Today's Evil Beet Gossip

There’s A New Marilyn Monroe Movie And Nobody Told Lindsay Lohan

A photo of Marilyn Monroe Poor Lindsay. Last year, Michelle Williams totally stole the role she was born for in My Week with Marilyn, and now there's another Marilyn movie, Blonde, in the works, but did Lindsay get the part? No, no, Naomi Watts had to steal that away from her too. The injustice of it all. But really, this new Marilyn movie sounds really good: As to the scope of “Blonde,” don’t expect a “Lincoln”-like sliver of the troubled star’s life. "It's about her whole life,” Andrew Dominik ...

Child Protective Services Are Getting Involved in The Halle Berry Mess

A photo of Gabriel Aubry and Halle Berry I'm so impressionable, you guys. Is Gabriel Aubry the villain here? Did Halle Berry orchestrate this whole thing? I don't know. The only thing I know for sure is that Halle's man, Olivier Martinez, is the asshole that knocks a guy unconscious and then makes a citizen's arrest. Oh, and I also know that things are about to get even worse in the aftermath of The Great Thanksgiving Debacle of 2012: The L.A. County Department of Child Protective Services will be formally re-opening an abuse investigati...

Chris Brown: Still A Douchebag, Now Without Twitter

A photo of Chris Brown I know, it's ANOTHER story about Chris Brown being a bad person, but this is a really good one! It's one of the ones where Chris proves it himself with his words, and those are my favorite! You'll see. Ok, basically Chris Brown got in this Twitter fight with a comedy writer named Jenny Johnson, who is now one of my personal heroes. She was funny, he said a bunch of immature shit, and then he deleted his Twitter. I'm going to try to recount the conversation for you, but since Chris' Twitter isn't there anymore, it might be a little difficult. Bu...

Charlie Sheen Gave Lindsay Lohan $100,000

A photo of Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan You know what they say: give a crackhead a fish and you'll feed her for a day, but teach a crackhead to fish and she'll probably fall off the boat and then you'll have to deal with a bunch of lawsuits. Ha ha, but seriously. Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan aren't two peas in a pod, but two jackasses in a crack den, so when they came together to work on Scary Movie 5, it makes sense that they would have gotten close. Ok, now let's review an old story: Lindsay Lohan never pays her taxes. When she does manage to get a job, she spend...

Lady Gaga Eats Thanksgiving Leftovers Naked

A photo of Lady Gaga Sorry, we don't have pictures or anything. There's not a porn of Lady Gaga tantalizingly gnawing on a drumstick or rubbing cranberry sauce all over her body. No photos of her doing disgustingly literal things with stuffing. Nope, it's just a story that she told via Twitter, but it's still sweet. From Us Weekly: Lady Gaga is no stranger to strange occurrences, but even she couldn't anticipate what happened on Thursday, Nov. 22, when she woke up in the middle of the night to raid the frid...

Halle Berry Wants A Permanent Restraining Order Against Gabriel Aubry

A photo of Halle Berry, Gabriel Aubry, and Nahla From TMZ: Halle Berry is taking no chances ... she's going to court early this week for a restraining order against Gabriel Aubry after the blowout fight Thanksgiving day ... TMZ has learned. Sources familiar with the situation tell TMZ Halle and her lawyers are alarmed that Gabriel allegedly started the fight with Olivier Martinez right in front of 4-year-old Nahla. Although a judge issued an emergency order of protection -- requiring Gabriel to stay 100 yards away from Halle, Nahla and Olivie...

Tonight’s The Night!

A photo of Lindsay Lohan After what's felt like years of waiting, the big day is finally here. Tonight we will finally be able to see Lindsay Lohan's big comeback: Liz & Dick, the Lifetime movie that we've always dreamed of. We'll be able to sit down with our families and friends, or we'll just watch it at the gym because we don't have cable, and we'll all be better for it. We all remember that first review of the movie, and sadly, it wasn't all that positive. But since more time has passed, a lot more peopl...

So Here’s This Picture That Rihanna Tweeted Last Night

A photo of Chris Brown Yeah, that's it. Rihanna took this photo of Chris Brown with his stupid underwear hanging out, then she posted it on Twitter with the tag #BartObsessed. So that's it, I guess. It's officially on. And Chris Brown is obsessed with Bart Simpson, which just makes me feel this weird kind of loathing for him that I haven't quite felt before. Like, yeah, he's an abusive asshole who is constantly doing or saying something stupid, but now he's all that and also a guy who travels around with a ...

Today in Crazy Town: Jesse James Is Engaged

A photo of Jesse James I thought it was over. I honestly thought it was over. I thought that after Jesse James the gross asshole that was married to Sandra Bullock and cheated on her, broke up with Kat Von D it would all be over. Jesse James would fade into obscurity, taking his evil ways with him, but no. This guy just won't quit. He's engaged. He's been dating this drag racer, Alexis DeJoria, since September, and they've been "bonding over their love of motor racing," according to a source. Now, just two months later, ...

Lindsay Lohan Is Talking Too Much

A photo of Lindsay Lohan Lindsay is doing way too many interviews. Way, way too many. And I appreciate it, I really do, but I just don't know if it's a good idea for her. Like, she keeps saying all these silly things, and that's not going to help her get an Oscar. Which, by they way, she's still talking about. Here's her latest interview, from Us Weekly via Celebitchy: On love: “I’m not focused on that yet. I want to do a ton of movies first. After I win an Oscar, I can start thinking about love. I think ther...

Amanda Bynes Is Still Crazy And Also on Instagram

A photo of Amanda Bynes Oh, Amanda Bynes. I've missed this girl, haven't you? We haven't heard from her since all the way back at the beginning of this month when she was trying to tell everyone that she's a retired multi-millionaire. Since then, she's probably just been wandering around New York, acting weird in public places. But now we have proof that she's been wandering around, acting weird in public places. For instance, here's what she did last weekend: Nickelodeon nightmare Amanda Bynes grew huffy at PH-D after she thought women sitting nearby were trying to take her photo, even though the...

Blind Item: Justin Bieber Wants His Own Action Movie

A photo of Justin Bieber From Blind Gossip: Lately, this young star has been making more headlines for his personal life than for his talent. Well, his handlers are desperate to deflect your attention and give you something else to talk about. So, believe it or not, his next big project will be… as the lead in a feature film! His preference is an action film, but he will settle for a romance. Either way, he wants to prove that he is multi-talented and not a baby anymore. Turning him into an action star or a v...