Britney Spears has been looking pretty all right for the past couple of weeks, right? I mean, better than this, at least.  And do you know who you can thank for that turnaround?  You can thank her boyfriend, Jason Trawick, because he gave her an ultimatum:  she could either have her lack of personal hygiene or a boyfriend:

Brit’s man Jason Trawick has worked himself up into a lather and told the singer that she smells a little bit toxic and needs to shower more often – or she’s dumped.

Those close to her – although we’re guessing they’re not too close – say Britney refuses to wash her hair for days and often doesn’t change her clothes.

A smell-conscious friend told Heat: “Britney’s not the type to cover herself in pretty-smelling lotions. She hates washing her hair, so sometimes it can smell downright sour. She’ll sometimes grab an outfit and wear it two or three times a week. Recently she put on a sundress for the third day in a row, but Jason refused to leave the house with her until she put on something else.”

It sounds like Britney’s cleaned up her act since Jason mentioned her whiffy aroma, and has been changing more regularly. Friends have said the singer’s hygiene problem is down to laziness – and the fact that she’s so used to having an army of stylists dressing her that she can’t be bothered to do it herself.

“She was the same when she was with K-Fed,” said one friend.

“Thankfully, she’s trying more now because even she knows you couldn’t think of a more embarrassing reason for a relationship to break down.”

There’s been recent sightings of Britney wearing the same outfit twice in one week, and her hair really speaks for itself, so I’m going to go ahead and believe this story, or at least believe that there’s a grain of truth to it.  And while I think that’s so sad, it’s really just another chapter in the saga of Britney Spears and her zany ways.

Hurry up with that new album, Britney, so we can once again wipe your crazy slate clean and praise you for good-time music!

When Britney Spears was photographed enjoying a beverage from Starbucks yesterday and looking considerably less crazy than the last time that happened, there was some speculation that Ms. Spears had something coming up.  Then today, MTV made an announcement that makes me feel like Christmas is going to come a little bit early this year:

Britney Spears will be releasing a new album in just a “few weeks”, according to producer Rodney ‘Darkchild’ Jerkins.

Britney’s label Jive confirmed back in March that she had begun work on her follow-up to 2008′s Circus, and now Jerkins has told UStream: “Britney fans are gonna be so happy in a few weeks.”

The as-yet-untitled album will be Britney’s seventh, and is expected to include contributions from producers including Danja and Predator Dub Assassins.

We can’t wait!

Me neither, MTV.  I feel like this is going to be something special.  Yesterday, as I was shuffling through my music, “Lucky” came on.  I smiled, and remembered a time when Britney Spears had her shit together, or could at least pretend like she did to make fun music.  I thought of how much fun it would have been to be able to dance to an awesome Britney song at the gay bar (“Womanizer” does not count), and I mourned the fact that it probably just wasn’t in the cards. Then this announcement was made.  And even though she’s been looking kind of jacked for the last little bit, I’m going to go ahead and get my hopes up.

So Britney Spears has been out and about a lot lately with the most horrible hair.  While I just chalked it up to Britney being her good ol’ crazy, lovable self, there’s actually a little more to the story.  Don’t worry, it’s still because she’s crazy though.

Apparently the situation is that Britney constantly switches stylists.  According to E!, she’s been bouncing between stylists and salons for a while now, and here’s the reason:

“They don’t want anyone getting close to her,” a source tells E! News. “They won’t use anyone who has done her hair in the past and won’t let any current stylist see her more then three times.”

Does that sound really shady to anyone else?  Why can’t Britney get close to someone?  Are there secrets that no one knows about that could be divulged to a sympathetic stylist? Does Britney have attachment issues?  Has the real Britney died and the girl we are seeing stumbling around today is really a robot?

Please do your part in solving this mystery in the comments.

Oh, I am just so concerned. I am really concerned after seeing this photo. You guys, that’s the back of multimillionaire and international pop sensation Britney Spears’ head.

It’s looks like what happened to your Barbie dolls hair after you got them wet and tried to comb it out with a regular human brush. I know dogs who take care of themselves better than this. Why on earth does she insist walking around like she’s poor? Why? Is this more acting out or does she really not give a fuck about herself? Because I don’t see this as a “rebelling against Hollywood and the need to look perfect” sort of thing. If I saw this on a girl at the mall, I’d cross to the other side of courtyard because I’d assume she’s a meth head looking to pickpocket.

So give it your best shot, dear commenters. There’s so very much to say here.

Much like the “personality” tests and quizzes you took rampantly as a fifteen year-old, Britney’s fear of hard questions was assuaged in her very own multiple choice quiz during a recent interview with Cosmo, and some of the answers are sure to shock you (except for the coffee and ice cream one … you’ll see):

I’m dreading the moment when my sons ask me: how babies are made
If I had to wear one style of shoes for the rest of my life, I’d choose: flip-flops
Stage fright is something that: still bothers me
The one stage prop I wish I still had is: the flying pink SUV from my Do Somethin’ video
If a guy wants to make me laugh, all he has to do is: fall down
If my sons told me they wanted to be in the entertainment business, I’d: lock them in their rooms until they turned 30
The thought of turning 30 in a year and a half makes me: reflect on my life so far
I perform my best when: I’m amped
The TV show I’d most love to make a cameo on is: Gossip Girl.
Even though I’ve already accomplished so much, I’m driven to achieve more because: I genuinely love what I do and the company I keep is so much fun.
My preferred fashion style when I’m performing is: exciting, different and always stands out, but when I’m offstage, it’s: flattering yet comfortable
I feel most powerful when: I’m working out
I attribute my career’s longevity most to: hard work
Having people constantly taking my picture is: something I always knew would come with the job I chose
I’ve found that a great way to deal with nerves before a performance is to: move around
When I’m feeling down, I find that I’m always cheered up by: coffee & ice cream
The person whose opinion matters most to me is: my family
The song I sing to lull my boys to sleep is: always different
At this point in my life, what’s most important to me in a guy is: personality
The most difficult adjustment to motherhood I had to make was: teaching my boys potty training.
If an up-and-coming young performer asked me for advice, I’d tell her: life is short, have fun.
The most heroic (crossed out heroic and wrote horrific) thing I’ve ever done is: broken my knee.
The one thing about men and relationships I wish I’d known 10 years ago is: to say what you want. speak your mind!
I know it’s a little weird, but I think: it’s hard to cook
The best advice I ever got was: be yourself!

Girl must need some cheering up, like, without end. But damn, Britney. I love you. I have to agree on the “how a guy can make you laugh” thing — there’s nothing funnier than someone falling down, you know?

Yesterday afternoon, these photos were taken of Britney Spears outside of Starbucks, and although she did have a delicious beverage (that’s my frap of choice too, Britney!), this girl did not look any kind of happy.  In doing my part to help her out, I’ve devised a list of advice to help her not look so crazy.

1. I’m not entirely sure what could make a person’s hair do that, but when you’re having a bad hair day, just try a ponytail or a cute hat!  You’ll protect your clearly damaged hair while also protecting your face from the sun!
2. If you’re wearing a white shirt, it’s best to wear a nude-colored bra to match your porcelain skin, Brit.  That way, the focus won’t be on that patterned bra that looks suspiciously like mesh, but instead it will be on your pretty face!
3. There are only two kinds of people who should wear those socks:  costume party attendants and waitresses at themed restaurants.  I don’t think you are either of those, Britney, so get some hot summer sandals or a more functional pair of ankle socks, and save your calves from the sweltering heat!
4. When you go for a more racy look, it’s always a necessary step to make sure your panties aren’t visible. A simple fix would be going for an undergarment with less fabric, or you could be especially daring and just go commando! We all know you’re no stranger to that!

I hope these tips help, Britney!