Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt got punched in the face by a stranger

angelina jolie brad pitt

In what must be the 2014 equivalent of Fabio getting smacked in the face with that bird while riding a roller coaster, poor Brad Pitt was jumped by some random dude at the LA premiere of Angelina Jolie‘s Maleficent. Someone wanted to destroy his beautiful face at all costs! HOW COULD THEY?!

Basically, some guy named Vitalii Sediuk jumped the fence while Brad was on the red carpet and ran over to him and started swinging. He made contact with Brad’s face before police stepped in and arrested Sediuk and he’s being charged with misdemeanor battery. This isn’t new for him, either – Sediuk is the one who got slapped for trying to kiss Will Smith, got arrested for crashing the Grammys and most recently, assaulted America Ferrera.

Why exactly is this asshole given credentials for any of these events given his history?

Anyhow, here’s US Weekly‘s extra tidbit on the happenings:

An eye witness tells US when Pitt left the premiere, “he did seem a little tense” and was “trying to shepherd his kids through the lobby and towards the back door,” adding Pitt, “was like ‘Keep tight. Stay together.’”

People seriously need to cool their jets, and this Sediuk asshole needs to be banned… like, from everything.

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Angelina Jolie’s kids are planning her wedding to Brad Pitt

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Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have been teasing the world with the possibility of a big wedding for years, but so far, it seems we’ve all been waiting in vain. Not for long, though – Angelina says the couple’s kids are in charge of planning the whole affair, so it’ll end up being Disney or paintball. HOW ABOUT BOTH?

From People:

“We are discussing it with the children and how they imagine it might be,” Jolie, 38, who stars in the new film Maleficent, tells PEOPLE in this week’s cover story. “Which is verging on hysterical, how kids envision a wedding.”

“They will, in a way, be the wedding planners,” she says of Maddox, 12, Pax, 10, Zahara, 9, Shiloh, 7, and twins Knox and Vivienne, 5. “It’s going to be Disney or paintball – one or the other!”

That’s cute – and great that they’re getting the kids involved, though there are no surprises there given that really Brangelina are only getting married because the kids have been asking for it. Still, really cute – I kinda love them as a couple.

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Brad Pitt makes getting a parking ticket look good

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First of all, how in the hell is Brad Pitt 50? Between him and Jared Leto (ESPECIALLY Jared Leto), men seemingly just don’t age – at least not nearly as quickly/noticeably as us ladies.

Anyhoo, Brad visited the Fahey/Klein Gallery in Los Angeles on Friday and he’s shined himself up like a new penny – meaning he actually took a razor to his wilderness man facial hair and doesn’t look too much like a stoner.

There is a bit of hidden sadness to this day, though: Brad got a parking ticket when he got back to his car! :(

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