Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Caption This

Caption This – Last Week’s Winner and This Week’s Photo!

photo of katy perry pictures photos

It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests. Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!

We’ll be choosing the winner of this photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!

The winner on last week’s Amanda Seyfried photo: Brenda
“He told me it was just a rash and said it wasn’t contagious!!”

First runner-up: Jadam
“Wow this ‘at home self-gynecological kit’ sure is nice. It even comes with a fully illustrated book to help me understand all my naughty bits using animal illustrations. Sure wish I had an elephant’s trunk instead.”

Second runner-up: TiStick
“Back in a jif with another story, kids … right after i drain the giraffe.”

Congrats to Brenda, and for the rest of you, get commenting if you want to win some free crap!

Caption This – Last Week’s Winner and This Week’s Photo!

photo of amanda seyfried making weird face pictures photos stuffed animals

It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests. Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!

We’ll be choosing the winner of this photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!

The winner on last week’s Heidi Klum photo: Diana
“And I was backing up, backing up, backing up … my daddy taught me good …”

First runner-up: Heather H.
“Looks like Heidi Klum found a way to hide unwanted bags under her eyes.”

Second runner-up: PK
“Does this ass make my bag look fat?”

Congrats to Diana, and for the rest of you, get commenting if you want to win some free crap!

Caption This – Last Week’s Winner and This Week’s Photo!

photo of model heidi klum with a bag purse on her head pictures photos

Alright, guys! It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests. Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!
We’ll be choosing the winner of this photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!

The winner on last week’s David Arquette photo: Stacey
“Perhaps I’m just sexually deprived, but I saw this picture and my first thought was “Shaft & Balls.”

Congrats to Stacey, and for the rest of you, get commenting if you want to win some free crap!

Caption This – Last Week’s Winners and This Week’s Photo

photo of david arquette at the scream 4 premiere pictures photos midgets

Alright, guys! Today is the first round of weekly winners for the Evil Beet Caption This contests. Check them out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!

To the rest, keep at it – I’ll be choosing the winner of this photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!

The week’s winner on last week’s Charlie Sheen photo: LegalEase
“No, seriously guys…I once had a herpes sore on my cock that was THIS BIG! Porn Star Goddesses = winning, duh.”

1st Runner-Up: Can’tBeatSheen
“We need to hack up the person responsible for this bad connection. Hack him up into pieces in front of his children. We need to cut off his face and wear it and go on a very tightly budgeted shopping spree in stores that don’t exist yet!”

2nd Runner-Up: Stacey
“COKE HEADS…LET’S TWEAK IN UNISON!”

Congratulations to the winner, and good luck to the rest!

Caption This – The Contests Begin Today!

photo of topless charlie sheen on tour pictures photos naked

Alright, guys!

Today is the official beginning of the Evil Beet Caption This Contests. You’ve all done awesome things in the practice runs, and we’re looking forward to sending you some free crap if you score well on these, going forward.

Rules: For consideration, your caption must appear in the comments section by Sunday, April 9th at 11:59 PM ET. You can enter as many times as you like, but be warned: if your first caption sucks, your second, third, and fourth probably will, too. The week’s winner will be announced on Tuesday, April 12th, along with the next round of ‘Caption This’ glory. The same rules will apply for the subsequent weeks thereafter. When commenting/entering, be sure to use your real email address in the email field, so that I can contact you directly to get your mailing address in order to send your prize. Only one winner per week will receive a prize.

Last week’s winner on the Kate Gosselin photo:

Winner: D. Ugh
“Hey, I found a place to carry my career.”

1st Runner-Up: LegalEase
“Parenting skills, check…marriage, check…dignity, check…self respect, check…what the hell am I forgetting? Oh yea, where the f*ck are those kids???!!”

2nd Runner-Up: ZAMIRA
“Sure hope the garbage men don’t notice eight kids mixed in with the garbage…”

Alright, so let ‘er rip on the Charlie Sheen picture! And good luck!

Caption This

photo of kate gosselin taking out the trash garbage pictures

Don’t forget, starting officially on April 1st, we’ll have weekly ‘Caption This’ contests that result in real, live prizes. Pull out your funniest and stick ‘em in the comments if you’re interested in some cool shit.
This past week’s winner on The Situation photo:

Winner: y_punk_chew_ate
“He’s climbin in your windows/He’s snatchin your people up/Tryna rape em so y’all need to/Hide your kids, Hide your wife.”

1st Runner-Up: Chaz
“Feeling peckish, Snookie sends The Situation out for a late night snack.”

2nd Runner-Up: Heather
“Yo, she’s legal, I swear! And she’s totally DTF!”

Caption This

photo of the situation holding a baby pictures

Don’t forget, starting officially on April 1st, we’ll have weekly ‘Caption This’ contests that result in real, live prizes. Pull out your funniest and stick ‘em in the comments if you’re interested in some cool shit.

This past week’s winner on the Christina Aguilera photo:

Winner: Maxx
“C, I think you have a point. Sadly, she still looks like she has a family of worms living in the underside of her legs.”

1st Runner-Up: Anne
“Christina fought hard and won the role of playing Snookie in the new bio-epic of the cast of Jersey Shore.”

2nd Runner-Up: Alicia
“If I suck in reeeal hard, and push the rolls up to where boobs should be, and throw some stank on this look I’m givin’ … awww hell, Ke$ha took my girdle to the beach, yuins guys!”