Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Chastain Totally Doesn’t Hate Jennifer Lawrence

Jessica Chastain is tired of asshole reporters claiming she hates people she doesn't - namely Jennifer Lawrence. Showbiz Spy claimed sometime late last year that Chastain became angry with Lawrence after the latter portrayed her during her hosting gig on SNL. First of all, who gets mad over an SNL sketch? Oh, that's right - nobody. Second of all, this story is just more bullshit made up by papers to pit women against each other and make us all seem like catty bitches incapable of having a) a...

Helen Mirren Looks to ‘America’s Next Top Model’ For Fashion Inspiration

Helen Mirren is a film legend, so she could show up at an awards show in a paper bag with a mop end for a wig and old KFC buckets for shoes and no one could say shit because she's doing her and has earned the right to do so. She didn't quite go that far at last night's BAFTAs in London, but she did take a popular hair trend to the pensioner set by dyeing her hair a lovely shade of bubblegum pink, an idea she got from... an unlikely source, shall we say. From People: "I saw it on Americaâ€...

Melissa McCarthy Gets Called a “Female Hippo” by Rex Reed: A Story in .Gifs

melissa mccarthy pics Listen, Identity Thief seems like a pretty sub-par comedy despite its genius stars, Jason Bateman and Melissa McCarthy. The script is weak and the plotline is corny, but thankfully the actors save it from being a total disaster by being masters of gesture, delivery and physical comedy. While it might seem natural to criticise a shitty movie for the above shortcomings, Rex Reed - the Grumpy Old Man in human form film critic for The New York Observer - did nothing of the sort. Instead, he concentrated on insulting McCarthy about her weight w...

Lil Mama Will Play Left Eye in the TLC Biopic

Prepare to twist your face into a "What the hell?" squint, because Lil Mama is set to play the role of Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes in the upcoming TLC biopic. Two questions: 1. Why is Lil Mama still working? 2. Why is there a TLC biopic? (I mean, CrazySexyCool was classic and all, but really?) The casting news was revealed by MC Lyte, who described Lil Mama to Hip Hollywood as a "talented lady whose chances were cut short".  Uh, cut short by what, her crashing the stage at the MTV VMAs in 20...

So, Mark Wahlberg Was Kind of Drunk During an Interview

Mark Wahlberg was promoting his upcoming film Broken City on the UK's  The Graham Norton Show on Friday night, but something in the water wasn't clean. Or, well, it wasn't water, because the Funky Bunch's frontman seemed a little less than sober. The highlight of the appearance had to be a very flushed Mark sitting on Graham's lap while playing with his nipples. And by "highlight" I mean "uncomfortable event I will never unsee". Sarah Silverman was also on the episode, and you know shit is going...

Poor Kate Gosselin Is the Victim of Adult Bullying

kate gosselin pics Poor, unfortunate soul Kate Gosselin. It seems that all the hair extensions, Botox and Lumineer-fitting in the world can't shield you from the cruel world outside, because the reality star turned whatever the hell she is now has been bullied relentlessly by the big bad Internet. Let's all give her a collective "awww!" and tell her it'll be okay. From Bullyville: I've been bullied. A lot. Sadly, I'm not unlike many people in today's society. When people think of 'bullies', they likely think ...

Toni Braxton Announces Retirement From Music to Play a Lesbian On Screen

Toni Braxton was the shit in 1996 - all 4'10" of her (not her actual height, but the bitch is short). Don't act like you didn't put 'Unbreak My Heart' about six mix tapes you made to commemorate that girl/boy in your math class finally talking to you in the lunch room, but only to ask if you were gonna eat your french fries. Toni was just too real. Unfortunately, her bad times didn't stop at her fake video boyfriend dying in a motorcycle crash. Homegirl had to file for bankruptcy and all ...

Christina Applegate Is Jumping Ship From “Up All Night”

Up All Night never did very well in the ratings despite having a pretty phenomenal cast, leading NBC to announce plans a while back to revamp the show into a multi-camera comedy complete with laugh track. Boo! Obviously not feeling that bullshit, Christina Applegate has decided to give it the old heave ho and get the hell out. From The Hollywood Reporter: Christina Applegate has departed the sophomore comedy, The Hollywood Reporter has confirmed. "It's been a great experience working on U...

Jennifer Saunders Doesn’t Care Who Hates the Spice Girls Musical ‘Viva Forever’

So you probably know there's a Spice Girls musical called Viva Forever on in the West End in London at the moment. You may also know that the reviews for the show have been rather scathing, calling it everything from disappointing to absolutely terrible. Since it was penned by Jennifer Saunders - you know, she of Ab Fab and French and Saunders fame, among many other things - most people expected it to be absolutely brilliant. It's not, though it could be worse. The point is, Jen thinks the only people who did...

Nigella Lawson’s Refrigerator Is An Homage To Missy Elliott

Nigella Lawson is amazing: she's beautiful, she makes amazing food, she's English... what more is there to talk about? For someone who makes her living cooking diabolically delicious dishes, the fact that her refrigerator at home is absolutely massive should come as no surprise. What does come as a surprise, however, is that her kitchen equipment was inspired... by Missy Elliott? From People:
"I saw Missy Elliott had the world's biggest fridge, and I thought, 'One day I've got to have that fridge!' " says Lawson, as she gestures toward the 7-ft.-tall Sub-Zero appliance at one end of her expansive London kitchen. "So it's called the Missy Elliott Memorial Fridge. It is so huge, but I love it."
The Missy Elliott Memorial Fridge! How good is that? It's a simultaneous burn because she's not dead, but her career seems to be. (Shut up in the comments, I'm a massive hip hop fan and know she's featured on a few records, just leave me be.) Also, here's a tid-bit that'll blow your mind grapes: Nigella is 53!!! Say what? One more thing: her Everyday Brownies are diabolically good, and you should make some immediately. /> Nigella Lawson is amazing: she's beautiful, she makes amazing food, she's English... what more is there to talk about? For someone who makes her living cooking diabolically delicious dishes, the fact that her refrigerator at home is absolutely massive should come as no surprise. What does come as a surprise, however, is that her kitchen equipment was inspired... by Missy Elliott? From People: "I saw Missy Elliott had the world's biggest fridge, and I thought, 'One day I've got to have that fridge!' " says Lawson, as she g...

Bradley Cooper’s Mom Isn’t Fond of Zoe Saldana, I Guess

Bradley Cooper and Zoe Saldana got their swerve on for about a year before splitting up,  though Zoe's not taking the news so well. She's desperate to get him back, but Bradley's got another woman in his life steering him in the opposite direction: his mother. From Radar Online: Gloria Cooper, who lives with her handsome movie star son, has told Bradley, 38, not to take her back because she just isn’t so sure she’s the right girl for him. But at least one source tells Radar that Bradley isn’t listening and he is seeing Zoe! “Gloria...

Who Knew? George W. Bush Is a Modern Day Van Gogh

George W. Bush pics It's hardly secret knowledge that George W. Bush is an absolute idiot, but is he an idiot savant? Perhaps. After a hacker exposed email correspondences between several members of the Bush family earlier this week, you might expect deep, dark secrets and details of global conspiracies to have been exposed. Sure, there were details of the former POTUS' poor health last year and other things that I couldn't care less about, but the most interesting thing to come out of the scandal is that ol' Geo...