Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Chris Brown

Karrueche Is Ready to Fight for Chris Brown

A photo of Karrueche Tran

Yeah, you get what’s yours, girl. Bring your man back home. Don’t even worry about all those photos and reports of him and Rihanna loving it up again, that’s totally whatever. What matters is that you’re focused, you’ve got a good head on your shoulders, and you’re prepared to really go for gold.

From TMZ:

Chris Brown’s recently-dumped ex Karrueche Tran still believes she has a future with the singer — in fact, Karrueche is telling friends, she’s not gonna stop trying to get with CB just because Rihanna’s back in the picture.

Sources close to Karrueche tell TMZ, she was hurt when Brown gave her the axe a few weeks ago … but she never stopped loving him — and now, she is on a mission to get him back.

We’re told Karrueche got used to a certain level of celebrity while dating the singer, and she’s not ready to “go back to being basic” — even if that means messing around with Brown, while he’s messing with RiRi.

Eventually, we’re told Karrueche hopes to edge Rihanna back out of the picture.

Case in point — Karrueche and CB were spotted hanging out together Monday in Burbank, CA … two days after Rihanna and CB were spotted together in L.A.

I don’t know if I’m a particularly independent woman or if I just don’t have these particular psychological issues (probably that one), but no. Even if there wasn’t the whole thing about location or fame or me being wary of dating a dude who is famous for beating up his girlfriend, if a guy broke up with me for another lady, boom, done. Never again. Like, you made your bed, bro, now lie in it and hopefully get some kind of curable but definitely troublesome STD.

All these girls just need to get of Chris Brown’s dick. There, I said it. Rihanna, Karrueche, whatever random girls he’s slept with while dating either of them, and all the fan girls who claim to be cool with him punching their faces. Get. Off. His. Dick. God.

Surprise, Chris Brown Is Still A Bad Person!

A photo of Chris Brown

He also got this big ol’ lion tattooed right on his throat last week, right next to his creepy lady tattoo. He tweeted that picture, along with the caption “symbol of Christ and Freedom!” Theory: in his mind, Chris is Jesus and Rihanna is a beaten face. Valid?

Oh, but that thing about Chris being a bad person still. Yeah, that’s true. We can tell because a few days ago he called one of his fans a f-ggot.

From Radar:

On Friday night Los Angeles resident Lucas Peter was at the Arclight movie theater in Hollywood when he spotted Chris and his entourage and approached him to ask for an autograph — but Lucas was taken off guard by Chris’ reaction.

“The movie let out and I saw Chris come out the front door, sort of semi-running. I approached Chris and asked him to sign my CD cover,” Lucas told RadarOnline.com in an exclusive interview.

“His bodyguard stopped me and said Chris wouldn’t be signing, so I told him Rihanna signs all the time. That’s when Chris stopped in the garage by the parking pay stand and yelled ‘f-ggot’ at me.”

Lucas, who is an openly gay man, admits getting angry at Chris’ ignorance and attacking him back by calling him a “wife beater.”

“I walked over to where Chris was getting in the elevator and called him a wife beater and asked him if he was going to beat Rihanna again,” Lucas said. “Chris said, ‘I beat p-ssy’ and then his bodyguard tried to scare me by saying, ‘And I beat men.’”

According to Lucas, Chris took off with his bodyguard — and one less fan.

You know, I can understand how celebrities could get a little irritated with all the attention and paparazzi and all, but if one single dude wants an autograph, would it really kill you to just give it to him? You just have to say “hey” and scribble on some paper, that’s it, and in doing that, you’ll have made someone’s whole night. Would that really be so taxing?

As for the rest, the name-calling and the “I beat p-ssy” comment, that’s just classic Chris Brown. It’s not disappointing on that level, because it’s just so expected, but it’s disappointing on a bigger level, like on a “oh, great, this is the way the world is sometimes” level.

Chris doesn’t even deserve to have that majestic lion on his throat.

Rihanna’s Dad Wants Rihanna to Marry Chris Brown

photo of rihanna and chris brown pictures
No, really. I know this is probably pretty surprising, considering the fact that Rihanna’s dad came out last week saying that he loves Chris Brown, but honestly, guys, he wants his daughter to marry the dude that beat the piss out of her that one time three years ago. And this is what he said:

“The family loved Chris Brown before they even met him. I always thought he was extremely talented. He always gave me great respect. Whatever makes her happy. I hope one day she will get married. Everyone adores Chris; he’s a super guy.”

I could seriously, seriously vomit. Is this, like, the Barbadian version of Michael Lohan, or what? This botard, publicly fellating Chris Brown and his TALENT and all of his SUPER-NESS and everything else … it positively reeks of a publicity dick-move. It’s like this guy wants nothing more than Rihanna to marry into (more) fame, and it doesn’t even matter what has to happen in order for this to … well, to happen. And that’s sad, guys. Pathetic.

Now Rihanna Is Getting Breast Implants for Chris Brown

A photo of Rihanna

Man, being Chris Brown‘s girlfriend seems like way, way too much work. I mean, there’s the obvious drawback, but then there’s the cheating, the lying, the mental abuse, and the general douchebaggery. Is his penis worth it? No, really, we’ve all seen it by now: is it worth it?

Apparently he’s got something going for him* though, because we can go ahead and add surgery and body image issues to the list of things that come along with being Chris Brown’s girl. We can do that because there are new reports that poor Rihanna, who has a killer body, is considering getting breast implants because Chris thought it would be a good idea.

From the Enquirer via Celebitchy:

Rihanna wants to boost her bust – because, according to a source, Chris Brown said she’d be “totally hot” with bigger boob! Rihanna is not out shopping for a plastic surgeon who will pump her up “at least one bra size,” a friend of Rihanna’s tells the Enquirer.

“It’s horrifying seeing how much control Chris still has over her,” said the friend. “It’s like she’s hypnotized.”

Friends are concerned that Rihanna’s fixation with Chris has now spiraled out of control. Although she has publicly joked in the past about having “no boobs,” she never seriously considered going under knife – until now.

“Rihanna’s always been insecure about her cleavage,” revealed the friend, “but Chris’s comment has spurred her on to really do something about it. Rihanna can’t help herself. What she really wants is something she can’t have – a committed relationship with Chris.”

A “friend” of Rihanna’s also said that if she and Chris eloped, “no one close to them would be a bit shocked.”  Oh, and also “she would have never left him if the media scrutiny didn’t get so bad.”

Great ideas!  Great ideas all around!  Let’s just close up shop here, friends, because there are no better ideas to be had in all the world. Somebody better travel to some far off land to check and see if they have any better ideas, because we’ve obviously topped ourselves on this planet.

*Manipulation. It’s manipulation.

Chris Brown Will “Try to Be Faithful” to Rihanna

A photo of Chris Brown and Rihanna

What a charmer, huh? Chris Brown will try to be faithful to you, and he probably won’t even beat you too much maybe! No promises though. You can’t tie down a man like Chris Brown.

From Hollywood Life:

Chris Brown is telling friends that he will “TRY to be faithful” to Rihanna, his now on-again girlfriend, since the R&B star split with girlfriend, Karrueche Tran, on October 4.

“He will try to be faithful to Ri, as faithful as he can to her,” a source exclusively reveals to HollywoodLife.com “He ain’t trying to hurt her feelings. He ain’t trying to get her all twisted up.”

Earlier this month, Chris and Rihanna had a week long NYC rendezvous while Karrueche was in also in town.  And, while the rapper technically cheated on Karrueche, his friends say that won’t be the case with the Rihanna.

“He will do his best. I mean, he’s a man at heart and it’s hard for him to turn down women when they come to him so freely,” our source reveals.  “But he did drop KT for Ri and told Ri he loves her so what that tell you? He know she right for him.”

As HollywoodLife.com previously reported, now that Chris has officially broken up with Karrueche, he has more than enough time to talk to Rihanna, and he’s making her his number one priority.

“Ri and Chris talk every day,” a source exclusively reveals to HollywoodLife.com “She be missing him like crazy [but] now that they back together she want to see him all the time. Guess those years away made her miss him real tough.”

F-ck Chris Brown and f-ck this guy, too. If Chris really was “a man at heart,” he would never have done half the shit he’s done. Chris Brown’s buddy is implying that Chris is a mature, respectable adult, and I think we all know how absurd that idea is. He’ll “try to be faithful,” f-ck you.

Sorry for all the cusses, friends, but this whole thing is just so off-putting to me. And probably to everyone. Everyone except Rihanna.

Rihanna’s Dad Is Still in Love with Chris Brown, Too

A photo of Ronald Fenty and Rihanna

Rihanna‘s dad is a dick. There, I said it. He’s a big, gross, stinky ol’ dick. He’s always said that Chris Brown should get back with his daughter because “he’s a nice guy,” but also because he used to beat Rihanna’s mom, so he’s totally cool with Chris.

But see, now that Chris has officially broken up with his official girlfriend, Karreuche, that means, of course, that it’s the perfect time for him to get back with Rihanna. And far be it from Rihanna’s dad to discourage that reunion:

Rihanna’s father has “no problem” with her getting back with Chris Brown.

The 24-year-old singer’s dad Ronald Fenty approves of his daughter’s reconciliation with her ex-boyfriend – who was arrested for violently assaulting her in 2009 – and thinks the pair will make each other happy now Chris has split from model Karreuche Tran.

He told In Touch Weekly magazine: “I know they love each other. They always have. She’s happiest when she’s around him, and as long as she’s happy, I am happy and the whole world should be too.”

Rihanna’s dad has given the couple his blessing despite Chris’ past mistakes and insists the star deserves a second chance because he is a respectful and charismatic person that he has a lot of “love” for.

Ronald enthused: “I think everyone makes mistakes and they shouldn’t be held to them forever. Everyone should be forgiven once. There’s a lot more to Chris than the whole world knows. I love Chris, man. He’s got so much charisma. And he’s always had so much respect for me. That’s what I love about him. He’s always shown me respect.”

The superstar’s father also praised Chris’ many talents, gushing about his “super-talented” singing and dancing as well as his design skills.

This is just so disgusting to me. “It’s cool that you almost killed my daughter because you’ve always been ok to me, and also I like your dance moves,” that’s basically what Rihanna’s dad is saying here. And that’s awful.

Karrueche’s Pretty Mad at Chris Brown, I Guess

photo of karreuche tran pictures pretty pic
From TMZ:

Chris Brown’s recently axed ex-girlfriend has 3 words for him — shut your mouth … because she is PISSED C.B. made that highly-produced drunken video confession about loving two chicks.

Sources close to Karrueche Tran tell TMZ … she’s livid over the fact that Brown blasted their personal problems all over the internet with his ridiculous video — in which he confesses to loving Rihanna and Karrueche at the same time.

If Chris thought the video would soften the blow of breaking up with Karrueche … he was dead wrong. We’re told KT feels Brown should have kept his feelings private and she’s disappointed and hurt by his decision to broadcast their personal life.

As TMZ previously reported … Brown announced his split from Karrueche earlier this week by stating, “I love Karrueche very much but I don’t want to see her hurt over my friendship with Rihanna.”

So what I’ve got to ask, really, is why is this pretty little Karreuche girl surprised that Chris Brown is a big, flaming, violent bag of dicks? Why is she so baffled by the fact that Chris would pretty much dump her ass through a public medium, and, to add insult to injury, release a f-cking video (a drunk video, nonetheless) detailing his love for two women, when throughout Chris and Karreuche’s entire relationship, it was probably claimed that there was no love left for Rihanna?

What a bogus deal this poor, dumb girl ended up with, huh? Though, I have to say, it’s totally better off for her in the long run. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: the smaller they are, the easier they break.

Here’s that stupid video in case you missed it the first time around: