Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Anderson Cooper

Anderson Cooper Hates Chris Brown Too!

A photo of Anderson Cooper

How sassy is Anderson Cooper? So sassy, right? I adore this man, I really do, and I always love it when people tell it like it is, so what choice did I have but to simply rejoice when Anderson didn’t hold back about how ridiculous it is that Chris Brown is acting in a romantic comedy?

Here are Anderson’s true words:

“Ladies and gentlemen, particularly ladies, Chris Brown has been cast in a movie. And not just any movie, it’s a romantic comedy based on a self-help book about relationships. And I, for one, can not imagine why this did not happen sooner because if there’s one thing you can say about Chris Brown, who’s currently on probation for viciously assaulting his then-girlfriend Rihanna, he just oozes romance.”

Anderson also went on to describe some of Chris Brown’s methods of apologizing by saying “Check out this love poem he posted on YouTube five months after he repeatedly punched her in the face and threatened to kill her while her mouth was filled with blood.”

Chris Brown’s response?

A photo of Chris Brown

“Yeah, I guess I did beat my girl pretty bad, huh? LOL!!!”

Ok, come on now, let’s be truthful: who seriously still admires Chris Brown? Besides Justin Bieber, of course.

Look, Daniel Radcliffe Loves Anderson Cooper Too!

Oh, beautiful Anderson Cooper, of course Harry Potter would love you.  You are a special brand of magic all by yourself.

Right, but remember how Daniel Radcliffe is starring in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying?  Anderson Cooper is going to be there too.  Well, he’s not going to physically be there – he’s playing the Narrator, which is just a recording – but his essence is going to be there, and could Broadway really handle more than that?

This is like a glorious blend of everything I find beautiful in this world: musical theatre, magic, and seriously attractive older dudes. The show opens on February 26th, so mark your calendars and don’t be surprised if the entire world crumbles under the weight of too much wonderful.

Quotables: Oprah Doesn’t Think Anderson Cooper Can Fill Her Loboutins

“No! The next Anderson, yes. But he will not be the next Oprah.”

- Oprah Winfrey, responding to whether or not Anderson Cooper’s daytime talkshow will make him the next Oprah Winfrey, during a Q&A session about the OWN Network yesterday.

In print this looks pretty snotty on Oprah’s part. Well, snotty in the way that only Oprah Winfrey can get away with being because she’s otherwise the closest living thing to Christ on our planet. The heir of, “No one will ever replace me, not even the guy who saved that Haitian boy and is also a closeted homosexual.”

I’m going to go ahead and assume that she means that everyone’s such a special snowflake that Anderson Cooper could never replace her because he’s too uniquely him to be anyone but himself.

Caption This: Lady Gaga and Anderson Cooper

A photo of Lady Gaga and Anderson Cooper

Image via Gawker

This is a picture of the beautiful Anderson Cooper interviewing that zany Lady Gaga in London.  I love how Lady Gaga looks like she’s schooling Anderson Cooper, like Anderson’s all “ok, but listen, you can see your damn underwear, girl, and your glasses and your shoes are just damn stupid.  It’s chilly out here.  There’s something to be said for practicality, girl, that’s all I’m saying,” and Lady Gaga is like “no, YOU listen to ME, Anderson, are you wearing a sweater vest under there?  Lame as fuck.”

On a similar note, I have never heard anyone express anything less than complete reverence for Anderson Cooper’s beauty.  That’s universal, right?  Please don’t break my illusions this time, you guys.

Anderson Cooper is Amazing

You may have caught this extremely emotional clip by now, but it’s absolutely deserving of it’s own post. Yesterday in Haiti, where thousands of People are currently without food and shelter due to the 7.0 magnitude earthquake that devastated the country last week, CNN reporter Anderson Cooper made headlines for his bravery. A store was being looted and things quickly escalated in to violence. Anderson saw a young boy get hit with something causing massive amounts of bleeding, and ran over to aid him. When the video picks up (and this is very difficult to watch, so let me warn you of that before you click), Anderson is dragging the boy over to a safer area. The two stand there stunned for a moment. Anderson was clearly acting on impulse when he saved the boy from harm’s way, and the boy… well, it’s quite clear why he’s confused. Anderson keeps it together and proceeds to comfort the boy while looking around for help and ultimately walking him away from the cameras.

What will get you about this video, if it’s not the general sadness of the situation, is when you recognize the panic in Anderson’s face. His gut clearly took over and helped him do the right thing. When he realized what was going on, the intensity of the situation seemed the blow him away and you can see that in his face and hear it in his voice. It truly is amazing how most humans have the instinctual desire to help other human’s survive. Seeing video like this reminds you that you may not have the cash to donate or the time to take off work to help in Haiti, but if what’s going on down there was happening in front of your face, you’d have no choice but to help.

Kathy Griffin Ushers in the New Year by Cussing

She wasn’t about to let her live television appearance scoot by without causing some controversy! For the second year in a row, Kathy Griffin brought us all into another annum with vulgarity. During a CNN shoot with Anderson Cooper, she opted to pronounce Balloon Boy Falcon Heane’s name as “Fuckin.” It’s at around the 0:55 mark in this clip. Anderson Cooper just mutters “you’re terrible” and moves on.

The network said in a statement Friday that it “regrets that profanity was used during our New Year’s Eve coverage.”

As for Kathy? This is her statement: “Like every other serious reporter covering the now infamous balloon boy hoax, I struggled to pronounce his name ‘Falcon’ correctly and have gotten a kick out of how many ways I’ve heard it pronounced by other serious reporters. Just add me to that list and happy new year!”

You gotta hand it to this woman, she knows how to stay relevant. She’s like Paris Hilton but with a talent.

My friends and I ushered in the new year with fondue and a house party. Of course, I took lots of pics and made a little video. You can check them all out on my personal blog if you’d like.