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Cheryl Cole

Hell Yes or God No: Cheryl Cole at ‘The X Factor’ Manchester Auditions

cheryl cole

Our lady of the giant ass tattoo, Cheryl Cole, marked her return to The X Factor (UK version, natch) on Monday by kicking off the show’s 2014 auditions in Manchester. She turned up in this white skirt and top duo with bright blue shoes, and I think she looks a hot mess, which is a shame since she’s generally just plain old hot. Not feeling anything about this look and I have no idea who put it together… but what do you think?

Cheryl Cole's 'X Factor' Manchester look?
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Chery Cole’s new single, ‘Crazy Stupid Love’, is reppin’ the sax

crazy stupid love

If you’re English, you’ll know Cheryl Cole as a household name. If you’re not, you might remember her from the two or three episodes of the US version of The X Factor which she appeared in before getting the sack for being too Geordie. Or maybe it’s her giant ass tattoo that’s imprinted on your mind? Either way, she’s a “singer” first and foremost (I say that with love!) and after taking a little over a year off to party and travel, she’s back with a new single just in time for summer. It’s called ‘Crazy Stupid Love’ and I actually think it’ll be one of the biggest songs of the summer – at least over here in the UK.

What do we think? The sax really is making a comeback, eh?

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Cheryl Cole Dancing to Beyoncé Makes Me Really Uncomfortable, For Some Reason

cheryl cole beyonce

I’m not sure what went wrong here, really. I love Cheryl Cole, generally. She’s a fantastic dancer – like, freakishly good – but you’d never be able to tell from this video, which she filmed while on vacation over the holidays. It seems like something a teenage girl would rope her two friends from high school into doing to put on YouTube. Like, it’s so bad that I almost didn’t believe it was Cheryl at first.

Alas, Cheryl was feeling inspired by Beyoncé‘s female power anthem ‘***Flawless’ and so she put together this little video, which Bey herself apparently liked since she gave her a little shout out on Facebook for it.

What do you think? I mean, I know there has certainly been much, much worse out there, but when she’s capable of something like this:

Hoooo boy. See the difference? I wish she’d get back to making music, though, I have to say. All this vacation time is making me wonder what the hell Cheryl Cole is doing with her life (though I think most Americans will be wondering who the hell Cheryl Cole even is).

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What Was The Biggest Event Of The Summer? VOTE!

MET GALA 2013 Though summer’s technically not over, I think it’s time to take a look back at everything that happened these summer months. There was a LOT. What do you think was the most shocking? The most WTF? The best fashion moment? Let’s vote!

Which birth was the bigger deal?
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Most Shocking?
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Biggest WTF?
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Best Celeb Fight?
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Best Fashion Moment?
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Lady Gaga is back. Are you excited?
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Who was more annoying this summer?
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In case you need a refresher, here are some links to these stories:   Read More

So, What Do We Think Of Cheryl Cole’s New Ass Tattoo?

cheryl cole

Cheryl Cole is one of the most gorgeous women in the world, according to every survey ever taken on the subject. However, she’s also a woman known for her fucking terrible taste in tattoos, and this time, she’s really outdone herself. In an effort to, I dunno, cover up her former tramp stamp and RUIN HER ENTIRE ASS, she’s gone and covered it in some rose monstrosity that I just don’t know what to think about. Chezza, why? What possessed you?

Here’t the artwork in all its glory. Her tattoo artist Nikko Hurtado, who must’ve been pinching himself over getting to touch Cheryl Cole’s ass for 8 hours – posted the photo on his Instagram page and Cheryl’s been fielding the very vocal fan comments ever since:

cheryl cole tattoo

I mean, what? As a lover of Cheryl and Geordie women as a whole, I will stand by the Angel of the North. However, I will also block this from my memory and hope she keeps that thing well away from public view moving forward.

Quotables: Cheryl Cole Defends Chris Brown Right After He’s Kicked Out of a Club for Violence

photo of cheryl cole and chris brown pictures

“I think it’s really kind of Rihanna [to forgive Brown]. She’s come out and publicly forgiven him, really. I think it’s about time we all [forgave Brown], if I’m completely honest, if you want my opinion. I think it’s time we all moved on. That guy is talented as hell.”

“Talented as hell.” Bitch, please. This is why we’re supposed to forget that he tried to make mincemeat out of Rihanna‘s face? Because he’s “talented as hell”? And before y’all go off on me, saying, “Sarah, my God, yes, it’s high time we up and forgave Chris Brown for being a blackout-violent douchebag who continually perpetuates the fact that he’s a blackout-violent douchebag,” read this, OK? Check this little factoid out from Page Six:

Chris Brown’s famous temper flared up again before the Billboard Music Awards when he angrily confronted a stranger over a group of girls in a top Vegas club. According to witnesses, Brown spent more than two hours Saturday night at Haze at Aria charming a group of young women and buying multiple bottles of Champagne.

But one witness said, “Brown got visibly upset when the girls moved on to the next table. Brown approached the guys in the group [at the next table] and started getting visibly agitated. Brown stood up, and looked like he was about to start a fight when club security stopped him.”

While Brown’s rep insisted the account was “not true,” our witness continued: “He got in the guy’s face and was cursing at him, and saying, ‘Are these girls with you or with me?’ The guy was stunned by it. Things were close to getting extremely ugly. Then Chris’ security and club security escorted him out.”

A Haze rep confirmed there was an incident involving Brown but declined to go into detail. The club rep said, “Haze has a zero tolerance policy for violence.”.

And it doesn’t stop there! I’m not going to go ahead and blame Chris for the pitiful fools that a lot of his fans happen to be, but birds of a feather and all that … But supermodel Chrissy Teigen took it to Twitter and alluded to the fact that Chris Brown had been lipsyncing on Sunday night’s Billboard Awards show, and his dedicated followers went apeshit.

From TMZ:

Teigen has been under fire ever since she tweeted about Brown’s performance Sunday night … “Why sing when you can dance?”

Team Breezy went insane … hammering Chrissy with horrible messages that read:

– “all you do is talk s**t, you need to be raped and murdered.”
– “killyoself bitch ur nothing but tall thatswhy you model. your nothing.”
– “ditzy dumb ass tramp your mother should’ve aborted you.”
– “i hope you are the next ‘celebrity’ to die”
– “you have the brain capacity of a turtle, just die.”

Chrissy posted a statement about the situation … saying, “Reallllly makes me sad that 99% of the most disturbing comments come from young girls. I’ll end it there but it make me sad.”

She added, “I have some screen caps. And I will do everything I can to make sure people know, internet or not, you CAN’T say this s**t.”

So, to sum it all up, the only people bigger dickbags than Chris Brown are probably the die-hard fans who’re rabidly out for blood. Get the f-ck over yourselves already, damn.

Cheryl Cole Obtains Court Order Against Everyone

Cheryl Cole on May 16

Yikes! Take a photo of Cheryl Cole, go to jail?

Cheryl Cole, from the British pop group Girls Aloud, managed to get a court injunction forbidding everybody from photographing her anywhere near her London home.

The court order itself, which lasts through 2011, is particularly foreboding: “Any person who knows of this order and disobeys this order will be in contempt of court and face imprisonment, fined and have their assets seized.” Hooooohhh-kay.

It is pretty nuts to have your fans arrested, even if some of them are annoying shutterbugs. Then again, Cheryl Cole’s yen for Private Time is understandable—she’s seriously had the worst summer.

The story so far: Cheryl Cole was tapped to be a judge on the U.S. version of Simon Cowell‘s X Factor. To prepare for her new role, she moved to LA, lost a ton of weight, and tried to tame her thick ‘Geordie’ accent. Then, just two months after the initial announcement, Cole was abruptly fired for reasons yet unknown. Worse, she was replaced by snippy little Nicole Scherzinger. (The whole debacle is especially humiliating because Simon Cowell can’t seem to shut up.)

Now some people are saying Cole is so embarrassed, she’s retiring from showbiz completely. Regardless, it’s probably difficult to lay low once you’ve papered your own home and neighborhood with threatening flyers. Total kooksville.

This is neither here nor there, but last year Cheryl Cole caught malaria. Yep. Malaria, and then everything else happened. I’d go nuts, too.