Christ almighty, what is it with Charlie Sheen‘s obsession with Lindsay Lohan? He’s been throwing cash her way for months now to help with unpaid taxes, shredded dresses and the like… and now he wants to mentor her. I just can’t.
Charlie tells TMZ, “I have a kinship with somebody [Lindsay] who clearly needs a mentor, whether she wants one or not. She can continue to hang out with her dress shredding club buddies, or turn to me for some advice from a guy who’s been down the road as well as every other side trail on the journey.”
He adds, “If she listens, she’ll win. If she doesn’t, that’s on her.”
Let’s get this straight. This crack-addicted womanizer who thinks “WINNING!” is a good catchphrase is going to teach another crackhead how to… what, smoke more crack? Talk completely bonkers nonsense in interviews so that people wonder if she’s gone off the deep end for good? I think she’s got that one covered, bro.
The blind should never lead the blind, people. What’s so difficult to understand? Also, she’s half his age and clearly not in her right mind – what’s his interest in her? If he truly believes he’s in a position to save anyone else, then he really has lost the plot and should be institutionalized… maybe in a cell right next to hers?
March 4, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer
Okay, this whole Lindsay Lohan/Charlie Sheen thing is getting a bit out of hand, don’t you think? First he gives her $100,000 to pay off some back taxes, then he buys her a gala dress (which she cut to shreds, of course) and now she’s going to play herself in an upcoming episode of Sheen’s FX series, Anger Management. She’ll apparently be romancing his character in the show after becoming his therapy patient. Sounds nauseating.
In any case, the role is coming just in time, because no sooner did Lindsay pay off that $100k than she was hit with a whole new bill for unpaid taxes, this time to the tune of $56,717.90 for the year of 2011 (via TMZ). There’s also some talk about $140,203.30 being owed for 2010, but who even knows anymore. She’s broke, she’s desperate and she’s hanging out with Charlie Sheen. I think we’re done here.
February 26, 2013 at 7:30 am by Jennifer
Lindsay Lohan and Charlie Sheen may as well poke string through two empty soup cans like Molly of the American Girls series, because they are apparently best friends forever. Or someting else. Either way, Mr. Sheen (not Martin obviously), is helping Lohan pay her debts AND paid for the gown she wore to the amFAR (The Foundation for AIDS Resarch) event. Really? It cost that much? Lohan’s dress looked like the ones you could get at a vintage store on Ventura boulevard in Sherman Oaks. WHICH IS FINE. Just baffling that she asked someone to go halfies on it, let alone Charlie Sheen. Has homegirl not heard of Rent the Runway?
Sheen apparently offered to help Lohan with her insane debts, to the sum of 200k+ and Lohan reportedly refused. And is allegedly doing other things to cover that debt. Out of all of the men you’re going to refuse, is Charlie Sheen really going to be one of them? I’m not sure whether to be proud or disappointed. Charlie Sheen is the jerk of all jerks, but for whatever reason he wants to help you, and you’re turning that down in favor of letting your mom “help” you and whatever men you’re “dating”?
WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO FOR YOU OR CARE ABOUT FOR YOU? I’m out. I’ve checked out. When you hit rock bottom and you refuse help from CHARLIE EFFING SHEEN who has hit the rockiest of bottoms and yet for whatever reason has gotten another chance, it’s time to soldier up and GET A JOB.
February 13, 2013 at 5:30 am by Catherine St. Ives
I don’t know what’s gotten into Charlie Sheen lately – maybe the kind of syphilis that eats your brain? – but he’s been doing some awfully nice stuff lately. Last month, he gave a lot of money to the family of a little girl who’s currently fighting cancer, and this month, he gave a lot of money to another family. You want to know who?
That photographer that died trying to take a picture of Justin Bieber, right? His family is having a tough time raising enough funds for his funeral, because, you know, funerals are stupid expensive. One of the photographer’s friends is also friends with Charlie Sheen, and so Charlie heard that the family was struggling with this. So he wrote them a check for $12,000, and then when someone asked him about it, he gave this statement:
“A tragic incident like this erases the line between the photographer and the subject. It’s an unforgiving moment that begs us all to be human and work as one to prevent this in the future. As parents, we are all not supposed to bury our children. My deepest condolences to the families involved.”
Isn’t that nice? I think that is so nice. Charlie’s a f-cked up dude, but it’s good to know that even f-cked up dudes can take care of business every once in a while.
January 10, 2013 at 4:30 am by Emily
And not just f-ggot, guys, f-ggot assholes. Isn’t that so, so nice?
As the story goes, Charlie was hosting a music event at a club in Cabo, and before introducing the acts (which included Slash), he asked the crowd how they were doing. Apparently, they weren’t “doing” good enough for him, so he cried, “How we doing? … Lying bunch of f**got a**holes, how we doing?”
Charlie later talked to TMZ, who asked him about the slip. Charlie answered “I meant no ill will and intended to hurt no one and I apologize if I offended anyone”, and also, “I meant to say maggot but I have a lisp”, because yes, it’s totally funny to make fun of the credibility of your own apology by making fun of your own apology.
A leopard never really does change its spots, does it? All of that good-heartedness, giving Lindsay Lohan a hundred grand to pay off her tax debt … donating to help a little girl fight cancer … can Charlie’s use of the word “f-ggot” be overlooked because of his humanitarian deeds? I’ll be damned if I know.
December 30, 2012 at 1:00 pm by Sarah
Oh my god, no it doesn’t! Sorry for the foolin’, but it really, really doesn’t. It looks horrible, but then again it’s not like any of us expected anything great, right?
The most important thing about the trailer, obviously, is the scene between Lindsay Lohan and Charlie Sheen. As you can see, their scene was filmed as a sex tape (just think about that for a minute), and there is absolutely no kissing. If you look, you can see a little joke on the television about Lindsay’s probation being revoked, which is especially hilarious as it turned out to be true.
Luckily, TMZ got a hold of the script, and they know that Lindsay and Charlie’s dialogue includes gold like this:
LINDSAY: Okay but let’s do this quick, I got a court hearing in the morning … It’s a driving mishap thing.
CHARLIE: Promise me you won’t drive.
LINDSAY: That’s very sweet. You’re worried about me behind the wheel.
CHARLIE: I’m worried about me. I’m a pedestrian.
LOL. Also, when they start sexin’, Charlie “keeps running into LiLo’s numerous bodily devices … i.e. her sobriety monitor, tracking anklet, and a dog shock collar for orgasm help.” And one more tidbit: at some point, Lindsay runs Charlie over in her car, and then she hands off the keys to someone else because “you were driving.” Get it? It’s funny because that exact scenario happened in real life (besides the running over Charlie Sheen bit).
Are we all going to see this when it comes straight to DVD?