Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Samantha Ronson Has a New Girlfriend

57159700lindsay_lohan410200942932pm It's been a little over a week since Lilo was barred from entering Charlotte Ronson's clothing line launch party, and the news spread that Sam and Lady Lolo were splitsville. But already, rumors are spreading that Samantha Ronson has a new girlfriend-- a dark-haired "mystery woman" named Cindy-- and was seen getting up close and personal with her at that very party. This same woman was also reportedly seen coming out of Ronson's home this past Sunday morning. Suddenly, Lilo's tweets about Sam being a "cheat" make a lot more sense...

Truth is Stranger Than Fiction

The above 2007 "interview", in which Tracy Morgan calls out Oprah and impersonates a pregnant woman while lying on the news desk, will be used in its original format in an upcoming episode of 30 Rock, further blurring the line between TV and reality, and the line between being funny and being batshit fucking insane....

John Mayer “Flirts” with Demi Lovato on Twitter

mayer_lovato NASA scientists hope that equipment contained in the new module for the International Space Station (whose official name will be revealed on Tuesday's Colbert Report ) will allow them to finally be able to differentiate between giant gaseous planets and John Mayer's ego. It's understandable that they'd be confused, since the two are so similarly massive with strong graviational pulls capable of bending visible light. His handlers should probably get him off of Twitter. Now. Before he hits ...

A Night with the Flight

[caption id="attachment_33008" align="aligncenter" width="500" caption="Jemaine is waaaaaaay hotter than Bret"]Jemaine is waaaaaaay hotter than Bret[caption id="attachment_33008" align="aligncenter" width="500" caption="Jemaine is waaaaaaay hotter than Bret"][/caption] Last night, I thought I'd lost my cellphone in the Ryman auditorium at the Flight of the Conchords show. This immediately led to fantasies of one of the guys finding the phone and liking my wallpaper of happy nacho chips drowning in cheese (and one morose chip who realizes what's about to happen to him and his brethren) so much that they'd attempt to track down the phone'...

Power Rangers Actor Sentenced to Death

[caption id="attachment_33001" align="aligncenter" width="394" caption="Tired of riding Zords, they will kill you and steal your yacht."]Tired of riding Zords, they will kill you and steal your yacht.[caption id="attachment_33001" align="aligncenter" width="394" caption="Tired of riding Zords, they will kill you and steal your yacht."][/caption] As if Hasbro bastardizing Cobra Commander for the upcoming GI Joe live action movie wasn't enough, get the lube ready-- because your childhood is about to take another one up the ass. Skylar Deleon, who guest starred as Roger in a few episodes of The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, has been sentenced to death for murder in the first degree. Orange County S...

Parton Me? A Top Ten Album Released on Cracker Barrel Records?

Watching You Are What You Eat-- the BBC show where the skinny pale-looking British lady smells your farts and looks at your poo to tell you you've got too much yeast in your diet-- has convinced me to start referring to my weight in terms of stone instead of pounds-- because 11 stone sounds so much more managable, and no one really has any idea how much that is. Stop your mouses right now-- don't you DARE go to a weight conversion site. I weeel keeel you. That's sort of an awkward segue in...

Boxcutters Cut from Nelson’s Canadian Tour

Billy Bob Thornton and His Cigarette at Sundance, Pictures Photos I'm off to a bit of a late start today. You can attribute that to a) a heinous cold, b) spending several hours yesterday wedged under a toilet in the downstairs bathroom trying to avoid being carried off to Oz, and c) Flight of the Conchords Show at the Ryman last night. I'll have more to write about b and c some time later on this weekend. As for now however, I've made my morning run to Bojangles for a Cajun Fillet with cheese and a coffee so large I swear I saw Michael Phelps doing laps i...