Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Lindsay Lohan’s been hospitalized with the Chikungunya virus

lindsay lohan

It was only a few weeks ago when Lindsay Lohan‘s vacation was nearly ruined after she contracted a case of the mosquito-borne Chikungunya virus. She seemed to be soldiering on, not wanting to miss out on precious yachting time, but apparently it’s got the better of her again and she’s been so ill that she was forced to seek treatment at a London hospital.

Lindsay Lohan is in a London hospital with a rare, incurable virus she apparently picked up in Bora Bora … TMZ has learned.

We’re told Lindsay contracted Chikungunya, a virus transmitted by mosquito bites that causes fever, joint pain and fatigue.

Lindsay vacationed in Bora Bora over the holidays and then flew to L.A. to shoot an Esurance commercial … we believe for the Super Bowl.

Lindsay began complaining of the illness just before New Year’s. She then went back to London where she became so ill she couldn’t walk.

Lindsay is currently in King Edward VII’s Hospital … the same place the Queen gets treated. They’re keeping Lindsay because she has a high fever and the joint pain is unbearable. As for her prognosis … we’re told the joint pain could last for months.

Oh man, that’s not very fun. You really don’t have anything in life if you don’t have your health, and being in constant pain to the point that you can’t walk or do anything is so depressing and awful. No matter what you think of Lindsay Lohan, I don’t think anyone deserves to be ill/in pain (except maybe child molesters or some shit, but you get my point).

Hope you recover soon, LiLo.

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

Zooey Deschanel is going to marry the dude that knocked her up

jacob pechenik zooey deschanel

The last time I checked, it was 2015, right? I’m not just imagining that? I wanted to double check, because some puritanical bullshit is still going down in this country whereby women are getting knocked up by dudes and then a week later, announcing that they’re engaged to said dude because, I dunno, I guess if you’re having a baby with someone, the Bible says he needs to be your husband? Nevermind that they’re doing it the wrong way around, but whatevs! Zooey Deschanel is marrying the father of her future child, Jacob Pechenik!

Love, marriage, and a baby carriage! Pregnant Zooey Deschanel is engaged to boyfriend Jacob Pechenik, her rep confirms to Us Weekly.

The happy news comes one week after the New Girl actress, 35, and her producer fiance, 42, confirmed that they’re expecting their first child together. Deschanel is due to give birth to the little one this summer.

Well, good for them, I guess. I’m sure this will totally be a long and fruitful marriage, considering it was borne out of the fact that she forgot to take her pill one morning or he didn’t pull out quick enough. Anyhoo… congrats!

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

Elton John making $500k per show in Las Vegas

elton john

Elton John may be long past the prime of his career, but he’s also a living legend, so obviously he’s getting paid the big bucks to perform in concert. How many “big bucks”, exactly? $500,000 per show to perform in Las Vegas at The Colosseum, far outdoing Britney Spears‘ run at Planet Hollywood.

From TMZ:

Elton’s definitely in the driver’s seat. According to his deal he gets 88% of the door for every show. He also has a sign off on ticket prices, which range from $55 to $1,000 for VIP seats.

Captain Fantastic is putting Britney’s $475K take a show to shame, because he’s doing it with fewer seats — The Colosseum only seats 4,296 while Britney’s show at Planet Hollywood has 4,600.

The show began Friday and runs through April 14.

Isn’t it crazy how easy it is for rich people to get even richer? $500k! For ONE SHOW that runs about 2 hours! That’s like, a decade of work for normal people!

Sigh. Maybe he’ll write me a check if I ask nicely?

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

Katy Perry’s Super Bowl halftime show is drawing near!

katy pery jj watt

Katy Perry will be taking over the Super Bowl halftime show REALLY soon, and her PR is working really hard at making sure we’re all super pumped about it and ready to tune in come next Sunday. To that end, so to speak, they’ve put her on the cover of ESPN Magazine with Houstan Texans defensive end J.J. Watt, who have about as much chemistry as the stars of the 50 Shades of Grey movie (and I don’t know if that’s an insult or a compliment).

There wasn’t much to the accompanying interview, but we did find out that Katy is feeling a bit nervous leading up to her big day and that doing the halftime show is better than anything she’s ever dreamt of.

“Honestly? I feel like I’ve outdreamt my dream,” she says. “I don’t get nervous about much, but I’ll definitely be a little tingly inside that day.”

Huh. Perhaps more hilarious is that Katy seems to think she’s on par with Celine Dion when it comes to vocals, since apparently people would stop in their tracks whenever she started singing when growing up.

“Everybody would be going about their business, and then all of a sudden their heads would turn when I would start singing. It was this magic trick that I had. I guess I loved that attention. And I went for it,” she says, laughing. “But when I was singing into a hairbrush, I had no idea the incredible amount of work that would be asked of me in order to be at this level.”

Now, y’all know I love KP – massive fan. And I also think she’s far more talented than people give her credit for. But to say that her voice is so good that one would turn their head when she starts? LOL girl, no. Just no.

I can’t wait to see what she comes up with for the Super Bowl, though. Someone tell me what time the halftime show is on so I can tune in right as it starts (and turn it off as soon as it ends).

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

The Daily Links

chris hemsworth

Chris Hemsworth doesn’t care for fake Hollywood shit [Socialite Life]

Can’t argue with a little Sofia Vergara in Spandex, can you? [Celebslam]

Paula Patton is a lot happier since ditching Robin Thicke [Moe Jackson]

Christina Milian took her nipples to the streets [Taxi Driver Movie - NSFW]

Gwyneth Paltrow spent the weekend in a bikini on the beach [Lainey Gossip]

Look, it’s Ashley Greene being sexy while pumping gas! [Popoholic]

John Travolta explains his late night gym cruising [The Blemish]

Sarah Stephens looks hot in her new Agent Provocateur lingerie ad [Drunken Stepfather - NSFW]

Fergie is opening up about her marriage to Josh Duhamel [I'm Not Obsessed]

Sigh! I’m really going to miss ‘Parks & Recreation’ [theBERRY]

Let’s enjoy Cara Delevingne doing some topless sunbathing [Taxi Driver Movie - NSFW]

Lena Dunham & Taylor Swift have a weird ass friendship [The Frisky]

Sarah Palin tried to talk about ‘American Sniper’ and it didn’t go well [Celebitchy]

Mario Lopez is going to marshal the Miami Gay Pride parade [Romance Beat]

Oooh, I really like Brooklyn Decker‘s new haircut [Too Fab]

FKA Twigs released the video for ‘Pendulum’ and it’s great [PopBytes]

Kanye West read a poem as a child and you should watch it [Celebuzz]

Jennifer Lopez is doing the whole sexy thing for ‘Complex’ [Drunken Stepfather - NSFW]

Chad Michael Murray is married and going to be a dad [ICYDK]

Paris Hilton might be dating an 18-year-old model [Socialite Life]

Amber Rose is fighting your bikini hate with another bikini [Celebslam]

Blacc Chyna forgot to wear a bra with her see-through top [Taxi Driver Movie - NSFW]

Can someone tell Gwen Stefani it’s time to change up her fashion? [Moe Jackson]

Kristen Stewart wants a bit of that Marvel money, please [Lainey Gossip]

Dakota Johnson is going to be a very big star, right? [Popoholic]

Some girl got eaten out on stage at a Dead Kennedys concert [The Blemish]

Blind item time! Stars love selling each other out for cash [I'm Not Obsessed]

Rachel from Friends had some weird ass clothes [theBERRY]

Mike Huckabee thinks Beyonce will turn kids into strippers [The Frisky]

Antonio Banderas will always love Melanie Griffith [Celebitchy]

Would you wear a black wedding dress? [Romance Beat]

Audrina Patridge is in a bikini, so there’s that [Drunken Stepfather - NSFW]

Lana Del Rey wants to take you on a honeymoon [PopBytes]

David Beckham is stripping down from H&M again [Too Fab]

Don’t worry, Kris Jenner is here to help Kylie‘s career [Celebuzz]

This is what Elizabeth Hurley wore to Fashion Week [ICYDK]

Kim Kardashian’s “furkini” wins at Photoshop

kim kardashian furkini

It looks like Kim Kardashian finally got the hint that she needed to hire someone a bit more adept at Photoshop, because her latest pictures – apparently shot by Kanye and retouched by someone with a professional degree in digital image editing – while on vacation are a true spectacle to behold.

You can’t even shade these pics – the Photoshopping is on point – they’ve made her look like she’s got insane curves, the flattest stomach ever and basically picture perfect. Just like God intended it. Beyonce, take note! This is how you make yourself skinnier/not look like a normal person with imperfections in pictures!

kim kardashian furkini 2

kim kardashian

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook

LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian’s reality show got canceled

leann rimes eddie cibrian

Perhaps the world just wasn’t ready for the genius of LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian‘s reality show. It must not have been, because VH1 has canceled the series after just one season, according to People.

There’s no word on why LeAnn & Eddie totally bombed – especially since they planned to use the show to ~take their lives back~ and dispel rumours about their marriage or whatever. Totally exciting, enthralling must-see TV, right? Who wouldn’t care about two C- list celebrities as they claw to hang on to any amount of spotlight? What’s not to love?

There were only 6 episodes of this gem, which premiered way later than it was supposed to and bombed in the ratings when it finally did air. Gone too soon – pour some out for these idiots.

Follow us on Twitter | Facebook