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Chris Brown

4Chris Brown’s Probation Revoked, But He’s Still Not In Jail

chris brown

Chris Brown is a dickhead of the highest order (and is currently training up Justin Bieber to follow in his footsteps), and frankly he should have been in prison a long ass time ago. After he assaulted Rihanna. After he assaulted any number of people, really. And yet here he is, free as a bird, out there in the world to assault more people and get away with it. Ain’t life grand?

It seemed as if the tides were turning this week when Superior Court Judge James R Brandlin decided on Monday to revoke Chris’ probation following his most recent assault charge in DC, according to The AP. He’s still got to go to rehab and do a shit ton of community service, which he’ll probably lie about again, but for some reason no one requested for him to be arrested???? Is this not how things work? I assumed when one was on probation and then they break that probation REPEATEDLY and then a judge revokes it, that means your ass is about to be behind bars. When did the law change? Anyone?

The judge is going to set out an “arrest report” (whatever that means) later this week and Chris will have to return to court in February 2014 to update them on his progress. I DON’T GET WHY HE’S NOT IN JAIL. It’s like we’ve rewarded him for assaulting another person by taking away his probation, meaning there are literally no conditions on this guy. Can’t wait til he goes out and kills someone. Maybe we can give him 1,000 more hours of community service then.

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December 18, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Chris Brown

13Chris Brown Has Been Ordered Back to Rehab

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Chris Brown has been having a bit of a rough time lately, eh? After his most recent misdemeanor assault charge, someone on his management team got smart and decided it was time for him to go to rehab to confront some of his anger issues. Of course, he didn’t stay there very long and in fact left after about two weeks. I personally don’t see a problem with that. After all, two weeks is more than enough time to change your violent, homophobic ways and become a well-adjusted, law-abiding member of society. What’s the problem here?

Well, there is clearly a problem as Chris hit court on Wednesday for a progress hearing on his 2009 “I beat Rihanna but I’m over it and you should be too” case, and a judge decided that, considering how he beat someone up in DC last month, he probably has some more serious issues to work on and he needs to head back to rehab for another 90 days. While there, he’ll have to undergo drug tests as well as taking any prescription drugs provided to him by the rehab staff. A tranquilizer, maybe?

Here’s E! Online‘s roundup:

Agreeing with the recommendation of the probation department, L.A. Superior Court Judge James Brandlin ordered the singer to spend another three months in a residential treatment facility, submit to drug testing and take medication as prescribed by his doctor.

Brown is also required to complete 24 hours of community service a week during the course of his time in rehab.

I wish we could lock this asshole up and throw away the key. Just make sure to put his buddy Bieber in there with him before you lock it up.

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November 21, 2013 at 6:30 am by Jennifer
Filed Under: Chris Brown

1Chris Brown Thrown Out Of Rehab For Violent Act


Chris Brown, are you KIDDING me??? So you know how Chris Brown went to rehab for anger management? Wanna know why he left?

He was kicked out of the program for throwing a f-cking ROCK at his MOM’S car. Are serious, Chris Brown?? You’re a grown man.

From TMZ:

We just got hold of the probation report in the Rihanna case, which outlines what happened during his 13 days in a Malibu rehab joint for anger management counseling.

According to the report, Chris’ mom showed up for a family session and was urging her son to stay in the facility for extended treatment. Apparently, Chris violently disagreed with her and in a fit of anger threw a rock through her car window, shattering it.

The report goes on to say without continued therapy and a strong recovery support network, Probation says his prognosis is “very guarded.”

Is Chris Brown unaware that there are other ways to solve issues than resorting violence? Did he miss this lesson in kindergarten? I can’t even. Let’s just say my hopes for his outpatient rehabilitation are not high.

This guy is still considered a huge celebrity and still gets work, by the way. Just let that sink in.

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November 20, 2013 at 5:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Chris Brown

2Chris Brown Is Out Of Rehab

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Chris Brown has been quiet lately, and that’s only because he’s been in rehab. He was getting some anger management into his life, after assaulting someone in D.C.. But his rep promises that even though Brown is out of rehab, he’s still working on his issues. Suuuuure. Here’s the report, from E Online:

Chris is continuing his rehab program as an outpatient and is also completing his community service in the Los Angeles area. He appreciates all of your encouragement and support.

LOL why does that last bit sound sarcastic to me?

Well anyway, let’s hope for EVERYONE’S sake that the rehab and continued work and community service helped and will still help Brown with his many, many issues.

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November 14, 2013 at 4:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Chris Brown

1Someone Finally Taking Control of Chris Brown’s Career; Checks Him Into Rehab


Chris Brown just got arrested for assaulting someone in D.C.. Guy is still effed up, but I it looks like someone out there is finally saying, “This guy is out of control, no for realsies.” Because Brown is checking into rehab for anger management. Here’s the scoop from TMZ:

Chris Brown has just entered a rehab facility for anger management issues … presumably to deal with his temper problems and to blunt a possible prison sentence.

Sources tell TMZ … Brown’s attorney, Mark Geragos, just dropped him off at a facility in Malibu.

So good job, team Brown, for making one smart career move within the last 4 years. As for his latest court case, he was released from jail and got his charge reduced to a misdemeanor (down from a felony) but he’s still not in the clear. He could face up to 4 years in prison for violating his probation.

Fingers crossed? Or maybe cross them in hopes that this rehab will help, but I don’t think it helps unless the person actually wants to get help, and I think it’s pretty clear he doesn’t give a f-ck.

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October 30, 2013 at 6:30 am by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Chris Brown

1Chris Brown’s Felony Charge Reduced To Misdemeanor

Chris Brown

Chris Brown is getting a big gift. His latest asshat move was assaulting a man in D.C., and Brown got arrested and charged with felony assault. But it’s being reduced to a misdemeanor. Why? TMZ has the details:

Brown was arrested for felony assault early Sunday morning in Washington D.C. after allegedly attacking a man outside a hotel and breaking his nose.

Brown allegedly got into an argument with a man, said “I’m not down with that gay shit, I’m into boxing,” and then punched him in the nose. [Oh, so you're not for equality after all? How surprising.]


Sources tell TMZ … the reason the charges were reduced is because the injuries to the victim were minor, even though the victim told TMZ Brown broke his nose. Another reason — there were conflicting witness accounts of what happened.

And there’s even more great news for Brown and co.:

… Chris pled not guilty. Chris has just been released without bail. He’s also required to stay 100 yards away from the victim.

Chris had been ordered to take a drug test, but the judge just vacated that order. It’s standard in such cases to order a drug test, but that has been cancelled.

The bodyguard’s charge was also reduced to a misdemeanor.

Great. Fantastic.

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October 28, 2013 at 5:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives
Filed Under: Chris Brown
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