Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Charlize Theron

If You’re Having a Low Self-Esteem Day, Don’t Even Bother With These Photos of Charlize Theron in French ‘Elle’

Charlize Theron is the worst. I mean, who can run around with a face and a body like that and then still kick-ass in a movie where she plays a completely horrible looking serial killer? (BTW, that clip is totally NSFW.) She’s either an alien or easily one of the most desirable human beings on the planet. For the sake of my mental health, I’m going to go with the former. Welcome to Earth, Charlize. You look gorgeous in the July 2010 issue of French Elle. Like, it’s almost unfair.

Brandon Flowers’ New Music Video, And Also Charlize Theron

All right, it came out last week, but if you’ve already seen it, just hush up and watch it again because it’s beautiful.

This song is the first glimpse of Brandon Flowers’ solo efforts (he’s also the lead singer of The Killers, just in case you don’t listen to music that is always catchy and sometimes good), and I think he’s doing pretty well all by himself.  I mean, hey, he got Charlize Theron to be in his music video, and I don’t think that’s anything to shake a stick at.

Also, I love this video.  Charlize Theron being a strong, dedicated heroine who saves poor, hapless Brandon Flowers from all of his unfortunate run-ins with ninjas – what’s not to love?  I also think the ending is lovely, but then again I’ve always been a sucker for tales of damsels in distress with happy endings, and Brandon Flowers makes for a really attractive damsel.  Who knew?

Are Keanu Reeves and Charlize Theron Hooking Up?

If so, God … this could be the best thing that’s ever happened to Reeves‘ career! You go, boy!

The folks at TMZ caught quite a lip-lock gropefest that occurred between the two after dinner together last night in Beverly Hills. I just can’t imagine this not being real, especially if someone like the A-listed Theron was willing to appear groping and nuzzling the likes of Keanu Reeves in public while rocking back and forth like tenth-grade sweethearts. In Beverly Hills, of all places.

If y’all want to lead such private lives, you better keep it in your pants in public, man. Those TMZ bastards are fucking everywhere.

Vid courtesy of TMZ

The Oscars – The Dresses (Part I)

During the red carpet foolishness known as ABC’s pre-Oscars warm-up show, one of the actresses — I think it was Meryl Streep- said that she loves coming to the Oscars because she gets to see all her friends dressed up. I have to agree. I giggle a little bit every time I see Jeff Bridges in a tuxedo because it’s like seeing my stoner hippie father at a wedding.

It was a classy affair at the Oscars tonight. Charlize Theron,  Kate Winslet, and Cameron Diaz were particularly stunning (as usual) and Sandra Bullock, who has a habit of being hit or miss, was gorgeous. There weren’t many terrible dresses, just some that were underwhelming– such as Rachel McAdams’ Ellie Saab gown that kind of  looks like a bedspread from a budget motel – pastel, with a pattern designed to camouflage old cum stains.

Also in this gallery: Kristen Stewart, Sigourney Weaver, Meryl Streep, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Gabourey Sidibe, and Carey Mulligan.

Just Because It’s Charlize Theron

I’m convinced that the folks over at Funny or Die must get the corporate rate on medical marijuana.  What other possible tactic might they employ to get some of the biggest stars to participate in their oftentimes not hysterical skits?  Zach Galifianakis — no, that’s not Joaquin Phoenix — appears in another episode of the fictional show Between Two Ferns with Charlize Theron as his guest.

Charlize Theron’s Boyfriend Doesn’t Appreciate Ass Smacking


I love hearing about celebrities’ less-than-stellar moments, especially when they look like Charlize Theron.  Because if you look like Charlize Theron, I need to know that some part of your life is crap.  Apparently, Friday night was crap night for the actress.

“She leaned over the table and smacked some other guys ass,” an eyewitness tells us.

“Stuart looked pissed, and looked at her and said ‘Why did you do that?’”

Clearly she didn’t have a satisfactory answer, as our onlooker tells us the couple bickered all evening before heading out.

“They constantly fought the rest of the night together, and ended up leaving the party early in a big huff,” said the spy.

You know, I think her boyfriend better get over it.  I mean, he’s truly the luckiest man in the world to have hitched to her star for this long, so if she wants to smack some dude’s ass, he needs to just accept that.  I wonder when the TMZ video of all this will surface?



“I don’t like living in an elitist world, it bothers me. I don’t want to be part of an elitist sexual preference. It bothers me.  Maybe it’s because I come from a country where I lived under apartheid.  This is a form of apartheid and I don’t want to be a part of that.”

Charlize Theron in an MSN interview comparing the ban on same-sex marriages to apartheid.  She has also gone completely Brangelina and vowed not to marry long-time partner Stuart Townsend until gay marriage is legal in every state.