Today's Evil Beet Gossip

David Bowie Is Making “Old Bump-And-Grind Stripper Music”

A photo of David Bowie Last week, my boyfriend did this thing where he said "hey, can I talk to you for a minute?" And because I do this thing where I worry about every single thing that ever happens in my life (by the way, when I was talking to my therapist about this, do you know what she said? She said "just stop." Seriously? And when she made me tell her about all the things I do to keep from worrying, she said "yeah, just stop." And I was like "if I could just stop, I probably would have by now," because...

Nicki Minaj Is A Diva And Now She Doesn’t Have A Hairstylist

A photo of Nicki Minaj I am sorry, but Nicki Minaj is just the worst. She really is. There was the time that she threw a fit because the grass outside of a dressing room was too long to walk on. And that time that she told her own fans that they should "eat shit and die." And that time that she and her boyfriend yelled awful things at a maid and then pushed her around. The. Worst. She's so bad that her hairstylist and wig guy, Terrence Davidson, decided to quit. Here's his statement: "I've decided to step...

Quotables: Elizabeth Banks Just Pissed Everyone Off

A photo of Elizabeth Banks "Two is very different from one. When you have one kid, you feel like you can jet set around and you can throw him on the hip and you get your life done. You don't realize how easy one is until you have two. Now I'm really a mom. Oh, I am a mom now! This is for serious - I am responsible for two people now." - Elizabeth Banks explains that she was not really a mother until she was the mother of two children. Oh, Elizabeth. Oh, girl, no. Take it back. And to make matters worse, Elizabet...

Kim Kardashian Needs You to Shut Up About The Whole Kris Humphries Thing

A photo of Kim Kardashian "It's like, so old news. I'm technically, like, legally married, and I'm like, pregnant, but some other, like, man got me pregnant. Like, not my husband. Like, yeah, ha, like, ha. Hilarious, guys. Like, so hilarious. Whatever." Ok, now just imagine that line said in a weird, drawn out, sort of nasally voice. That's basically what this whole entire interview with Kim Kardashian is about. She did an appearance on a radio show, along with Kourtney Kardashian, and of course everyone wan...

Lindsay Lohan Probably Isn’t A Prostitute, Maybe

A photo of Lindsay Lohan I just don't know what to think, you guys. This is hard. Is Lindsay a prostitute? Is she not a prostitute? She's so misunderstood. Just like her dad. Because here's what happened: there was this new story all about how Lindsay is getting paid to go on dates with rich dudes. Or, ok, obviously the story wasn't new, but this quote from Michael Lohan was: “She is getting paid to date rich men. Dina is pimping her out – it’s disgusting!” But just shut your stupid mouths, because he never, ever said that, ok? Not ever. Not...

Ryan Gosling Loves to Knit

A photo of Ryan Gosling Hey, girl. Let me ask you something, if that's all right. Are you tired of guys who simply want to paw at your angel cushions and poke at your love chasm? Do you just want to say "hey, lover, I'm sore and I'd rather just a Kardashian show and knit"? Then please extend an invitation my way, girl. I'll provide the yarn if you can provide the wine. But no, really, Ryan Gosling really loves knitting: Ryan Gosling's perfect day involves knitting. The 'Gangster Squad' actor has develop...

Taylor Swift Hit on Bradley Cooper, Bradley Cooper Was Like “LOL, No”

A photo of Bradley Cooper From Radar: You just know there’s another song that’s going to written from this: Taylor Swift wants to hook up with Bradley Cooper, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.  And now the superstar singer has asked  pal Jennifer Lawrence to introduce her to Silver Linings Playbook co-star Bradley. The newly single 23-year-old country music singer desperately wants to date the hunky Hangover actor and has begged Jennifer, 22, to set up them up. However, when Jennifer sounded Bradl...

Let’s Talk About Britney Spears’ Breakup Again

A photo of Britney Spears Look, I need you guys to get real with me for a minute: do you care this much about Britney Spears' broken engagement? Because I really do. I think it's super interesting, and I've always been curious about the creepy specifics of her conservatorship. What I'm saying is that I'd love to talk about this story whenever there are new rumors out, but if it's too much, I'm willing to listen to you guys. How much do you want to hear about Britney? Anyway, here are more details about what happened...

Jennifer Lopez “Would Love” to Have More Babies

A photo of Jennifer Lopez And so it begins. And by "it," of course I mean Jennifer Lopez's campaign to get Casper Smart's sperm inside of her baby factory. It's going to come hard and fast, just like ... oh god, I can't even finish that joke. Before we get too far into this, here's what Jennifer actually said: "I would love to have more. I don't know if it's in the cards for me, but I would love it." There's no word on if she was holding Casper's hand when she gave this quote, squeezing it hard and looking right...

Jessica Simpson Got Her Own Sitcom!

A photo of Jessica Simpson When I think about the things that the world needs, a sitcom starring Jessica Simpson, based on her life, is actually pretty high up there. It's probably like no more wars, more equality, less poverty, Jessica Simpson sitcom. In that order. Luckily, Jessica herself has realized this, and so did some people who could make it happen. So it's happening. Yes. From Us Weekly: Ready for your closeup, Jess? Second-time mom-to-be Jessica Simpson is set to star in an NBC comedy pilot present...

We Need to Talk About Anna Kendrick

A photo of Anna Kendrick Here's why we need to talk about her, ready? Because I LOVE HER. I loved her in the Twilight movies, where she played Bella's dumb friend. I loved her in 50/50, where she played Joseph Gordon-Levitt's therapist/lover. I loved her in Paranorman, which, if you haven't seen it, is just amazing. I really, really loved her in Pitch Perfect, because Pitch Perfect is one of my new favorites (expect a story about why we need to talk about Rebel Wilson soon). I think that this Anna Kendrick is just a delight. But ...

Jason Trawick Broke Up with Britney’s Dad First

A photo of Jason Trawick and Britney Spears Warning: this story is really, really gross and it will make you feel exceedingly sad for Britney Spears. It was also probably make you hate Jason Trawick, as well as Britney's dad. You know, if you didn't already. From Radar: Britney Spears’ professional life and finances aren’t the only things that are controlled by her conservators. In fact, RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned that the Toxic singer, 31, had very little to do with the decision process regarding her split...