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Chris Brown

Surprise! Chris Brown Lied About Doing Community Service

The world is an unjust place where children are starving, senseless wars are destroying countries and killing people and the walking shit stain known as Chris Brown hasn’t had his ass beaten raw before being thrown away to rot in a jail cell for all of eternity. After narrowly escaping charges from Frank Ocean for jumping him in a studio parking lot, however, he may still be in trouble with the law for violating his probation by lying about actually doing any community service.

From TMZ:

Bryan T. Norwood, the Chief of Police in Richmond, VA., wrote a letter to the judge on September 14, claiming Brown successfully completed 202 days of community service — he was only required to perform 180.

Norwood attached documents showing that Brown frequently worked at Tappahannock Children’s Center — a place where Brown’s mom was once a director — and did odd jobs such as painting, washing windows, waxing floors, cutting grass and picking up trash.

That’s all fine and well, except guess what! He actually only turned up nine or ten times and was never supervised by anyone since the detective who was assigned to oversee the community service was told to get lost. Instead, Shit Stain’s mother filled in the times, location and types of work Chris did to the court. Yeah, because that’s not at all suspect. What’s more, the District Attorney says that Chris had a “prior relationship” with the Chief of Police, possibly making all this even more f-cked up:

And there’s more. According to the docs, Chris’ lawyer, Mark Geragos, “instructed” the lawyer for the Richmond P.D. on how to “handle” D.A. investigators’ questions about Chris’ community service.

And Geragos told the probation officer there was a court order that Chris’ community service be removed from the probation department and given to the police chief. Fact is … there was no such court order.

Chris Brown never fails to continually prove what an absolute scumbag he is. When will someone throw this animal in a cage and toss the key?

Frank Ocean Is Classy, Won’t Press Charges On Chris Brown

Don’t expect much coverage of the walking skidmark on humanity’s underwear that is Chris Brown here at Evil Beet now that I’m running the joint. Before he hit the spotlight, I never knew it was possible to hold so much ire for someone you’ve never met. Everything he does disgusts me, as does the way he looks, speaks, tweets, sings… need I go on? So this story isn’t really about him so much as it is about Frank Ocean, Brown’s polar opposite in every way: he’s a talented musician, he doesn’t hit women or hate gay people and he’s what seems to be a really lovely guy.

We all know the tale by now: late last month, Brown attacked Ocean outside an LA recording studio when Ocean apparently “disrespected” Brown by refusing to shake his hand. Well, you know what they say – if you can’t shake hands, ball them into fists and beat people with them. That’ll really prove to the world that you’re a reformed character! While most people would be eager to get all litigious on Satan’s human form, Ocean is taking the high road and basically just wants to leave it behind him and move on with his life because, you know, assholes never change and it’s not worth stooping to Brown’s level.

From Frank’s Tumblr:

“As a child I thought if someone jumped me it would result in me murdering or mutilating a man. But as a man I am not a killer. I’m an artist and a modern person. I’ll choose sanity. No criminal charges. No civil lawsuit. Forgiveness, albeit difficult, is wisdom. Peace, albeit trite, is what I want in my short life. Peace.”

You’re not only an artist and a modern person, Frank, you’re also someone the likes of Chris Brown could take a few lessons from.

Rihanna Talks About Chris Brown in Rolling Stone Even Though It’s No One’s Business

photo of rihanna rolling stone pictures, photos
From Rolling Stone:

Rihanna has opened up like never before about getting back together with her ex-boyfriend, Chris Brown, and what it means for her public image.

“I decided it was more important for me to be happy,” she tells contributing editor Josh Eells in the new issue of Rolling Stone, out Friday, January 31st. “I wasn’t going to let anybody’s opinion get in the way of that. Even if it’s a mistake, it’s my mistake. After being tormented for so many years, being angry and dark, I’d rather just live my truth and take the backlash. I can handle it.”

The couple’s public reconciliation comes less than four years since Brown assaulted Rihanna the night before the 2009 Grammy Awards. Brown plead guilty to assault and performed community service, but he remains on probation.

“When you add up the pieces from the outside, it’s not the cutest puzzle in the world,” Rihanna says. “You see us walking somewhere, driving somewhere, in the studio, in the club, and you think you know. But it’s different now. We don’t have those types of arguments anymore. We talk about shit. We value each other. We know exactly what we have now, and we don’t want to lose that.”

And Rihanna says that if Brown were ever to display a hint of his past behavior towards her, she is ready to walk.

“He doesn’t have the luxury of f–king up again,” she says. “That’s just not an option. I can’t say that nothing else will ever go wrong. But I’m pretty solid in the knowing that he’s disgusted by that. And I wouldn’t have gone this far if I ever thought that was a possibility.”

Ooh, Chris Brown doesn’t have the luxury of f-cking up again. I’m sure that’s going to be in the forefront of his mind when he goes off on a rage-filled explosion of fists and teeth—I’m sure he’s going to be thinking, “Oh, wait, that’s right; I don’t have the luxury of f-cking up again, but I do have the luxury of boning another silly chick with self-esteem issues, so there’s that, too.”

Later on in the interview, she insinuates that Chris should have been pretty broken up about losing her the first time around—or at least, that’s what she was intending by keeping her distance for a few weeks to start:

“I wanted him to know what it felt like to lose me. To feel the consequences of that. So when that (stuff) came back it hit me like a ton of bricks. Like, God, you’ve got to be kidding right now. But I got real with myself, and I just couldn’t bury the way I felt.”

In short? This girl is a complete idiot. Lena Dunham got it right—Rihanna’s just dumb and pathetic. That’s all.