During the financial crisis of the past months, Warren Buffett has somehow managed to increase his net worth by $8B.

This officially makes him the richest American, after playing second fiddle to Bill Gates for 15 years. Gates lost $1.5B this month.

WTF was Buffett investing in? How does he know these things? I think Warren Buffett owns a time machine.

We should elect him!

Hey, you know that Microsoft commercial that they reportedly paid Jerry Seinfeld $10M to be in?

It’s about shoes.

And it’s stupid.

Like Microsoft.

I am LOVING my Mac, you guys. Soooo much better than my PCs with Windows. Like, head and shoulders above.

But, anyway, if you wanna hear Microsoft’s side of the story:

So what’s the deal? In an email we’ve obtained from Microsoft SVP Bill Veghte to all employees, he talks about the goals of the campaign. The overall goal is to inspire consumers and “tell the story of how Windows enables a billion people around the globe to do more with their lives today.” This first phase, he says, “is designed to engage consumers and spark a new conversation about Windows – a conversation that will evolve as the campaign progresses, but will always be marked by humor and humanity.”

The ads are just an icebreaker, he ads, to reintroduce Microsoft to consumers. Later this month they’ll do a deeper dive, which I assume means talking about features.

I still think Microsoft sucks (reminder: Vista crashed on me FOUR TIMES the first — and only! — night I used it) and I love my Mac.

If you’re wondering where Lindsay Lohan acquired her penchant for rambling, nonsensical epistolaries, look no further than her father’s most recent jailhouse opus. [Pop on the Pop]

Aw, Danny Tanner can still make his little girls smile. [Agent Bedhead]

Turns out Courtney Love can stay sober and plant absurd rumors about how she’s being considered as a judge for American Idol and categorically deny them, all at the same time! Yet, basic spelling continues to elude her. [Defamer]

Tara Conner’s no stranger to any type of blow. [ICYDK]

I hadn’t heard of Lily Allen until sometime last week, but this girl’s getting really famous really fast. [popbytes]

The gossip and sports blogospheres collide with the sound of Gisele Bundchen getting pummeled by Tom Brady. [The Big Lead]

Memo to Tyra Banks: We are done talking about the weight you’ve put on in the past couple of years. We did it for a day or two, got it out of our systems, and we’re ready to move on. We’d really appreciate it if you’d allow us to do that. Step away from the fat pictures, Tyra. Please. Love, The Blogosphere. [The Blemish]

Bill Gates can’t get away from Jon Stewart fast enough. [Cele|bitchy]