Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Chris Brown

Chris Brown Hit A Woman — In A Minor Car Accident

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Chris Brown got into a minor accident today when he rear-ended a chick in a Mercedes, who I’m sure was thrilled to get out of her car to exchange insurance info and see Chris Brown. TMZ was all over it. Is it possible they may have caused the accident by hounding Chris Brown? Or perhaps it was the photography company x17 who quickly posted a video of Brown and the woman exchanging insurance info right after it happened? I don’t know, I don’t know if they were following him or if they got there after. But damn, they’re quick. From TMZ:

Chris Brown has yet another legal problem to deal with, after crashing his car in Burbank.

The accident happened an hour or so ago … The photog tells us Chris was driving his Range Rover with his GF du jour Karrueche Tran, when he rear-ended a Mercedes.

Chris parked in front of the Mercedes and then exchanged info with the Mercedes chick.  The photog says damage to her car was “medium” … as opposed to rare.

Ha ha.

Considering Chris Brown didn’t want to pay $10.00 for valet, I wish this woman good luck on ever getting money from Brown or Brown’s insurance company.

Some People Really Want Chris Brown Dead

chris brown

Chris Brown can’t seem to catch a break. People are always trying to hold him responsible for his violent, misogynistic actions and stifling his artistic creativity. Well, now it gets worse: some people actually want him dead and are calling in threats to his lawyer’s office. Is this actually happening? Is it a ploy for sympathy? Who can say, but take ‘er away, TMZ:

The Los Angeles Police Department is currently investigating death threats made against Chris Brown … TMZ has learned.

According to our sources, multiple threats were called in to the office of Brown’s attorney, Mark Geragos. We’re told the caller threatened Chris’ life … but it’s unclear what, if any, specific threats were made.

Our sources say Geragos took the threats very seriously and immediately reported them to the LAPD, giving them all the information he had on the calls.

We’re told Geragos filled out a report and the LAPD are currently investigating.

Something in the water ain’t clean here -  I just don’t think this happened at all. After all, Chris Brown didn’t JUST get this reprehensible last week. He’s been an insufferable waste of space for years, so it’d be a bit anti-climactic for someone to get all up in arms now. Is this because of the devil art on his walls? Eh, whatever.

Chris Brown’s ‘Devil Art’ Is Upsetting The Neighbors

chris brown

Why anyone would at all be surprised that Chris Brown is a total asshole who couldn’t care less about what anyone thinks or feels is beyond me, but let’s all get outraged together because he put some “devil art” graffiti on the outside wall of his Los Angeles house and refuses to get rid of it despite it ruining the neighbourhood vibe.

Here’s the deal: Brown has some terrible artwork on the outside wall his property, and its ugliness is not even the crime here. It’s illegal to have shit like that all over the place and he’s already been cited for “excessive signage” but he basically thinks everyone else needs to get over it and has refused to rectify the situation. Nevermind that he could put this shit INSIDE his property where no one else has to look at his garbage, but whatever. Just like everything else in his life, he bears no responsibility for what’s happening and instead has once again taken on the role of victim, claiming that he’s being harassed. Oh, f-ck off with this idiot, already.

chris brown graffiti

From The Los Angeles Times:

Neighbors claim the monsters are scaring neighborhood kids and ruining the hillside aesthetic of the area below Lake Hollywood.

“There are lots of babies, lots of children, and they’re literally frightened. It’s like devils on the wall — big scary eyes and big scary teeth, and just the whole vibe is not what we’re used to,” said Patti Negri, president of the Hollywood Dell Civic Assn.

Responding to complaints about the monster art, L.A. city code officials cited Brown for unpermitted and excessive signage and ordered him to remove the art within 30 days. He also faces fines that start at $376 but could rise significantly if he fails to comply.

Brown’s attorney, Mark Geragos, said the musician is not backing down. He says it’s the neighbors who are harassing Brown.

“I’m scared of neighborhood busybodies like this,” Geragos said. “They’ve called animal control. They have sicced parking [enforcement] on him, and now they reached the heights of ridiculousness here. Shame on them.”

All right, listen. I want us all to take a deep breath here because I’m going to say something unexpected: I kind of understand where they’re coming from with this. In a sense, it his his property and it’s not like he’s got Nazi signs or murals of beaten women out there (surprisingly), but I also feel like he’s refusing to negotiate at all here just to be a dickhead because that’s seemingly his M.O. in life. Still, something tells me there’s a little something more than these neighbourhood kids just being “scared” (because if your kid is scared of that, there may be some other issues), but who can say?