Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Angelina Jolie

Quotables: Brad Pitt is Getting Married. SOON.

photo of angelina jolie and brad pitt pictures

I am getting more pressure from my kids, and it is something I want to do within their lifetime, but I also feel like the time has come… The time is nigh. It’s soon. I got a good feeling about it.

Brad Pitt on finally anteing up and marrying his babies’ mama, Angelina Jolie. But the part about marrying within his childrens’ lifetime honestly kind of confuses me. I mean, even if he married Angelina Jolie on his f-cking deathbed, God willing, wouldn’t that be in his childrens’ lifetime? That’s kind of a broad arena if you ask me. He says the “time has come” and the “time is nigh”, which are one and the same, but do they both mean that it’s going to be soon-soon, or, like, when all of his kids are able to legally drink-soon?

Do we even care that Brad Pitt and Angelina are *finally* getting married? Are we over these guys as a couple, like we’re already over Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling (because about those last two people, I’m answering for you: YES. YES WE ARE.)?

Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie Have Obnoxious Kids

A photo of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie

From Us Weekly:

Brad Pitt knows where the wild things are — at his hometown pizza parlor.

Every time the actor, 48, and his six children visit Springfield, Missouri, a source tells Us Weekly, the brood goes bananas at Arris’ Pizza!

“The place shuts down for the entire night and the kids raise a ruckus,” says the insider of Maddox, 11, Pax, 8, Zahara, 7, Shiloh, 6, and twins Vivienne and Knox, 4. “They jump on tables and even throw food at each other!”

Pitt and Angelina Jolie, 37, leave their nannies at home and “let the kids enjoy themselves,” continues the source about the couple, who normally divide their time between properties in Los Angeles and their Miraval estate in France.

The twosome loosen up too — on policing their pack.

Says the insider, “Brad and Angelina just sit there and talk to one another while the children run around in circles!”

Uh, no. No way. It’s sweet that Brad and Angelina pay to close the restaurant for the night, but I still don’t think that makes this ok. This is obnoxious* as hell, and it’s just not cool. No kid needs to learn that it’s acceptable to go into a restaurant and throw food. Pull it together, Brangelina.

*Speaking of obnoxious, do you know what I did this weekend? I waited 30 minutes to buy three DVDs. I wasn’t even in line: I was at the register, listening to the cashier make the same lame joke 10 times and looking at his stupid hands because he got something on them and he had to go wash them just one more time, for literally 30 minutes. Obnoxious for days.

Are Brad And Angelina Getting Married This Weekend?

A photo of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt

Probably not, but it’s fun to think about anyway, isn’t it?

Here’s what’s happening: you know that house that Brad and Angelina have in France? There’s apparently been a lot of activity going on around there this week. See, they’re getting ready to have a big party, and lots of important people have already arrived to pregame, like the jeweler who made Angelina’s ring and Brad’s parents. George Clooney is coming, too, but he wanted to pregame at his place over in Italy.

So what’s the occasion? It’s the 50th anniversary of the original Mr. and Mrs. Pitt! That’s really sweet that Brad is throwing such a big party for them, right? Except now it starts to get a little less sweet, because everyone is stealing Brad’s parents’ thunder by saying that this party is actually a wedding. THE wedding. Ugh.

Look, maybe this really is it. Maybe Brad and Angelina are telling everyone that they’re having a big ol’ party for his parents, but really it’s a secret wedding. Maybe Brad and Angelina and Brad’s parents will have a double wedding/vow renewal. Maybe they already eloped and this is just a nice little celebration of that. I have no idea. But I just really, really don’t think that this is the weekend. And if it is, I don’t think we’ll hear about it for a good long while.

Brad and Angelina to Wed in New Orleans This Summer?

photo of brad pitt and angelina jolie pictures new orleans pic
From STV:

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are expected to make their wedding vows to one another in New Orleans, Louisiana, by the end of the year.

Reports surfaced earlier this week that the A-list movie stars were to say ‘I do’ in Britain, where they have been living in recent weeks.

The couple were said to be planning a low-key wedding in Windsor, before enjoying a honeymoon at their South of France home in Provence.

But according to heat magazine, Brangelina are actually gong to take the plunge in New Orleans, a city very close to their hearts.

The couple fell in love with the Louisiana city after visiting in the aftermath of the 2005 Hurricane Katrina devastation, with much of the money from Brad’s Make It Right foundation helping to rebuild the area.

And according to the mag, they are keen to hold their nuptials there as they think it will help bring even more cash into the city.

“People thought they would choose their house in France, but New Orleans makes much more sense,” a ‘friend’ is quoted saying.

“They don’t have a huge place in LA at the moment, but they have one in New Orleans. Also they know how much money will be injected into the city if they marry there.”

Apparently the couple have already made some key arrangements for their wedding, which is expected to take place this summer, including booking a florist and caterer.

Man, you know what would be just plain delightful? If Brad and Angelina tied the knot in New Orleans while I was there. I’m headed down for a four-day trip in a few weeks, and—ahem, publicists, managers, [fill in the blank]s, etc.—if they could happen to make the date sometime around September 29th, that would be, you know, pretty nice. I know I’d appreciate it.

Who Is The Highest Paid Actress in Hollywood?

A photo of Meryl Streep

Oh, you guys, I’m sorry. When I asked the question of “who is the highest paid actress in Hollywood?” and then put a picture of Meryl Streep right up there at the top, that made it look like Meryl is the highest paid actress, didn’t it? I’m sorry, but it’s just not true. Meryl is on the list, but she’s not at the top. She deserves to be at the top, but she’s not.

Before I let you know the richiest rich lady in Hollywood, let me just show you the top ten list, all right? I’ll go ahead and tack on the amount of money they made in the past year, just so you can cry while you balance your checkbook like I do.

10. Jennifer Aniston – $11 million
9. Kristen Wiig – $12 million
8. Meryl Streep – $12 million
7. Sarah Jessica Parker – $15 million
6. Julia Roberts – $16 million
5. Charlize Theron – $18 million
4. Angelina Jolie – $20 million
3. Sandra Bullock – $25 million
2. Cameron Diaz – $34 million

Ok, but who do you think landed in the number one spot? Who do you think made nearly three times as much as the beloved Meryl Streep? Who do you think made a few million dollars more than Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Aniston combined?

A photo of Kristen Stewart

1. Kristen Stewart – $34.5 million

Yes, thanks to them Twilight movies and Snow White and the Huntsman, Kristen Stewart is the top-earning actress in all of Hollywood. Does anyone else feel physically ill?

EXCLUSIVE PHOTO: Angelina Jolie as Maleficent

photo of angelina jolie maleficent pics
Yay! It’s the first photo of Angelina as the evil Maleficent! Could it be cooler? No. I don’t think it could.

In a recent interview with Entertainment Weekly, Angelina talks about the role and claims that her kids love the horns (because really. Who wouldn’t?:

What’s next for you as an actor?
The next thing I’m doing is Maleficent for Disney. I start it in June, and it’s a really great script. I’m having a lot of fun. I’ve already got my horns fitted. My kids are very happy.

In this version, Sleeping Beauty is the nemesis instead of the good guy?
It’s not anti-princess, but it’s the first time they’re looking at this epic woman.

Is it sympathetic to her, or is she a straight-up villain?
It’s both. I hope in the end you see a woman who is capable of being many things, and just because she protects herself and is aggressive, it doesn’t mean she can’t have other [warmer] qualities. You have to figure out the puzzle of what she is.

So there are some redeeming qualities to Maleficent the witch?
It sounds really crazy to say that there will be something that’s good for young girls in this, because it sounds like you’re saying they should be a villain. [Maleficent] is actually a great person. But she’s not perfect. She’s far from perfect.

There’s a tradition of taking a classic character who is a villain and telling the story from his or her perspective. John Gardner did it with the 1971 novel Grendel, and more recently we got the witch’s story in Gregory Maguire’s Wicked, and the musical it inspired. We like it when the bad guy is deeper than we thought.

In general, it’s a very good message to say, “Let’s look at something from the other side.” But then also, what our challenge will be — and the script writer [The Lion King and Alice in Wonderland’s Linda Woolverton] has already cracked it — is not to simplify it, not to just reverse the story but tell a bigger story that doesn’t point the finger [at Princess Aurora] either. It doesn’t flip it.

Since it’s a Disney film, will this version of Maleficent be close to the one we know from their 1959 animated film?

We’re still figuring out the look. We’re experimenting with different things. But the horns are the horns — you can’t deny them. You have to have horns.

Personally, I don’t think there could have been a better casting in this case. Honestly, half of the population (namely those strange Team Jennifer Aniston folks) already thinks she’s a horned witch, her super-power being able to lure men away from “decent” women with their exposed zombie legs, but I think it was a good choice. There’s no doubt that Angelina’s a talented lady, and she sure physically fits the part, too.

What do you guys think of Angelina in the role of Maleficent?

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Is Angelina Jolie Directing The 50 Shades of Grey Movie?

A photo of Angelina Jolie

First of all, HAHAHAHAHA. But second of all, this is actually a real rumor that is really going around.

From The Hollywood Reporter:

A fun rumor went around Hollywood this past weekend: Angelina Jolie, people were saying, had been approached to direct the movie version of the steamy romance novel Fifty Shades of Grey.

THR checked out the chatter last weekend and sources said there may have been an informal conversation but that nothing was real, and reps for the actress-turned-filmmaker say there haven’t been any talks with studio Focus Features (Focus also denied the rumor). Still, bloggers are now starting to catch wind of the rumor and of course, in Hollywood, there’s always the possibility that Jolie will come aboard.

It would make some sense. Jolie, who made her directorial debut in 2011 with the well-reviewed war drama In the Land of Blood and Honey, and Focus is likely looking for a strong female voice to pair with the material. Regardless, Focus and sister company Universal Pictures are still trying to find the right filmmaker to pair with the racy, somewhat controversial book by EL James. Those efforts are ongoing.

Shades has become a publishing phenomenon, recently hitting10 million in sales. Universal and Focus paid $5 million for movie rights in a bidding war earlier this year.

At the same time, casting rumors have circulated online, with everyone from Amanda Seyfried to Kristen Stewart being floated as possible actresses to play Anastasia Steele, the young woman who becomes involved in an explicit relationship with billionaire businessman Christian Grey.

No, this doesn’t make any sense. Angelina Jolie‘s directing credits include A Place in Time, a documentary that, according to Wikipedia, “captures daily life in 27 locations around the world during a single week,” and In the Land of Blood and Honey, the drama set during the Bosnian War, a movie she also wrote. That’s it. In what world would she go from that to 50 Shades of Grey, a movie based on a poorly written Twilight fan fiction?

Sadly, this is one of those rumors that I’m going to go ahead and dismiss, but man, wouldn’t it be so great if it was true?