Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Britney Spears

Together, Britney Spears and Nicki Minaj Can Do Anything

A photo of Nicki Minaj and Britney Spears

And I do mean anything, but on this particular occasion, I mean that together, Britney Spears and Nicki Minaj can start a small riot.

In case you haven’t heard, Nicki is joining Britney for her upcoming tour (who’s excited?!), and since the two ladies are getting somewhat tight nowadays, Britney decided to be a sweetheart and stop by a party Nicki hosted Friday night in L.A.  Of course, people couldn’t handle the combined magic of Nick and Brit, and here’s the result:

A source tells us, “[It] was complete pandemonium. Six people were carried out after hyperventilating. They literally fainted when Britney walked onto the stage where Nicki was hanging.”

For those still conscious, their goal was to try and reach Britney.

“People were crowd surfing to get to the stage. Screams were so loud for Nicki and Brit you couldn’t hear the music. Bouncers couldn’t hold the crowd back.”

I just can’t imagine fainting over Britney Spears in 2011, but hey, to each her own.  That being said, I’m fully prepared to admit the high potential for magic during a Nicki Minaj/Britney Spears tour.  What do you guys think?

I’ll Never Look At a Squatting Britney Spears The Same Way Again

We’ve talked quite a bit over here about how Britney now just isn’t the same as she used to be, but if you needed any more proof, check out this quote her choreographer, Brian Friedman, gave OK Magazine regarding how he gets BritBrit to remember her moves:

“I feel like a comedian all day when we’re working together. If you do a little squat down to the floor, I always scream, ‘take a poop!’ … I always use analogies with steps because if you remember, ‘take a poop, wipe it off’ then you remember doing a squat and then coming up and doing a hip roll with your hands on your hips.”

I get that all those moves might be difficult to remember for someone who’s fried her brain with prescription pills, but I actually want to vomit thinking about someone talking to me like that in a professional environment. I mean, what kind of moron is this choreographer if this is the best he can come up with?

Can we see if we can come up with something better in the comments than “take a poop, wipe if off?”

I can’t believe I just typed that. I need to go shower.

If You’re a Pessimist, You’ll Say That This is Why We’re ‘Losing’ the War on Terrorism

But if you’re just someone who likes to watch fun things and get a good chuck here and there like me, you’ll just find this whole thing pretty endearing. Gotta have fun somehow, right?

Above, you’ll see a cornucopia of soldiers getting their groove on to Britney‘s ‘Hold It Against Me,’ and honestly, the only thing that freaks me out about this video is the seductive way that the one ham-faced chick does a stand-up writhe and says something about me being her type. I ran from the computer with clenched fists, screaming ‘No, no, I’m NOT your type!’

I came back eventually, but damn. She really got to me for a minute there.

Director David O. Russell Begrudgingly Allows an Entire Interview to Be About His Love For Britney Spears

David O. Russell directed The Fighter, one of my favorite movies from last year, as well as I Heart Huckabees, so I wouldn’t exactly imagine him being the biggest Britney Spears fan. Something about dark movies with comedic undertones doesn’t exactly scream “huge pop music” fan to me, but hey, I’m all about the element of surprise.

Russell did an interview with Vulture after checking out a film at the Tribeca Film Festival last night and it’s full of all kinds of sound bites I wasn’t expecting from a grown man. Apparently he’s a huge Britney Spears fan. Like, to the point where he almost hired her for Naomi WattsHuckabees role.

The interview:

You work with so many different people in movies. Who would you love to work with, no matter how far-fetched?
Woman with O. Russell: Oh, I think that’s easy.
Russell: Really? Then you answer the question.
Woman with O. Russell: Britney.
Russell: Oh yeah, Britney. Yeah.

Spears?
Yeah.

Why?
You’re getting me into so much trouble. Who am I talking to? New York Magazine? This is bad. I’d also love to work with Johnny Depp under any circumstances. I think Britney could be great in a lot of different things, and I’m a huge fan of hers. And I actually auditioned her for a couple things.

Really?
Yeah. [To woman.] So there, I gave him something he’s going to write about.

You really want to work with her?
Used in the right way, I think she could be … I’m a believer, I’m not a hater, which I realize more columns and articles are built on hating. You get more journalism out of hating than you do out of loving. But I’m a lover, not a hater. So her, Johnny Depp. Who else would I love to work with? Who’s, like, a musician that I’m always, like, I would die for? … Jack White. Oh, I also, I’m going to say Cher. [Laughing hard.] Read More

Britney’s New Music is Already Being Remixed

And it’s either the mark of a really great singer/songwriter/performer that everyone wants a piece of her genius, or the mark of a really awful singer/songwriter/performer that everyone thinks, ‘Fuck, I TOTALLY could have done a better job with this. Sit back and just watch.’

Anyhoo, here’s the Bollywood remix of Britney‘s ‘Dance ’til the World Ends.’ I actually like it much more than the original version. It’s still got the pretty gritty Britney sound, and it’s maintained much of its appeal, but I think the remix kills the original in this case.

What do you think?

Marry, Kill, F*ck: The Evil Beet Sweetheart Edition

A photo of Lindsay Lohan

You guys seemed to enjoy the last time we played “Marry, Kill, Fuck,” so I decided it’s high time for round two.  This time, the theme is “Evil Beet Sweethearts.”  You know, there are a few certain ladies that we especially love around here, and those are the ladies I want to focus on.  Like if we were putting together an Evil Beet calendar, you’d definitely expect to see that hot ass picture above for August of whatever, wouldn’t you?  Yeah, you keep that sexy image in mind while you check out your choices.

1. Lindsay Lohan.  Come on, you know you’d have a kick ass time with this girl.  She’d probably even get you some sweet jewelry – just don’t get all nosy about where she got it.  And on a purely superficial level, Lindsay’s very attractive, save the lip injections and meth.

2. Paris Hilton.  Now, I know what you’re thinking: we’ve presented the theory that Paris’ vagina is radioactive, why would we ask you if you want to have relations with her? Maybe because she’s a sexy minx with a heart of gold. You could pose for sexy Christmas cards together and she could serenade you with her beautiful voice whenever you wanted.  Just watch out for that pesky cocaine problem.

3. Britney Spears.  Pros: Britney’s been marginally less crazy lately, and if you were with her you might get a threesome with Ke$ha!  Cons:  you’d probably have to pretend like her new music doesn’t suck, and that would put a strain on any relationship.

There you have it.  Let me know your choices in the comments!

It Looks Like Brit-Brits’ Gonna Be a Bride Again

Britney Spears, Jason Trawick and her boys all went on a family-style vacation to The Grand Canyon and some Las Vegas dolphin pool this week and they’re starting to look like a proper family. Has someone finally tamed the wild beast?

I’m calling it: Britney’s third marriage could go down any minute now. She’s been with this Jason dude for awhile, her kids are comfortable with him and let’s face it: There’s pretty much no other way she can get out of that pesky conservatorship. Plus, she hasn’t publicly ruled out the idea of getting hitched again, and to me that seems like she’s probably considering the idea.

Do you think there’s going to be another Spears wedding? Share your thoughts in the comments and make sure to vote in the poll!

Are Britney and Jason going to get hitched?
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