-themed campaign , but Rock never took the stage — “out of respect [for] other comedians,” Powell said.

Does Dave Chappelle ever show up for anything these days?

The photo’s of candidate Powell and Chris Rock, who apparently did show up, at the event.

Thank God!

STATESBORO, Georgia (AP) — Chris Rock has asked a Georgia court to start paternity proceedings to determine if he’s the father of a 13-year-old boy whose mother tried to file a paternity lawsuit against the actor and comedian last month.

Now realize Rock didn’t have to do this. The court had thrown out the original claim by the mother because Rock is a New Jersey resident. So he could have waited until the justice system finally hunted him down, as they will Ed Murphy, but he decided to be pro-active on his possible children. Weird, eh? Actually wanting to know if the kid is yours, and wanting to provide financial support (emotional support, at this point, 13 years later, seems far fetched) if it is. This is almost like an adult decision, and I don’t know what to make of it.

Chris Rock, we salute you!

Thanks to the guys at Bossip for the heads-up.